Today, in the middle of having sex with my boyfriend, instead of saying something sexy, he decided to tell me that the bowling alley had a new air hockey table. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while in the middle of having sex with my husband, instead of saying something sexy in my ear, he whispered, "We are so gonna make pizza after this." FML
Today, I was having some rare good sex with my husband, when he suddenly said, "I'm fuckin' BORED," and pulled out so he could go play his video games. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Today, I was having sex with my new boyfriend, and I realized that he enjoys making airplane sound effects while inserting himself inside of me. Moment ruined. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in bed, when suddenly, he turned to me and started playing with my breasts as if they were turn tables and he was the DJ. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend told me he thought of new positions for us to try in bed because it was getting boring. We haven't had sex yet. FML
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Top comments
danielrp34 7
Thats hella sexy!
airplanefood 0
Air hockey turns me on.
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Comments (92)
shutyourmouth 0
quit whining, air hockey is sexy and you know it
jaybirdka 0
why are 12 year olds *******?
captainamerica50 0
Are you ******* kidding me? Yea alright fyl cuz your boyfriend isnt some movie character that only speaks in sexy pre thought up lines. Go find something better to do.
CFR 0
OMG have his babies! Hey at least he wasn't saying "Let's pretend you're someone else" like the other FML...=/
bobthecowenator 0
He was probably just nervous.
nicelyjohnson 0
I gotta say, after just coming back from a missions trip... your life really isn't f*cked. at all. Whiney brat.
Rydizzle 0
what isnt sexy about that? I love Air hockey!
sillylung 0
I am sick of these "Today, my boyfriend (sexual activity) (something mildly unsexy happens)." I request REAL FMLs.
lalalalaura 0
Seriously! All the good FML's have been made a loonnngg time ago. Fmylife.com is losing it's touch because the people who are moderating the FML's think all of them are just hilarious no matter how many common one's there are..
cherry_blossom 0
Maybe he had been meaning to tell you and been forgetting. And now that he got the chance while he remembered, he decided to break the good news to you. It would be excellent news for me and my boyfriend because we play air hockey like crazy. I win most of the time. =]
pifpafpoef 1
a loving girlfriend would let her man win the game
briedis 0
C'mon, he was just trying keep his thoughts off coming too soon ;)