Today, in an effort to repair our fake Christmas tree, my girlfriend succeeded in gluing it to the floor. I can't get it loose. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I bought a Christmas tree and carried it up three flights of stairs alone. I finally got it inside, only to realize it was too tall. I tried trimming it, but now it’s crooked, shedding everywhere, and leaning like it gave up on life. I hope the greenish marks on the ceiling won't be permanent. FML
Today, I spent 15 minutes trying to get my cat out of our seven-foot Christmas tree. Once he was done, he tore about the house and broke the nativity scene, beheading baby Jesus and a wise man in the process. The tree is fucked. FML
Today, after spending hours putting up our tree and decorating it, it fell over and shattered the glass ornaments. FML
Today, our Christmas tree was damaged beyond repair after my son and his friends borrowed it for a little experiment. They tied balloons to the branches and tried to make it fly, after seeing a similar video online. FML
Today, we spent hours decorating the Christmas tree, perfectly balancing the lights, ornaments, and tinsel. Ten minutes later, the cat thought it was a right time to reenact Die Hard and climbed up the tree, knocking it over. Now my ornaments are shattered, and my cat is smugly sitting in the wreckage. FML
Today, my family and I were decorating the Christmas tree. It seemed a bit unstable, but we decorated it without any problems. Later, while my daughter sat by the tree, it began to fall. Her grandmother stopped the tree from hitting her. I, on the other hand, screamed like a little girl. I'm a 38 year-old guy. FML
Today, my Christmas tree was finally shipped. FML
Today, I fell in a vent in our floor while decorating our Christmas tree. My husband removed the grates months ago to increase airflow. I fell in past my knee and he had to pull me out by the arms. It's been four days and I can still barely walk. My office is on a second floor... We don't have an elevator. FML
Today, my family and I went Christmas tree shopping. My husband and I were walking around when I saw the perfect tree. Excited, we immediately bought it. When we got home and set it up, I realized it came with a present: termites. FML
Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML
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Top comments
MermaidSongXOXO 6
You know, fake Christmas trees have removable branches...;) Think about it: when Christmas is over, you have a 24/7 stripper pole for your girlfriend to use.
wtfismyfml 0
less decorations to put up next year
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Comments (97)
elektrik_fml 0
I'm sure it'll come off eventually...and it's not like this is an inappropriate time to have a Christmas tree anyway!
null_fml 11
Unless it was glued to the floor on its side or something. Which, considering it was an accident, is not too unlikely.
seanreddog 4
I don't think he means his "Christmas tree".
youthink_fml 0
Pretty stupid solution. She's definitely the dumb ass, and based on your comment, so are you.
polico_wolf 0
why did he say his christmas tree if he didnt mean it?
seanreddog 4
Woohoo! Christmas all year!
jessxoxo28 5
haha, true :)
bill4ever 0
That would be AWESOME!! no, I'm not being immature about this
lokiitababii69 19
omgg id love it! im keeping up my tree all year... then again... i have a charlie brown xmas tree.... literally i bought that tree... with the one ornament and all :)
YDI_King 0
i agree with numba 3
wtfismyfml 0
less decorations to put up next year
Nikiebear226 0
That stinks.
seanreddog 4
Kwanza is a mainly African American holiday. I'm betting the op is white. If they were black, they wouldve used duct tape.
seanreddog 4
No offence. Us rednecks use duct tape too.
flgirlwguitar 2
LMAO! Good One! Anyway, a little nail polish remover should do the trick. Yes, it'll take the finish off your hardwood if that's what it's glued to, but I'd take that over a fake xmas tree glued to the floor.
sleephunters 8
seanreddog FTW haha
MacOSXpert 7
YDI for having a stupid girlfriend.
kaleid0scopeEyes 0
You should glue her to the floor
BritishHobo 0
XD to the last two comments...
mopho 0
LMFAO
MrMeganFox 0
lolz is she blond??
KatieGoesRawrr 0
Are you blonde?
seanreddog 4
Are you blonde?
8trickster8 0
Are you blonde?
Boxingsweets 0
Are you blonde?
RaidenXS 0
Are you blonde?
sleephunters 8
Are you blonde?
Mylife_is_so_fd 0
Are you blonde?
alexandraa_fml 0
Are you blonde?
amy397123 0
Are you blonde?
lightningthunder 0
Are you blonde?
dinosaursmoo 0
Are you blonde?
Kervik 0
Are you blonde?
polico_wolf 0
c-c-c-combo breaker
seanreddog 4
Polico_wolf: you're a dirty blonde!
Aha09 1
That's what she said! Hehe :)
izzy_90 0
haha! that's what i was thinking! "i can't get it loose"...
eatinyokidz 0
she shoulda been in the kitchen where she belongs!
imahappeemoocow 0
don't be so sexist! pig!
Stotan1228 0
don't be so feminist!! Bitch! It was a ******* joke. Jesus Christ...
bailo 0
but... it wasn't remotely funny.
null_fml 11
Yeah, I've got nothing against the whole "kitchen" humour fundamentally... I used to participate, for that matter... but it's gotten SO old. It's just annoying now.
jennay8288 1
lol you're probably fat, huh, number 17?