By Milked Richard - 06/02/2015 04:14 - Australia - Wagga Wagga

Today, I woke up with my penis taped inside a milk bottle. Yes, I'm as baffled as you are. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 185
You deserved it 5 627

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I'd love to know the story behind this.

I think this may be the first time in 30 years that I literally have nothing to say. Enjoy therapy!

Comments

I feel like the only person wondering just how big the opening on this milk bottle is. I've gone pee in Gatorade bottles and know I don't fit in one of those..... Generally speaking, a milk bottle neck is in comparison to a U.S. quarter. Now add tape on top of that, and you've got your self a one way ticket to the ER. Sorry o.p. Hope your little guy survives with minor cuts and scratches.

Im guessing he just misunderstood the meaning of getting your dick wet..

#75 not trying to sound conceded at all by saying it doesn't matter..... Still not the slightest chance of fitting.

Maybe the milk was really cold and it shrank? Either that or he's just not well endowed at all.

Here in Australia, most of our milk bottles have quite large openings. Yes, large enough to fit either an erect or flacid penis.

I'd love to know the story behind this.

I just want to know what kind of tape was used. Should we be praying that this poor fellow wasn't a victim of duct tape?

I think this may be the first time in 30 years that I literally have nothing to say. Enjoy therapy!

And yet, you managed to say something about not having anything to say...

Dreamsorrow93 24

better inside a bottle than caught in a fan, tbh

Looks like someone's been practicing the Cowboy routine in their dreams

So THAT'S where the white stuff comes from!

Exactly why everybody should swallow. It's good for your bones!

#33, what if they are lactose intolerant?

Luke16eirb7deneuwn1 20

Why was I looking for this?!?