Today, I woke up with bruised nipples because apparently my boyfriend likes to excessively play with them while I sleep. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend, he had his head on my chest and we both fell asleep. Suddenly, I woke up by my boyfriend biting my nipple, hard, in his sleep. I now need to go to the pharmacy because of a bleeding nipple. FML
Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in bed, when suddenly, he turned to me and started playing with my breasts as if they were turn tables and he was the DJ. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that sometimes my nipples taste like onions. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that when my nipples are hard, he thinks that they look like giant zits, and when he squeezes them, he imagines them popping pus. He then reached for my chest. FML
Today, me and my boyfriend had some crazy rough sex. In the process I ended up with huge bruises and bite marks all over my neck and chest. I'm giving a speech on domestic violence today. FML
Today, my boyfriend figured out that he can bounce small things off of my boobs, and has been doing it every time I look away. FML
Today, I woke up in a guy's bed to one of his cats licking my nipples. FML
Today, a few days after getting my nipples repierced, my man initiated sex. Normally, I love it when he's a little rough on my tits, and I guess he forgot about my not-entirely-healed nips. Let's just say sex ended REAL fast. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to pick me up and throw me on the bed. I rolled off and broke my collarbone. FML
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Top comments
lucifer69_fml 0
YDI for having nipples
NeonWar__ 0
wow. ouch. You must be a heavy sleeper if you can sleep through someone playing with your nipples so hard it actually bruises them! lol
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Comments (114)
hotboy977 0
milked yyeeewww lmao
tAlk_NERdy_tO_ME 0
how could you sleep while someone's kicking your nipples' ass? mine are so sensative, idk if i can believe this one..next your gona say you woke up to an awful taste in your mouth...
shadaboo2014 0
agreed...the first part
brissychick90 0
I swear this happens to me as well although he will never admit it
Dx2 0
agree with #7
supmofukka 0
thats why u dont let ur man play with ur body while ur tryna sleep.....theyre alittle rough handed, but u gotta love them tho lol
xEvAnEsCeNcEx 0
ur retarded numba five. EVERYONE HAS NIPPLES!!
rberry_fml 0
hah and u didn't feel it? heavy sleeper right there!!
Viper32233223 0
63 SWEEEET!! anywa that waznt funny and it shouldn't hav been a fml
notyou123 0
how is that FML? oh no ur bf likes to play with u, come on! her's an idea try staying up then maybe u can even enjoy it
amberbby69 6
I wonder if her boyfriend is the same guy on another FML post where he was sucking on her boob and he thought milk was coming out when it was just his gum. Maybe he didn't believe it was his gum and he decided to milk them for proof?