Miscellaneous: Today, I woke up to a stranger in my dorm room. He was naked... - FML

By thewallrules - 05/12/2009 14:10 - United States

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my dorm room. He was naked and was peeing into my water bottle. He kept asking for Chris. I have no idea who Chris is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 972

You deserved it 3 451

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Same thing different taste

By gold3nshow3r - 09/03/2017 20:00 - United States - Roanoke

Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 564

You deserved it 434

By breeeeeh - 21/06/2013 22:18 - France - Brou-sur-chantereine

Today, I woke up to a stranger in my bed. Just as my parents responded to my screaming, I remembered that I'd helped my boyfriend sneak in through my window last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 679

You deserved it 69 921

Spooky

By Scaredwitless - 28/01/2011 04:35 - United States

Today, my roommate decided to prank me by leaving a fake suicide note on the bathroom door and lying motionless in a bathtub full of water and red coloring. When I went, horrified, to take a closer look, he lunged at me and screamed. I was so scared I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 901

You deserved it 6 012

By CollegeFreshman - 11/09/2009 04:20 - United States

Today, I heard a knock on my door and, thinking it was my student adviser, opened it. I was greeted by a drunk girl, who pushed her way into my dorm room, informed me that she lived here last year, and then told me that she lost her virginity in my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 599

You deserved it 3 737

By Anonymous - 09/10/2009 22:58 - United States

Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 470

You deserved it 2 801

By nude - 15/01/2010 00:43 - United States

Today, I woke up in my boyfriend's dorm and decided to take a shower before he woke up. I used the girls bathroom on the above floor, and afterwards just threw on a towel and ran to the elevator. I forgot to press my boyfriend's floor and I was taken to the lobby in a towel. People were waiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 048

You deserved it 32 275

Creeped out

By HadToApologize - 03/11/2009 05:20 - United States

Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 371

You deserved it 23 060

By whymyroomthough - 06/08/2014 22:18 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 189

You deserved it 3 223

By TJ - 07/01/2010 16:50 - India

Today, my friend whacked me on the family jewels while I was washing my hands in the college bathroom. While I lay writhing in pain on the floor, a guy at the urinal turned around towards me to see what was wrong. He was still peeing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 228

You deserved it 2 996

Never in the buff

By ShyVirgin - 19/06/2021 05:01 - United Kingdom - Derby

Today, a staff member entered my room, thinking it was empty. I was naked. This is the second time something like this has happened in the week I have lived here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 106

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Top comments

xdyingxwishx 0

Saturday 5 December 2009 19:54

Haha damn, lock your door!

monkey314159 0

Saturday 5 December 2009 19:55

wtf... which college is this again?

Comments

badvoodoo 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 0:14

PCP

jessxoxo28 5

Sunday 6 December 2009 0:14

WOW...peeing in a bottle and asking for chris... thats just scary

musicislife1995_fml 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 0:22

well quite clearly you should know Chris ;)

turdburgers 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 0:47

This shit is exactly why I NEVER left my door unlocked. Someone on my hall last year woke up to a random drunk guy in her room. You never know who the idiots in your dorm will let in off the street.

LALALALagirrl 1

Sunday 6 December 2009 0:48

LMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ommg, that made my day:)

FerrariCake 2

Sunday 6 December 2009 0:51

At least you have a funny story to share with the family during the holidays!

FerrariCake 2

Sunday 6 December 2009 0:53

Make a shopping list: 1. New water bottle 2. deadbolt for door

hedgehogs 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 1:04

You don't lock your dorm door?

The__Redneck 7

Sunday 6 December 2009 1:32

That's when you take an ax-handle and put a little red in that bottle.

nightmare1234 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 1:42

lmfao!!!he was peeing in a bottle?!??!? lolz never invite crazy strangers in ur place!!lesson learned!:)

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