Today, I woke up at my boyfriend's place with grumbling stomach pains. I left him in bed to go have explosive diarrhea in the bathroom next to his room. When I was done, I came back to bed and snuggled in next to his sleeping body. He rolled over to whisper, "I heard everything." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML
Today, I was in bed with the stomach flu. My boyfriend thought it would be funny to fart in the fan next to our bed, which caused me to vomit all over myself. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet with a really bad and noisy stomach upset. Then I hear a knock on the bathroom door. My boyfriend had decided to make a surprise visit. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were finally able to settle on having a day out together after putting it off for months because of work/other random reasons. This morning I woke up with the worst case of diarrhea I’ve ever had in my life. I won’t be leaving the bathroom anytime soon. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML
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Top comments
AliSama 17
that is not a bad thing. People get sick and everyone goes to the bathroom.
csigabajnok 0
So what? He thought girls never do the "poop" thing or a female fart is just a myth? Wake up, son!
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Comments (160)
LilMiss20 0
This FML made my laugh so much. Best one
kcooper4775 0
that's why you turn the water on lol
myah1109 11
*silence* ...awkwarddd
mullfritt 12
shit..
unusual_girl 3
LMAO this is hilarous! At least he didn't overreact or anything XD
Humanspider 18
Well it could have been worse...much worse.
kellandj2019 7
well, if it was as explosive as you said, you know it's the truth.
Sneekert 4
Jezus I've never even heard of explosive diarrhea, it's because of all that crap you Amercans eat. Just cook some veggies, eat some normal bread in normal quantities. Take care of your body for c's sake.
iwadasn 33
It's not literally explosive, idiot. That's just a common hyperbole that means "really bad diarrhea."
worldclassrager 41
Paper thin walls horrible with that issue...
dharmaint 15
If I was him I'd be laughing my ass off