Today, I woke up and looked over to see the "beautiful girl" I slept with last night. Turns out it was the obsessive girl from my class with a man-face I had avoided all semester. In conclusion, beer goggles are very real and very powerful. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after having some drinks at the club, I went home with this awesome girl. When I woke up, I thought the house looked really familiar. It belonged to my ex's younger sister. FML
Today, I was at a fraternity party, and one of the hosts said over the loudspeaker, "Turn to the person next to you and picture them naked, then drink a beer if the mental image disturbs you." I turned, only to be face-to-face with my ex-boyfriend. He drank two beers. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of drinking to find a very gorgeous girl in my bed. Her only words to me were "did anything happen?" When I replied yes she began to cry. Nice to know I was someone's rock bottom. FML
Today, I was at a bar, when a heavily drunk guy came up to me and slurred "Fuucckkk lady, your face... not even with beer goggles!" FML
Today, I woke up around 5am from a party I had last night, still quite drunk. This chick was lying next to me from the night before. I kissed her, and about a minute and a half into some heavy making out, she opened her eyes and said, "Oh, it's you." Then got up and walked out. FML
Today, I woke up in a girl's bed, who I've had a crush on for two years. She was sleeping on the floor with someone else. FML
Today, I woke up from a night of heavy drinking to find my girlfriend dumped me. Apparently I drunk-called her last night and told her that someone as beautiful as her could be with someone way better than me. She agreed. FML
Today, I woke up when the guy I had spent the night with slid out of bed. When he realized I was awake, he looked down at me, shook his head, and said "I've gotta lay off the beer..." FML
Today, on my way to work, I was checking my hair in the semi-reflective window of an office building. I suddenly realized that the guy I had a one-night stand with last week was standing on the other side, looking confused. He now genuinely believes that I am stalking him. FML
Today, I woke up next to a slumbering girl I had just met the night before. She had all the covers on top of her and I was cold. Not only was I cold, but the sheets were really cold. So I got up and realized she'd peed a drunken night's worth of beer all over my sheets. FML
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Top comments
Rosie_Posie43 12
Still a better love story than Twilight.
IntoTheClouds 42
YDI for getting drunk enough to sleep with someone you wouldn't want to sleep with sober.
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Comments (89)
Ks22 4
Wonder how she feels "damn the guy I have been obsessing over has a small penis and zero idea what to do with it." YDI
capslockisgood 19
Where did you get that from?
mvc3ftw 17
personal experience maybe?
loserman67 36
Seems to me that your indulgence in alcohol let your true feelings and desires surface and you took the man-girl home and fufilled every carnal desire that you have dreamed about with her. Hey, look at it this way, ugly chicks need love too and you probably made her night, unless she looked over at you and thought, "Oh no, it's that whiney, wimpy little asshole that thinks he's a cool guy that I have to pretend to like everyday." You never know, that door can swing both ways.
FlashBurn 13
The funny thing about that is that I've never had that problem with beer goggles interfering no matter how much I've had. Maybe you were just thinking with the wrong head!
Posthuman 26
If this were baseball, she could be your slumbuster! :D No? Oh well then yeah, that sucks.
loserman67 36
NOOR... you naughty little monkey ;)
TheJester12 15
It gets worse when you find out the girl with a man face actually used to be a hermaphrodite . Have fun repressing that :)
RedPillSucks 33
Or worse, an effeminate man. And OPs ass hurts and he's got hair in his teeth.
nerdchic 5
I've never had alcohol affect my judgment that bad.. You kinda deserve it yo.. Sucks to be you lol
0RedPenguin0 8
Moral of the story? Don't get drunk. This only applies if there are ugly chicks at the bar
gc327072 31
Broken condom style!
LemonandLime 13
Sounds like she deserved better than you in any case.