Miscellaneous: Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then...

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 11:26 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 107

You deserved it 3 496

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 05/09/2014 16:17 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend was about to sneeze. To avoid getting his new tablet wet, he chose to sneeze right into my face instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 990

You deserved it 3 892

By rozziepop - 30/03/2012 05:37 - United States - Visalia

Today, I saw my 22-year-old boyfriend blow his nose into his hand, then wipe his snot on our couch. There was a box of tissues directly in front of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 456

You deserved it 3 524

Do it again

By thornrose22 - 01/11/2009 00:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 222

You deserved it 3 198

By 911 - 13/11/2008 03:57 - France

Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 230

You deserved it 2 323

By UUUGHHH - 05/02/2016 20:33 - France - Villejuif

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 148

You deserved it 2 711

By Anonymous - 04/10/2014 12:11 - United States - Brevard

Today, I tried kissing my boyfriend on the tip of his nose. He sneezed mid-kiss and headbutted me. Now, there's just an awkward silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 677

You deserved it 4 725

By Anonymous - 28/11/2017 15:00

Today, I saw my 32-year-old boyfriend of 4 years pick his nose and eat it. The booger in question was attached to his nose and he sucked it out spaghetti-style. He then tried to kiss me. I still feel my stomach churning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 130

You deserved it 578

By Achoo - 15/10/2009 07:07 - United States

Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 894

You deserved it 5 125

By SierraDiaz2097 - 23/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Vardaman

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 615

You deserved it 9 660

By sneezer - 30/12/2008 04:54 - France

Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 159

You deserved it 7 018

DocBastard 38

Sunday 8 July 2012 16:26

Snot the end of the world.

zachherbert 10

Sunday 8 July 2012 16:52

I think this relationship is snot going to work. But who nose, she's the one who picked that booger.

Comments

angiefilee 5

Wednesday 11 July 2012 7:36

******

noisebox 1

Wednesday 11 July 2012 20:01

Gross, offer to let him lick your butt slurpy and see if he goes for it.... Sounds like he has retard tendencies.....moving on?

aislincalum 5

Friday 13 July 2012 12:29

You broke up with this guy, right?

fmlahahaha 5

Saturday 14 July 2012 17:41

I hope he's not your boyfriend anymore yuck!!!

stimpy12 5

Monday 16 July 2012 1:35

FYL ...... EWWW GROSS

Marissa1586 18

Monday 16 July 2012 4:17

Um........Did he wash his hands before touching you...at LEAST?

courtneeymac 4

Monday 16 July 2012 6:49

Ewewewewew, please tell me you made him wash his hands or something :$

liam_oshea 3

Monday 16 July 2012 17:43

I always do that!! Hahahah

deransc 19

Wednesday 18 July 2012 18:08

Epically Disgusting

boobs1234 5

Wednesday 26 September 2012 20:51

eewwww!!

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Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that mine and her father's wedding is just a big joke, and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 053

You deserved it 3 116

Today, I had to call social services after a couple once again brought their baby in with severe allergic reactions. His allergy? The family dog. These idiots would rather let their kid die than get rid of the stupid mutt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 121

The Top

Today, my parents tricked me by claiming we were going on holiday, but stopped at grandma"s first, "just to say hi", then left me there with my bags. They dumped me with grandma and went on holiday without me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 322

You deserved it 142

Today, I witnessed a man masturbate into a public urinal, miss, fart, and then leave without washing his hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 281

You deserved it 2 749

Today, I was interviewed by this TV crew who asked me what I thought of Rhode Island being voted for the second most neurotic state. I thought they said that Rhode Island was the second most erotic state. I commented. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 925

You deserved it 13 112

Today, my 5-year-old son put my car keys in the microwave thinking that they would 'warm up' my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 988

You deserved it 2 474

Today, my son came running in, saying he had a project due tomorrow. I asked when it was assigned; he said two weeks ago. I refused to help, saying that he failed to act responsibly and had to live with the consequences. Now he's throwing a tantrum and my wife is screaming at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 760

You deserved it 233

Today, I was "that idiot" who spent ages making a soup stock from meat and vegetables, but then while separating it forgot to put a pan under the strainer, so I poured the finished stock down the sink, leaving me with only the boiled meat and veg sat sadly in the strainer. Takeaway chinese for tea, then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 406

Same thing different taste

Do it again

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