Work: Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in...

By 911 - 13/11/2008 03:57 - France

Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 246

You deserved it 2 338

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Same thing different taste

By Roostermann25 - 31/05/2016 01:34 - United States - Lebanon

Today, while meeting some of the big boss guys at my new job, one of the men sneezed on his hand and then grabbed mine for a handshake. I felt every gooey bit of his snot between our hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 895

You deserved it 988

Gross

By maddie - 15/05/2020 05:00

Today, while I was working the drive-thru window, a customer sneezed into his hand and then handed me his money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 787

You deserved it 144

By Anonymous - 25/11/2015 13:37 - United States - Palmer

Today, my boss forced me to come into work despite having a bad cold. While waiting a table, I violently sneezed and sprayed a child's face with snot. His dad got so pissed that my boss had to pretend to fire me just to calm him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 733

You deserved it 2 656

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 11:26 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 122

You deserved it 3 502

By Confused and Disgusted - 23/02/2015 23:42 - United States - Sparta

Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 299

You deserved it 2 444

Gross

By gotanewmouse - 26/09/2011 10:37 - New Zealand

Today, I saw my co-worker sneeze into his palm, get up, walk to my desk and smear his hand all over my computer mouse. He then went back to his desk and continued with his work. Last week we had a workplace awareness meeting about my OCD and fear of germs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 022

You deserved it 6 804

New face

By Anonymous - 02/11/2010 14:20 - United States

Today, I went back to work after being sick for a week. While I was gone, they hired a new manager. Trying to score bonus points, and possibly a raise, I went to shake her hand and introduce myself. Just as I was about to say, "Hello, my name is…" I sneezed right in her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 898

You deserved it 6 453

By BoogieCandy. - 23/10/2009 08:56 - Canada

Today, at work, I was standing at the till helping an attractive man. I have a cold and could feel the snot bubbling up. He orders and we flirt for a bit. Just as I'm about to hand him his product, I sneeze quite loudly and forcefully all over his face. Guess I won't be getting that number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 438

You deserved it 8 590

Let it all out

By Anonymous - 25/03/2023 22:00 - Australia

Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 843

You deserved it 144

Menace to society

By Uri - 20/12/2024 09:00 - United States - Chattanooga

Today, I sneezed so hard during a meeting that my glasses flew off and hit my boss in the face. Now everyone keeps jokingly ducking every time I look their way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 111

juicebahx 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 0:53

I gagged when I read that. I still feel a little nauseated.

jixan 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 3:08

...strange lol

Comments

jixan 0

Thursday 26 February 2009 3:08

...strange lol

Pocahontas22_fml 0

Friday 10 December 2010 16:57

...gross

NoKo_fml 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 16:40

reminds me of something mr bean would do...lol

echigo109 0

Saturday 7 March 2009 16:30

THATS HILARIOS

dewey318 0

Saturday 14 March 2009 7:11

why would you do that?

evan_7899 28

Saturday 2 November 2013 21:26

Notice how its France, filthy French

juicebahx 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 0:53

I gagged when I read that. I still feel a little nauseated.

Boomi 38

Wednesday 14 September 2016 17:02

Same! That is completely disgusting!

dudewithface 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 1:42

next time ask if you can lick them

baldfatman 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:00

yummy

SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 21:17

I would feel the need to wash my hands after just SEEING that.

Vintage_fml 0

Wednesday 15 April 2009 15:33

thats....sick

vicky93 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 0:27

i wonder if he does that after wiping his ass too

zoerox01 0

Saturday 11 July 2009 13:36

hahaha i allmost pissed myself laughing i cant stop replaying that coment in my head

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The Top

Today, on the eighth day of my diet, I met up with my study group. Everyone was snacking on junk food while I stuck to carrots. Someone put a Snickers bar on the table. "God, I want you," I thought. Turns out I was thinking out loud. The guy next to me inched his chair away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 360

You deserved it 8 261

Today, I once again have to attend a family gathering and never hear the end of, “Julie, you’re 33 and you still haven’t found a man?” What they don’t understand is that every time I pour my heart out to a guy, I always get the ladder kicked out from under me. As a result, I can’t get close to anyone anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 127

The Top

Today, my girlfriend of two years called me over late at night. I got excited, assuming she finally wanted sex. No, she just wanted me to make her mac and cheese and talk to her because she was ‘restless’. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 550

You deserved it 914

Today, I was volunteering at a local hospital. I was eagerly introducing myself to all the nurses, as I would be working with them all summer. It wasn't until I got home that I discovered the giant piece of lettuce stuck in my front teeth. So much for first impressions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 604

You deserved it 1 967

Today, my house flooded. Hundreds of dollars worth of art supplies, multiple video game systems, academic awards from middle school, birthday cards from my deceased grandfather; it's all gone. What remained untouched? The cat's litter box, which somehow floated. FML.

I agree, your life sucks 15 259

You deserved it 1 119

Today, I got home to my daughter in tears because her dad decided 5 was the ideal age to tell her the chicken, bacon, and mince she eats every day comes from dead chickens, piggies, and moo cows. I now have a vegetarian 5 year-old and I’m seriously worried about malnutrition and stunted growth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 427

You deserved it 163

Today, I hired a private investigator to find out if my wife of 15 years is cheating on me with my brother. I don't know what's worse, that she is cheating on me, or that instead of cheating with my brother she's cheating with my brother's wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 247

You deserved it 5 554

Today, I’m still on bed rest recovering from life-altering surgery. My pain is unreal but the pills make me nauseous or knock me out cold. When I try to express what I’m going through, all anyone tries to do is cheer me up without listening. I just want someone to understand what I’m going through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 982

You deserved it 187

Same thing different taste

Gross

Gross

New face

Let it all out

Menace to society

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