Today, I went to the coffee shop for my usual morning latte before class. When I got my drink, I asked again to make sure it was soy. The barista assured me it was. It wasn't. I'm ridiculously lactose intolerant and just spent six hours throwing up because she was too lazy to correct her mistake. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I double checked with the barista to make sure my latte had soy milk. After a few sips, I could tell it wasn’t but it was too late. I’m so sensitive to dairy, I spent the rest of my work day trying to stifle the gut busting cramps and noxious fumes. I had a meeting I couldn’t reschedule. FML
Today, I stopped at the coffee shop before work and confidently ordered "my usual." The barista looked confused but nodded. When my drink came, it was completely wrong. Turns out, I was in the wrong coffee shop. I was too embarrassed to correct them, so I drank a weird matcha-pumpkin spice sludge. FML
Today, while working as a barista, a customer asked me for "gluten free milk". When I told her that most milk is gluten free, she flew into a fit of rage and cussed me out for being a "cheeky bitch". My manager then lectured me about not being "patronising" to customers. FML
Today, I went to get myself a latte to make myself feel better after having a bad day. As soon as I sat down to enjoy it, I spilled it all over myself, another customer, and the floor. FML
Today, I was trying to flirt with a cute girl when I asked the barista, “Make mine just like hers.” It turns out she'd ordered a decaf soy lavender tea latte. I hate all of those words. FML
Today, as a barista, I tried to be quick during the morning rush. Someone asked for oat milk, so I grabbed the carton without checking. It wasn’t oat milk, it was the cleaning solution bottle we keep under the counter, same shape, same colour cap. Luckily I noticed before serving it, but my manager watched the entire thing in silence. FML
Today, I ordered my usual at my local coffee shop. The barista asked, “Name for the order?” For some reason, my brain short-circuited and I said, “Latte.” So they called out “Latte” when it was ready, and I had to shame-walk to the counter. FML
Today, while serving a line of ten customers by myself at the coffee shop I work at, I knocked over a cup of steaming hot milk and it went all over the coffee bar, espresso machine, floor, and myself. I then had to act like everything was fine and make a line of drinks with milk everywhere. FML
Today, I went in to my local cafe for my morning coffee. I was chatting to the barista as she was making it, and I mentioned that I was starting a new diet. She goes, "Oh that's great! I've been sneaking skimmed milk in your coffee for years, I didn't want to say anything…" FML
Today, I'm in the south of France and I was trying to impress a cute date at a coffee shop by ordering in what I thought was perfect French. He gave me a weird look, and the barista looked confused. Turns out, instead of ordering a "latte," I asked for "lait," which is just milk. I sat there awkwardly, sipping my cup of cold milk while he watched. FML
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Top comments
ghembob 2
You could sue... just saying.
TheTruth1428 0
I hope you went back, talked to her boss, and got her fired. Firing her is the least the boss can do considering the lawsuit you could have for what happened.
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Comments (106)
the_stereotype 0
i hope you threw up in their bathrooms so they would have to literally clean up after their mistake.
O_D_I_N 0
YDI for being intolerant. You souldn't be so closed minded. What has lactose ever done to you?
Gruffy 0
LOL...thats fkin funny....sounds like the kinda thing i woulda done, but in the lobby...maybe im just spiteful ...oh, wait, i know im spiteful
iplayrugby18 11
"Are you not aware that I get farty and bloated with a foamy latte?"
karenbear 0
hahaha
Gruffy 0
I would find a new coffee shop, or file one HECK of a complaint...get that lazy-ass fired!!
ooohlife 0
same here! i HATE when they don't use soy, especially when i'm very clear about wanting it!
KP6167 0
K, I'm gonna be a bitch real quick, sorry. But come on, seriously, If you're such a delicate god damned flower then make your own soy half-caf light foam 145 degree latte. And if that doesn't suit your fancy then shut the hell up and call it a day. Thanks. :)
karenbear 0
i'm lactose intolerant also, and this happens to me all of the time. once i brought it back and they remade it with whole milk instead of soy. how do you make that same mistake twice? needless to say they don't care. i've been told i can sue, but i am just too lazy and it would just be expensive.
giganticbrain 0
**** lattes. **** coffee in general. And they do is dehydrate your body. Everyone always ******* flips their shit over coffee, like it was liquid god damn gold.
bcopeland 0
if you have allegies you should male it known..... they will be a lot more complacent if it's for an alergy rather than a personal preference...
jubilee_fml 0
My problem with this post is that lactose intolerance shouldn't cause vomitting. The enzyme that you are deficient in when you have lactose intolerance is in your small intestine. symptoms include abdominal pain, diarrhea, and gas, not vomiting. I also don't see why she would not make it soy on purpose, I'm sure she would know she could get in a lot of trouble for that. I don't think this one is real.