Today, I went to Starbucks to get coffee. The employees told me that there was no more coffee. I started cursing at them and told them that I am in a really big hurry, and that I need coffee every day. They had been yelling back the whole time. Little did I realize, they were saying April Fool's. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to admit that my coffee addiction is really bad when I woke up in a Starbucks with no memory of how I got there. FML
Today, my boss fired me because I "didn't get the right kind of coffee beans." FML
Today, I walked into Starbucks for a job application. I asked the manager if they were hiring, as I really need a job. He looked me up and down and replied, "NO!" There was a 'Now hiring' sign in the window. FML
Today, I went to Starbucks to get my free birthday coffee and due to a mistake I received two. Thinking it was my lucky day, I hurried off to work. As I was walking in, I tripped and spilt one coffee all over my new dress. Then I walked into a door and spilt the other. FML
Today, I stopped at Starbucks to get tea before work and was surprised that there wasn't a line. As I was leaving, the automatic door closed, knocking my tea out of my hand. I headed back in, only to discover a huge line had formed and they made me pay for the replacement that their door spilled. FML
Today, at work, a customer came in and ordered a "Butterbeer Frappuccino." When I said we serve no such thing, she yelled at me for "lying" to her, saying she knew about our "secret menu." She ended up complaining to my manager and demanded that he fire me. FML
Today, I was late for work and got chewed out by my boss. To console myself I decided to drink a cup of coffee and a cup of tea. My work provides this for free. When I did, my boss told me that in fact it wasn't, nor has it ever been, free; all this time I've been stealing other people's coffee. FML
Today, I went into a small coffee shop. In line, a guy came up to me and was like, "I haven't seen you here before, are you new in town?" and I replied with, "Oh, no I've lived here for years. The coffee here is crap, though, so I only come here when Starbucks is full." He's the owner of the shop. FML
Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML
Today, I went to my favorite coffee shop, ordered my usual, smiled at the barista I have a crush on, and confidently said, "You too!" when they told me to enjoy my drink. I have to find a new coffee shop. FML
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Top comments
sleepless15_p 0
You are an asshole. Why would you be so rude to the employees anyways?
Stupidpeople 0
If i'd of been working in the shop i'd of refused to serve you after being so rude.....or added a little something special when making the drink!! hehe!!
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Comments (238)
emptyego 0
You deserve that one. I agree with #1 and #54.
Uconnrunner 0
Agreed with #9. Stupid people and their caffeine addictions...if the terrorists went after our coffee supplies, America would be absolutely screwed up the butt with a Brad-Nailer.
a201 0
You're such a d!ck. Lay off the coffee and get a sense a humor.
CatieBabey 0
good call 38. my local Starbucks doesn't have a drive thru, sometimes I forget that some Starbucks have them...
Piemonkey 0
You're a real bastard.
Amkii 0
Maybe you should work on overcoming your addiction. Seriously. You yelled at people, didn't listen to their replies, were too brain-dead to realize it was a joke and a day full of pranks and jokes, and you even told them you NEED coffee everyday. Sounds like withdrawal from an addicted person to me. Get help.
heyjuuude 0
#46, god forbid some asshole doesn't get a cup of coffee in the morning. Some people are just ridiculous about coffee and treat it as if it were oxygen. Chill out!
kellster 2
You're a jackass. Even if they had been out of coffee, it probably wouldn't have been the people at the cash register's fault! And no one "needs" coffee every day, you moron. You just had a temper tantrum in public because you couldn't have something you like. Which, if you hadn't been so busy making a complete ass of yourself in public, you could have had even faster. They should have refused to serve you altogether after that little display! Grow up and stop being so rude!
aego56 0
Yeah yell at the guy behind the counter.. Joke or not - how would yelling would have helped? Do you think he would go to the back room and say "This guy's yelling, someone run to the grocery store and get coffee!!!" It's not his ******* fault they ran out. And why would you yell over somebody. How ******* rude do you have to be. Calm the hell down and go to the one across the street, you dick.
Spiffy 0
YDI for drinking starbucks. And do you think the world revolves around you that just because YOU want coffee they MUST have it?