Today, I went to my local Walmart to grab a few groceries, and while at the checkout line I grabbed two chocolate bars for a snack. The cashier gave me a look and mumbled under her breath, "Surprise, surprise." I'm pregnant, asshole. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was grocery shopping. When I turned around I noticed a group of teens passing by laughing. I didn't think anything of it until I got to my cart. The losers had left a pack of Slim Fast in my cart. I'm pregnant. FML
Today, a stranger at the grocery store rubbed my belly and asked me when I'm due. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I went to a corner store to restock my chocolate stash. A guy from work walked in to see me and the cashier arguing about the amount of candy I was trying to buy with a jar of pennies. He took one look at me and said, "That time of the month, eh?" FML
Today, as I was getting my mail, I noticed I'd received a free coupon from a baby supply store, saying, "Congratulations on your pregnancy!" Thinking it was a mistake, I showed my girlfriend, who I live with. All she had to say was, "Surprise!" FML
Today, I was grocery shopping, feeling good about myself, until when I was waiting in line at the checkout, a small kid in his mother's arms in front turned to look straight at me and said, "Ewwwww." FML
Today, at the grocery store, I saw a woman rubbing her belly lovingly and said, “Aw, congratulations!” She replied, “On what?” There was no baby. Just bread. FML
Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life." I'm 26 and just very short. FML
Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML
Today, I went to Walmart to purchase a pregnancy test. I chose my checkout line carefully, to make sure I didn't see anyone I knew. After choosing one, I realized it was 4 o'clock on the dot. Shift change. My mom's best friend took over the shift just as I reached the checkout. FML
Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year-old man with a beer belly. FML
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Top comments
Sarkany_fml 2
Your life doesn't suck. HER life sucks, on account of her being a total bitch.
MURIKKA 11
I don't think that cashier realizes just how close she was to being killed on the spot.
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Comments (179)
Hiimhaileypotter 53
Couldn't she get in trouble or fired for saying something like that to a customer? That's just downright bitchy.
NillaForRilla 7
Yeah, I think I would have reported her to a manager. She has no right to judge you whether you're pregnant or not.
LuckyLynx7732 5
Well I would say report her to her manager, but I think having to work at walmart would be the worst punishment you could inflict on her.
denden_mushi 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Since it's your local Wal Mart, maybe she keeps seeing you buy chocolates and that's why she said what she said. Still rude though. Congrats on the pregnancy by the by!
truckdriver321 3
Haha you fatty
yeezuschrist420 11
You should be burned in acid
conholio33 28
Did she even think those chocolate bars might not be for you.... Some people need a reality check
daringtoride 27
Sometimes people are so rude, but it seems to especially show when they have no idea of what the circumstance is :
BlowinChronic 18
Wow what an idiot. Since it was a Walmart cashier it was probably some scumbag from my generation so I'm not too surprised really, FYL OP just ignore the dumbass.
conqueror57 11
Having never met you, I don't know if this is the case with you, but too many women use pregnancy as an excuse to gain uncontrolled amounts of weight. Drs recommend a woman only gain 15-20 lbs, and if she was obese before pregnancy that she gain NO weight. If you happen to be one of these women, YDI
danifranklin 2
Conquerer57: ur an ass. the only way a pregnant woman could gain no weight is if she lost enough weight continually to cancel out the weight gain. Sorry OP sounds like another friendly Walmart worker. Congrats on the baby
avaeba 14
You kind of suck at life
avaeba 14
And btw, 15-20 isn't an accurate average. Typical gain is about 1 lb a week during pregnancy, and we (I say we because I'm 34 weeks) don't use it as an excuse to eat whatever and gain unrestricted amounts of weight. It's normal to be hungrier because we're making a person. I'm 190 where before I was 145 and my OB says I'm right on target.
u002764 3
Sorry all, but conquerer is mostly correct. While it is implausible to expect a preggo not gain any weight, the recommendations for weight gain are drastically reduced, though not completely eliminated when the mother is already obese. Still, a pregnant woman can have a chocolate bar when she wants. Hopefully it is within reason, but I wouldn't get between them.
0ops_i_died 8
Between the larger breast, a 7-8 lb baby, 2 lb placenta, water weight ect. 20lbs is pretty much a close to impossible goal for most women. Besides, the recommended amount of weight you should gain is determined on how much you weighed before the pregnancy. Obese people should gain less and vise-versa for thinner women. If you're a healthy weight before than 20-30 lbs is far more realistic
wildthang428 10
Ah, the views of most likely a man. Regardless of what you've read, every woman is different. I was REALLY good about what I ate, but I still gained 35 lbs. There is way more to it than just what you eat, so lay off the judgements.
conqueror57 11
Ok ok, I was off on my measurements, but I stand by what I said. These are the guidelines: Underweight: Gain 28-40 pounds Normal weight: Gain 25-35 pounds; Overweight: Gain 15-25 pounds; Obese: Gain 11-20 pounds. And I am a woman who has children. If this woman is using pregnancy to eat anything, YD
avaeba 14
The fact is, you don't know. And either way its rude to comment on a stranger's personal appearance. Doubt you would have appreciated weight comments during or after your pregnancies, obese or not.
yeezuschrist420 11
How about just don’t be a ******* dick?
llama612 27
You should complain to her manager she had no right to say anything like that and was just being a snarky bitch. If you're gonna say shit about customers you shouldn't work customer service especially if you're pretty much gonna say it to their face.