Today, I went to my girlfriend's house. She had promised me we'd get it on so I couldn't wait. When I got there, I didn't get it on. Instead, I got a list of reasons why I make her depressed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend told me how disappointed and depressed she was that she could never make me hard. She started ranting about her looks and how she fails at everything. I didn't know how to reply. I was hard while she told me. FML
Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML
Today, my girlfriend noticed that I looked upset and asked me what was wrong. I told her I was sexually frustrated. Her response? "What are you telling me for?" FML
Today, I went to see my girlfriend to talk about my anxiety, because it's been a big issue. She broke up with me instead. FML
Today, my girlfriend complained about our recent dry spell. I've been under a lot of stress at work, but I told her some things she could do to help. She decided a better idea was to scream that I don't care about her needs, and that I should never "burden her" with my problems. FML
Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML
Today, I finally had the opportunity to have sex with my girlfriend. This would be the first time for both of us, so I tried to make it really special. I had everything planned out to be very romantic. She loved how it was set up. After all that, I couldn't get it up at all, all night. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today, I asked a girl out. She sent me a whole list of reasons that she hated me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML
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Top comments
CookiesNOJ 0
think about it.. is that the only way she can get your attention? then you suck!
lovelyred 0
was having a small penis one of them?
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Comments (87)
thatguy626 0
I hope you listened, never do that stuff again, then you get to sleep with her. it's not rocket science
insanium14 0
ultimate blue balls
beavygirl 0
you depress me too, screw u lame-o
redeemer96 3
damn emo bitches can be so annoying sometimes.
matt643 0
damn emo slags:L dump her white ass fool
happyvampire16 0
for those of you who automatically assume that the girl is emo, your fuking ignorant. Human beings have emotional issues, not just emo people. so please do us all a favor and stop acting like ur such fuki hot shots ctin like shit dont hurt you at times -_-
Marcelb 17
i think the problem isn't so much that he didn't get laid, rather the fact that his gf is as manipulative as to tell him she'll have sex with him and then lay this on him. Pathetic. If he really depresses her, which would be wrong of course, she could've told him without saying he should come over for sex. Unless of course he doesn't come over for anything but sex, which would be enough reason to end the relationship to begin with.
OriginalPooh01 0
Just be quiet and let her read.
kbg8409 0
maybe because ur an asshole and don't treat her right! the fact that all you had to say was that u were disappointed cuz y'all didn't have sex, proves that's all u care about!
MsAnnabelle 0
Was one of them because you can't stop saying you want to 'get it on'?