By Anonymous - 21/01/2012 14:22 - United States

Today, I went to get a nice, relaxing hot stone massage. Instead I got second degree burns on my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 618
You deserved it 3 990

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Look on the bright side could be third degree burns

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Not so relaxing after all! Sorry OP

"Grown Ups", anyone?

Why do people go for hot rock massages anyways? They seem to always end up with burns.

Big mama anyone?

I would have chose a hot tub

34, not if it's done right.

OP wat made you change you'r mind?

Rock on op! That's so hot ;) Relax, the guys working there were probably stoned, soothey ought to be punished. With your luck I'd stay away from acupuncture. Hopefully my pointless little massage will reach you before its too late. :)

75 The puns, please make them stop.

I'm surprised no one's said, "sue" yet.

18: I know this is dumb but what do you mean by your comment. I feel stupid for asking but it went over my head and I couldn't catch it.

Hot rock massages really do wonders when done correctly! And acupuncture is amazing! It always makes me feel like I have a brand new body! :)

They were stoned

That cunt deserved to be burned. Only fags go to spas

103 Shut up. First of all, you don't know it was a male. Second of all, men go to spas all the time. Nice job showing just how ignorant you are.

Ya good call she is a dumb bitch

105 I hope you get modded.

Ur a fucking retard

95: I think it was in reference to the movie called Grown Ups.

110: lol fat ass

Keyboard warrior: y do u support gays?

110 thanks I haven't seen or heard of it lol

I've seen that movie more then once and don't remember anything to do with hot stones in it... Maybe my memory is failing me?

It's near the beginning. During a massage, Rob Schnieder drops a hot stone on his elderly girlfriend's back.

I kinda thought of Final Destination 3..

The elderly girfriend is also the same women at the boys basketball game, at the beginning of the movie! You know, the kid who Rob Schneider is supposed to be, winks and points at.

Well.. U said u want hot stones..

Why does everyone ignore 55's funny??? That was hilarious! Simple and on point... FYL op, at least you made us laugh I guess.

137 I thought of final destination 5 when the guy that gets acupuncture gets his head crushed by buddha....best movie of the series!

yesss! You should've jumped in a mud pool OP :) -xo.

Usually Id assume no pain no gain didn't apply to relaxing but I guess that's what happens when you assume.

My Translation for what #2 said is: In most scenarios, I would say the commonly used phrase "no pain, no gain," but said statement doesn't apply when taking a relaxing massage. On another note, bad things happen when you assume, although OP didn't assume in the FML, I thought like I should share that thought with you.

I think 2 was trying to be funny with their comment, but didn't quite hit the mark.

Like my grandma always said, 'assuming' makes an ass out of u and me!

I think 2 meant he assumed no pain no gain didn't apply to relaxing but that is what he gets for assuming not the OP assuming but for 2 assuming

Just like the McDonalds incident...

Or any incident where people could potentially sue and get money

Y u no like comment?

Well they did say it was hot...

37- hit wrong one by mistake. Total oops!

No offense to anyone but I find people who sue others bit of douche bags, depending on the reason. Like the McDonald incident, you order hot coffee and complain cuz it's hot. Are you expecting it to be cold or something? Sorry to any if I offended you. Just my opinion.

151- I agree with you on the McDonald's but spas are supposed to check temperatures of the items they use on customers ie: waxes, stones etc; if you get burned at a spa it is the complete fault of the esthetician.

The McDonald's coffee incident occurred because they made the coffee at a higher temperature than legally aloud leading to the woman's severe burns in her womanly areas. Just thought I'd clear that up.

^ also i heard that the specific store that it happend at was complained to over 15 times about their coffee being way too hot. Then again you shouldn't hold hot coffee by the lid (let alone any liquids). Honestly that would have been an interesting case to attend because there were many factors to it.

#157- a massage therapist performs hot stone massages, not an esthetician... Op- any legal massage therapist carries liability insurance, especially if they work for a big corporation such as massage envy. Talk to a lawyer to get financially reimbursed for the damages the negligent therapist caused. You can also file a complaint with the state licensing boards.

150 - The McDonald's incident caused 3rd degree burns resulting in damage through the skin down to the muscle throughout the woman's pelvic region and thighs. Keep in mind, there are four degrees of burns (four being the worst), so you can imagine how severe it was....and if not you can google it if you aren't convinced. 186 - The woman was holding her coffee between her knees while the car was pulled over and attempting to remove the lid to add creamer and sweetener; not by the lid itself. There is a documentary that goes into this case as well as others called, aptly, "Hot Coffee".

That sucks. Sorry, OP. Maybe next time you want to relax, try a mud bath or facial?

True. I do find giving a facial to be quite relaxing.

I give great facials

My creeper alert is going crazy! Maybe it needs new batteries...

74- reading your comment and seeing that you're not some idiot teenager, but an older man, just completely made my day. I applaud you. :)

96, you're whack. It's better an old man something like that to a young girl?

129 no kidding

considering that 74 knows what 4 meant by a facial, and made a joke, yes I think it was funny.

Gotta love creepy adult humour. :D

Look on the bright side could be third degree burns

Actually, second degree burns are the most painful, because third degree kills some of the nerve. Second degree is just enough to make it extremely painful but not enough to kill the nerve.

I had 2nd degree burn on my face, and they hurt like hell. And that was the only thing so far that made me double over in pain in my life!

Peach3 - that would be true except for two things: 1) you rarely get JUST a third degree burn. There is usually a surrounding rim of second degree burns as well. 2) Second degree burns (except the deep second degree burns) heal spontaneously, while third degree burns need to be excised and often require skin grafting.

92-What's your picture of?

I agree with Peach on this. Not only does it kill off nerve endings but the pain from the non-burned nerves often sends you into shock do you aren't as aware of the pain.

97: It's an x-ray of a dildo with the handle broken off.

I think if 97 has to ask, she's probably not old enough to know. Isn't it our responsibility to protect the younger generation from things like this? *wink wink*

Evilplatypus - no. Just no. Read what I wrote before. And the fact that you said "sends you into shock" tells me that you don't know what the fuck shock is. This isn't a matter of opinion - it's fact. Don't try to make it sound like you know what the hell you're talking about when you don't. It pisses me off when people spread medical misinformation.

Wow Doc, you seem to be a real pleasant person. I wasn't referring to circulatory shock, but acute stress reaction known in the psychological field as "shock". One of the primary symptoms of acute stress reaction is a dulling of perception and stimulus response. I.E. it lessens your ability to feel things. Perhaps YOU should know what YOU'RE talking about first. I on the other hand just got second degree burns two weeks ago in a sautéing accident and was told BY THE DOCTOR that third degree burns are accompanied by more pervasive issues (the frequent need for grafts and the higher risk of infection) however, second degree burns hurt worse for a less amount of time as opposed to the pain from third degree burns which are less intense but for a longer term.

Platypus, I'm a fucking trauma surgeon who specialises in wound care and did clinical research on burns. I know more about the physiology of burns than you could possibly imagine. So I know EXACTLY what I'm talking about, jackass. Just because you got a burn doesn't make you any kind of expert on jack shit. All your doctor did is confirm exactly what I said. Pure third degree burn are rare. Most of the time there are elements of second (and first) degree there. Jesus fuck, learn to read. Now stop arguing before you look REALLY stupid.

I think it's a little late for that, Doc.

How did my doctor "confirm" your post? He said 2nd degree was MORE painful, they just didn't last as long. I trust the word of MY ER doctor, who has cared for my firefighter grandfather and uncle every time they've gotten burned or smoke inhalation over some random person online. Besides, Peach and I were talking about 2nd degree burns versus 3rd degree burns. Not 3rd degree burns accompanied by 2nd degree burns versus 2nd degree burns. And after only two minutes on google search, I found quite a few medical references that agreed with me and Peach that 2nd degree hurts worse than 3rd (some said you might not even feel anything with 3rd degree because the nerves are dead [as I've already stated] or because the victim is suffering from psychological trauma [as I've already stated].

2B fair to EvilP, it sounds like your arguing the same thing they are. You keep saying that the third burns hurt because they come with the second type of burns. Which makes it sound like the second is the painful type.

READ MY FUCKING POSTS YOU ILLITERATE MORON! I've stated now twice (now three times, since you didn't seem to pick it up the first two times) that PURE third degree burns DO NOT HURT. But the chance of having a pure third degree burn is very low, and most of these patients have second degree burns which DO hurt. Do you fucking GET THAT NOW? I've taken care of dozens of burn victims, and I can guarantee you the third degree burn patients are in MUCH more pain than the second degree burn patients, not to mention the eschar excisions and skin grafting they have to go through. I don't claim to be an expert on everything, but THIS is a subject on which I have a tremendous amount of expertise. Your arguing with me is futile.

man I was going to like this, but doctors always ruin things

Medical Flamewars: Nothin' but a Ph.D thang

O.o wow. Ive seen doc angry but not THIS angery! I have a question for the doc though; i HEARD that your not supposed to put 2nd and 3rd degree burns into water right after the burn. I wasnt told why, but thats what they taught in high school health back in the day. If you shed some light on this, id apreciate it

And Doc claims his 10933782th victim of Internet rapage. Congrats to you Doc!

Actually, running the burn under cool (NOT COLD) water is exactly what you're supposed to do. It helps to stop the burn from deepening and helps with the pain. Part of my research was showing that burns can continue to deepen for several hours after the heat source has been removed. This can transform a first degree burn into a second degree, second to third, etc.

Ok, but what happrnds if you run it under ice cold water? This is really interesting cause i burned myself yesterday and was on the subject. (it hurt, but it didnt seem that bad so i didnt do anything and now its the size of a penny and pus started coming out)

Oh and when i first burned myself there the SMALLEST mark. I accidently touched a hot latern for a tenth of a second so thats why i thought it wouldnt be what it is

Ice can make it worse. Never ever put ice on a burn.

... What?? Please finish your sentance

*Sentence. Damn autocorrect

Why would autocorrect change it to a word that doesn't exist?

Wouldn't it be please start your sentence?

41 - autocorrect can be pretty retarded at times.

41-maybe it's because he's spelled "sentence" wrong so many times that autocorrect has given up.

7 was just building suspense for their mind blowing retort, so 7 go on ...

Why is this FML? You just became rich bitch! Sue them!

Ugh, I accidentally thumbed you up.

I thumbed him/her down for you. :)

That sucks. Lawsuit?

Already handled by the guy 4 comments above you. So you can chill.

It's actually 6 comments above

I didn't even look at the other comments...

I find second degree burns very relaxing.

What level headed masacist wouldn't?

I liked your comment purely out of humour.

But once the blisters heal, imagine how soft and supple your new skin will be on your new legs. They did you a favour!

Kind of a favor, except for the part where she was screaming in pain

No pain no gain.

28 - think positive

One day there will be no more pain, like an opiate wonderland. No more worry, it will all just end. Burns will heal!

Doc, I think you should write OP some extra pain prescriptions ;)