Miscellaneous: Today, I went to a club and my friends and I went up on the stage,...

By Anonymous - 29/03/2009 09:14 - Taiwan

Today, I went to a club and my friends and I went up on the stage, then the security told me to get down and said the stage was only for girls. I'm 23. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 263

You deserved it 6 788

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/09/2009 04:10 - Canada

Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 519

You deserved it 3 987

By Anothermoose - 26/05/2014 03:34 - United States - Victorville

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Turns out that bouncers don't think it's a problem for girls to go up on stage and make out with the musicians. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 955

You deserved it 5 846

By Anonymous - 01/12/2012 00:31 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I was out clubbing, when I saw a pair of very cute girls sitting at the bar, so I went over, hoping to introduce myself. I swung my leg over the stool, and through no fault of my own, sat on my own balls. I quickly got thrown out for "harassing the ladies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 187

You deserved it 21 603

By intranator - 08/04/2009 21:43 - Jordan

Today, I waited in line to get into a club with my girlfriend, the bouncer only let her in, she told me to call her if I needed anything and left me. We were supposed to celebrate my birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 117 920

You deserved it 9 689

By keenan - 19/09/2010 23:55 - United States

Today, I had to use my driver's license to convince the security guard at a game room that I was a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 021

You deserved it 5 189

By obese_chicken - 06/11/2009 06:59 - Australia

Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 053

You deserved it 8 323

By I Tried - 29/01/2016 22:18 - United States - Burton

Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 448

You deserved it 3 639

By lehonj49 - 21/06/2013 16:10 - Australia - Burwood

Today, after years of battling my social anxiety issues, I went out clubbing with my friends. A girl started talking to me and we actually hit it off. The next thing I know, I'm on the floor getting wailed on by some bloke for hitting on his girlfriend. She didn't do a thing to stop him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 845

You deserved it 3 655

By Anonymous - 07/12/2012 21:28 - United States

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 525

You deserved it 3 188

Passing

By reader - 04/12/2020 14:03

Today, I went to go to an aerobics class. Shen the instructor walked in, she went up to me and told me it was a women only class. I am a woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 080

You deserved it 134

babbling27 0

Sunday 29 March 2009 20:09

What does your age have to do with it?

ryan__h 1

Sunday 29 March 2009 20:07

i feel sorry for people who get called a man when they are a woman and vise versa

Comments

Serial 2

Monday 30 March 2009 3:15

shave your beard

ash90 0

Monday 30 March 2009 3:30

maby its time for a sex change...

Jennifer83 0

Monday 30 March 2009 3:59

Sucks for you! Maybe you should start dressing like your sex.

MEGAJOSH 0

Monday 30 March 2009 5:30

You're probably very unnattractive, that's all.

wallythedolly 0

Monday 30 March 2009 6:37

get a sex change.

log1k 3

Monday 30 March 2009 6:59

hahaha... I did that once.. im a guy, I was HAMMERED... :D

deardaniel_fml 0

Monday 30 March 2009 7:29

lol this is fake.

Drekos 0

Monday 30 March 2009 10:57

haha, manchicks

Blind_Ninja 0

Monday 30 March 2009 14:02

If you look that bad, you should have never got on stage to begin with.

No_Words24 0

Monday 30 March 2009 15:26

hahahaha!!! thats soooooo funny!!!

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Today, and every time I try to talk to my mother about being a lesbian, she just says in the most condescending way, "Oh no you're not sweetie, it’s just a phase." The "phase" has lasted 17 years, including marrying my wife and adopting twin sons, but sure, it’s “just a phase.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 733

You deserved it 229

Today, my fiancée's ex sent me screenshots of their conversation. In it, he told her how badly he’d wanted to marry her, what a great life he'd have given her, and what a huge mistake she'd made by letting him get away. My ring, our house even our pets should’ve been hers. Gee, thanks for settling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 167

You deserved it 133

The Top

Today, after 9 years of loveless marriage, my wife confided in me that she was always an introvert and depressed person, but pretended to be outgoing and fun loving with me up until our marriage, so she could marry me just to lift herself up from low class to high class society. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 309

You deserved it 127

Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out, I thought it would be funny to kick the door open and yell, "This is Sparta!" I lost my balance and fell flat on my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 266

You deserved it 66 577

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 795

You deserved it 4 723

Today, I was explaining the inner parts of a vagina and how they work. To my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 616

You deserved it 6 736

Today, I was walking back to my hotel from the town square, and got lost. I turned back and walked around town for an hour, freaking out and panicking. When I finally found the hotel, I realized it was practically a stone's throw from where I was when I turned around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 223

You deserved it 6 939

Today, a drunken customer blindsided me after I told him I would not be giving him a free drink after I watched him put his own hair in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 180

You deserved it 2 495

Same thing different taste

Passing

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