Today, I went swimming in a pond. I came out covered in leeches. Terrified, I screamed, flailed about and cried out for help until half a dozen people ran over. One of them was kind enough to point out that those leeches I was so afraid of were actually patches of mud. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I overcame my fear of swimming in lakes and went for a swim. I got bitten by an eel. FML
Today, I went skinny dipping with a few friends at my friend's house. It was really fun until one of my friends shrieked, saying there were bugs in the pool. Everyone jumped out and looked at her. Turns out the "bugs" she saw was my body hair. FML
Today, after returning home from a camping trip, I found a leech on my love spuds. I ended up having to call my dad in to help me get it off. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, at the beach, I swam pretty far out into the ocean. I ended up getting pummelled by the waves and got a painful cramp in my leg. The whole beach watched me flail and scream, while my friends rolled their eyes as they dragged me out of the water. FML
Today, a bunch of friends and I went skinny dipping in a pond. The guys all grabbed the ladies' underpants and waved then around. My bloody pad was inside of one of them. FML
Today, I was swimming in the ocean, not too far off shore. I had asked my mom to come in, but she was afraid of the water because fish had nipped at her toes or something back in the day. I told her there was nothing to fear. I ended up getting stung on the balls by a jellyfish. FML
Today, I nearly drowned. I was at a wave pool for the first time and stupidly swam out to the deep end. When the waves turned on, I discovered I can't swim in rough water. Despite my yelling, "Help!" and flailing around, the lifeguard paid me no attention. My friend had to save me. FML
Today, my brother flicked a huge bug onto my foot, making me freak out and fall into my outdoors pool. The water was so cold that I started hyperventilating. My brother left to "get help". I finally managed to get out, and found him watching TV. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
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Top comments
someindiandude 6
sure must have sucked
ShansAl 21
Oops, that's embarrassing. On the plus side though, no leeches!
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Comments (97)
McNerdyNerd 8
Ok, to all of you people saying 'yi for swimming in a pond' get OVER yourselves. Oh no, god forbid someone enjoy nature. Yeah, if they swim in a pond, they need to understand there might be things that can get them...but really...don't make fun of people just because you're too much of a stuck up city kid to swim in a pond. Anyway OP, sorry about your luck, but nothing was ever solved freaking out, you need to learn to calm down and be in control of yourself, especially when 'disaster' hits.
iamyummylicious 14
i aCtualy am trollong at thos point
zebralover23 14
Omg, this is too funny !
agreedtodisagree 4
I can totally see how you acted like a total bitch.
bubo_fml 11
Mud or a cess pond? (Think about it, Stinky!)
barbiidoll0908 1
You're pretty stupid. You would think someone would be able to tell the difference between leeches and mud.. *facepalm*
nadia_leed 4
Seemed like you tryed to make half a dozen people sound like a lot
dsgresl 2
Did you apply salt to rove the mud?
hateevryone 15
how can you not notice the difference?
alexmarieewing 6
I would have done the same thing lol