Health: Today, I went on my first ever assisted skydive. I fainted after... - FML

By Fuperman - 02/06/2013 23:14 - France - Illange

Today, I went on my first ever assisted skydive. I fainted after we jumped, and only came to as we touched the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 679

You deserved it 6 731

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Same thing different taste

Not cut out for this

By Anonymous - 18/12/2016 02:10

Today, I took my girlfriend skydiving for her birthday. I insisted on joining her to make it a memory for us both, despite my fear of heights. I passed out twice mid-freefall and had to be saved by the instructor both times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 807

You deserved it 1 412

By scardeycat13 - 08/01/2012 05:38 - United States

Today, I went snowboarding for the first time. I was so scared I passed out. I was only on the kiddy hill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 257

You deserved it 10 746

By Anonymous - 04/12/2015 20:36 - United States - Silver Spring

Today, my friend took me tandem skydiving. When it was time to jump, he began crying, said he'd cut our parachute cords, then said "Goodbye, cruel world!" and pushed me off the plane with him strapped to my back. I pissed myself and cried like a bitch. He thinks his "prank" was hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 104

You deserved it 2 937

By Erica - 08/07/2013 17:27 - United States - Mountain View

Today, my boyfriend and I were out cliff jumping, when for the first time, he told me he loved me. I panicked and pushed him over the edge and into the water. He's now in hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 628

You deserved it 72 531

Sick moves, bro

By Fish - 19/03/2009 15:47 - United Arab Emirates

Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 301

You deserved it 55 372

By Alyssa Charlotte - 29/07/2011 02:25 - Mexico

Today, after being terrified for years, I went on a plane for the first time. It was also the first time I "emergency landed." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 306

You deserved it 3 035

By Emcee - 05/06/2009 10:48 - Philippines

Today, it was graduation day, and the very first time I was hosting an event. When I got on stage, I stared at the audience for a good 5 seconds, then fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 640

You deserved it 6 169

High flying old bird

By Anonymous - 08/04/2023 04:00

Today, while on vacation with my family, I went parasailing. Just as I was about to take off, the wind picked up and I got blown off course. I ended up crashing into a boat and had to be rescued by the coastguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 679

You deserved it 109

By katiekat - 05/01/2010 20:24 - United States

Today, my ex looked at me for the first time in months. I felt like I could fly. Seconds later my flight ended. I fell down the stairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 954

You deserved it 12 658

By poolfail - 06/08/2014 21:14

Today, at the pool, I decided to face my fears and go off the high dive. I slipped off the edge and did a barrel roll into the pool while screaming like a little girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 097

You deserved it 6 550

Next

Top comments

cchan034 23

Monday 3 June 2013 5:25

Good thing it was "assisted"

Eliseopwns 22

Monday 3 June 2013 5:24

Thank god you're not dead.

Comments

Bcfrmkc816 17

Tuesday 4 June 2013 4:07

That really sucks now you have to go again so you can enjoy it

Futacy 29

Tuesday 4 June 2013 21:27

If OP passed out the first time, it's probably a problem with him and his circulation, so it's likely that he'd pass out again.

Seduced83 9

Tuesday 4 June 2013 6:36

Sounds like a Job for sleeperman

jen1682 11

Tuesday 4 June 2013 6:52

My second time skydiving tandem, our lines got twisted. Was crazy scary but I was ready to go again by the time we touched the ground. I bet it would have been pretty scary if you would've woke up as you were free falling to the ground at 100+ mph.

natheitz 23

Tuesday 4 June 2013 8:21

Do it again, you're a pro now

lovely2567 5

Tuesday 4 June 2013 9:17

Why do you need to risk death to have fun? Wtf?

Dr_N1KuF 3

Wednesday 5 June 2013 1:04

Your life is bad, how would you deserve that?

Crystal_da_thing 23

Saturday 25 April 2015 1:53

Ohh come on you serious my first assisted skydive was when I was 8. I didn't faint. Grow a pair

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I agree, your life sucks 58 034

You deserved it 22 061

Today, the guy I've been dating for 3 months told me he doesn't know how he feels about me because he's not excited when we meet and doesn't miss me when we don't text for a while. He decided to tell me this while we were laying in bed right after having sex for the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 204

You deserved it 1 225

The Top

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 087

You deserved it 15 610

Today, as a prank I shook my girlfriend's can of soda. I hadn't noticed that it was already open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 133

You deserved it 53 526

Today, it's my birthday and I celebrated with friends. I now have 34 individual copies of the first Twilight movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 831

You deserved it 1 885

Today, my 8 year-old sister learned how to type her name into a phone using the number keypad. I later found my phone on the kitchen counter with all my contacts under her name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 959

You deserved it 9 830

Today, my boyfriend brought me a bunny for a house present for moving into our first house. She escaped her cage and bit through the electrical wires, cutting out all our power and electrocuting and killing herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 967

You deserved it 2 810

Today, I cleaned up my dog's crap after my wife asked me. 5 minutes later she yelled at me for being lazy as she slammed the door leaving for work. My dog shit in the exact same spot apparently to make me look stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 715

You deserved it 3 721