Today, I went on a trip to Cleveland. After getting lunch, my brother and I started walking back to my car. Halfway there, we were jumped, threatened with a knife, and yelled at to hand over our money. The only thing my brother could do was ask our mugger, "Uh, what gender are you?" FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
What a tool
Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend, when a guy pulled a knife and told us to hand over our money. My boyfriend blurted "I don't have shit, dude! She has tons of cash!" The moment the mugger turned to me, my boyfriend ran away at top speed. FML
Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML
Leg it
Today, someone tried to mug me. I panicked and ran. As they chased me with their knife out, I heard a slip and a shout behind me but kept running. Six blocks later I was spotted, arrested, and held for questioning by the police. The mugger fell, stabbed themselves, and told a cop that I did it. FML
Misunderstanding
Today, as I was walking home, three burly men suddenly began to approach me. Thinking they were going to mug me, I reached for my pocketknife and said, "Stay away, I have a knife." Turns out they just wanted directions to an ice cream shop for their daughters, who were now bawling their eyes out. FML
Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML
Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML
Today, I witnessed an elderly lady getting mugged. I ran over to the guy mugging her and offered him the money in my wallet in return for him leaving her alone. The old lady snatched my money and ran away with the mugger. What the hell just happened? FML
Today, I walked to my local McDonald's. I spent the last 7 dollars I had on my meal. As I began to walk back to my dorm, I was mugged. I explained to them I had no money, so they stole my food. FML
Top comments
Vidrill 22
Your brother is a genius! Trying to distract the knife yielding maniac with a gender identity crisis-inducing question! You are lucky to be alive to write this....
arandomusernameaa 20
Your brother needs to learn to keep his mouth shut...
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Comments (82)
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Well that is a fair question, it will make your report to the police easier. :) Imagine having to say: "well we were mugged by a err, I think human?"
hulopro 16
Seems like he has his priorities in order
Adm_Twigs 19
thats a valid question. also im sure that threw him off so you could disarm him, knives are easier and safer to disarm.
buckdharma 38
Maybe op's brother got aroused during the scuffle.
tweetypie 18
Was the mugger wearing a shirt that said "I'm a girl" while sounding like Barry White?
stryggzy 15
I've lived in Cleveland all my life and this is happened to me also, twice. Couldn't imagine someone taking a trip here for reasons other than business, haha.
ksks1234 33
According to Drew Carey, Cleveland rocks. Do you mean he was lying?
poopface82 25
Drew Carey is, sadly, full of crap. Cleveland does NOT rock.
Deadpool47 23
did he get stabbed next?
owencgray 10
Well... What gender where they?
hellnosucka 27
Hopefully his curiosity did not kill him.
Iloggedout 6
This FML should've stopped at Cleveland.