Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a blind date, meeting up in a park. I got there first and sat down to wait for him. After a while, a guy sat down next to me. I wasn't sure if it was him, so I texted him, asking if he'd arrived. His response was, "I'm already here, sat to the left of the old woman dressed like a gypsy." FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friend set up at a coffee shop. I arrived early, feeling nervous but excited. As I sat waiting, I noticed a person waving at me from across the room. I smiled and waved back, only to realize that they were actually waving at someone behind me. My date never showed up. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by my best friend. When I got there, my "date" was my ex. My best friend knew, and she thought it would be "funny" to see how we would react. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by a friend. Everything was going great until I accidentally called my date by my ex’s name. Twice. My date promptly excused herself to the restroom and never came back. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered, "Fuck it" and left. FML
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Top comments
Alex_DeLarge 0
Even if that wasn't her, did you think insulting somebody would make you look cool?
Callyn 47
You're an ass. Even if she wasn't fat, she probably would have found that offensive. You should've just told her that you were there. If you weren't attracted to her, you aren't obligated to make a second date but you don't have to be rude.
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Comments (237)
Intoxicunt 6
Blind dating is one of those things that make me wonder, "Why did anyone ever think that was a good idea!?" You should have said when you heard the beep, "I have to borrow your phone! I think I'm having a heart attack! NOW!" Then take it, delete her message, and tell her the tingling/tightness just went away. Then ask her if she is your blind date.
Wabodabodayo32 0
nice!!!!
davidomke 0
you are a dick
R4NDR01D 0
i was thinking the same thing...
besad_fml 0
when I was moderating I saw an FML from hervpoint of view. then I read this, and decided to waste a few seconds of everyones life. :)
JohnnyTheFox 0
FYL for getting set up with a fatso. I hope you had the courage to get up and leave, there's only so much you can do for a beached whale anyway.
Jem0_0 0
Fail/Win
DrunkenValor 0
Wow, YDI for being a ****.
HXCxSceneKidx 0
Ahhahahaahhahah dude I'm sorry to laugh but that's reall funny. That reallysucksss, what did you do?! Haha
22jrdn55 15
lmao EPIC FAIL