Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML
Today, a student told me to fuck off. I work with 3 year-olds. FML
Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML
Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids, when a girl in line next to us slipped a hand down her boyfriend's pants and started groping him. I politely asked her to stop, to which she snorted, "Why? Your kids've gotta learn the birds and bees somehow." FML
Today, I was playing with my 3-year-old nephew when he suddenly got up and ran to his mom to tell her I was "touching in bad spots". I was tickling his armpits. FML
Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my girlfriend's family. Her 7 year old brother told me he was feeling sad, so I tried to give him a pat on the back, but it turns out he had a bruise there. He yelled out "don't touch me there!" In the middle of the mall. Now her parents think I'm a pedophile. FML
Today, at the camp that I work at, a little girl asked to "feel" my muscles. Thinking it was cute, I flexed for her. She laughed and said, "No, really." FML
Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML
Today, I was volunteering at the daycare in my area. When this one kid was leaving, he asked his mom, "Why is she so ugly?" FML
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Top comments
DahkLohd 4
Word of advice: don't make those kinds of jokes around little kids. They won't understand!
AgeOfAquariusss 7
Haha kids can really twist your words :D
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Comments (87)
WiseGuy79 14
Way to set the kid straight lol
crystalrain17 14
You need to nip that in the bud, now.
DU0 0
Well, at least he listened to one thing you said: He's doing it to younger and prettier girls. Sucks to be you though. : x
ridikulous 0
hey duo, gtfo!
gabrielleangeliq 0
Well, by the process of elimination, you did. My question is why are you an old ugly intern?
cockoftherock 0
by comparing your comment with the fml you are very stupid.
gabrielleangeliq 0
How so? if she said don't touch old women then he obviously should touch young women.
cockoftherock 0
she JOKINGLY said don't touch UGLY or OLD woman. that implies she is not OLD or UGLY.
Wheredidgrungego 12
We're TEACHING kids to be rapists now? Way to go America.
Anfarwal 10
@15 This happened in SWEDEN.
Rafid 0
15 ur a dumb ass
Kua_Mei 0
Molestation? Sure. Sexual harassment? Definitely. Rape? No. America? Hell no. You are a very confused individual, #15.
denbeste 3
Would be EPIC if this was america (no capital letter!) though :)
novair 5
boobies ewewwwwww!
pacolaca 6
I know... ewwwwww...
swagerific227 0
u shud be ashamed to be a man
FailBear920 19
Icp referrence?
varkey 7
wtf is up with perverted little kids FYL
brunettebabe17 0
So true 15
romano07 0
it's in Sweden..
silentReaper 4
ahhh, i love kids now days. :)