Miscellaneous: Today, I was watching TV with a cup of coffee. My mum asked if...

By Benji - 20/05/2009 19:53 - United Kingdom

Today, I was watching TV with a cup of coffee. My mum asked if I wanted a Mars bar. I said that would be great and she threw one at me, catching me off guard. The Mars bar went straight into my coffee, spilling it over my bare legs. I now have a scald mark on my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 543

You deserved it 7 498

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/11/2010 17:46 - United States

Today, I was drinking coffee out of my favorite mug, when it slipped out of my hand. I caught it, but not before most of the hot coffee spilled all over my lap. In reaction, I dropped the mug again, shattering it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 239

You deserved it 4 253

By mumblingdope - 25/05/2016 08:52 - Indonesia - Jakarta

Today, I decided to have a hot cup of coffee. Then I stumbled on a chair and somehow spilled the hot liquid on my privates. The searing pain worked better to wake me up than the coffee itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 948

You deserved it 1 193

By Bruce - 02/02/2012 03:11 - United States

Today, my son learned that when you slide a mug across the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where you expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 499

You deserved it 3 411

By CoffeeStained - 10/11/2015 15:54 - United States - Richmond

Today, I set my cup of coffee down on the stall floor to take care of my business. A hand reached under the stall door and took my coffee. I yelled to give it back, calling them obscene names. Moments later, my fresh coffee came flying over the door. I'm burned from my head to my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 394

You deserved it 10 129

Thanks, lady

By Anonymous - 12/10/2017 23:15

Today, I made a cup of coffee for a lovely old lady on the dementia ward. She asked for quite a lot of sugar in her drink, but I didn't question it. The moment I gave her the coffee, she threw it all over me. While scalding my skin, it also stuck to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 373

You deserved it 255

Butter fingers

By SplashOuch - 05/01/2010 17:58 - United States

Today, I was walking out of Starbucks when I sneezed, causing coffee to burn my nose. I screamed, dropped it, and sent scorching coffee all over my legs, while dropping everything else I was holding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 945

You deserved it 7 191

For science

By Rach - 26/10/2023 04:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was making some tea for my colleagues when I accidentally dropped the tea bag into my cup of coffee. I thought, "Why not?" and took a sip. It tasted like a caffeinated botanical disaster, and the whole office got to enjoy me retch for 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 206

You deserved it 678

By holyshart - 05/06/2012 09:03 - United States

Today, I walked in on my roommate trying to smoke a Mars bar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 534

You deserved it 2 566

By Rach - 08/06/2010 14:24 - United Kingdom

Today, my cat knocked over a cup of scalding hot tea - but don't worry, the carpet wasn't damaged. It went all over my leg instead leaving a nice big scar for my holiday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 675

You deserved it 4 391

By disheshateme - 18/11/2009 07:03 - United States

Today, it was my turn to do the suite's dishes. I was in the process of drying my roommate's coffee mug when the handle suddenly snapped off and the sharp edge left on the mug scraped down my arm. I now have a 3-inch long gash in my arm. I was attacked by a cheap coffee mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 700

You deserved it 3 980

the_boss_fml 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:09

its not like youll need to be using it, if you still live with your mom

Peanu_theGreat 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:08

... You were naked?

Comments

fml_24seven 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:47

proceeding to make comments is the highlight of my day... i might just proceed to read some more fmls and then proceed to comment them too. fyl btw

Antonio718 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:47

Were you masturbating while drinking coffee?

blehargh 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:49

Maybe he was wearing shorts, and the parts of his legs that were exposed were burned as well as his penis through his shorts. I don't seriously think he was naked with his mom, you guys are the dirty ones for jumping to that conclusion. And #4 is a ******* retard. When did he say he lives with his mom? Maybe he was simply VISITING the person who gave birth to and raised him? Don't you ever visit your mother, you ungrateful asshole? Or maybe he's a teenager who drinks coffee, which isn't unheard of. Don't be a presumptuous dipshit.

newguy12 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:54

careful, mars bars have been known to kill.

Eat_Veggies 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:55

Ouch... maybe you should learn to catch :]

Coocumber 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:55

1-Just because he was holding coffee doesn't mean it was cool enough to drink. 2-You all are retarded for reasons that have already been listed, yet more and more people keep posting the same comment. 3-I have a ******* SCAR on my cooter from hot coffee i spilled on myself when I was ELEVEN YEARS OLD! My point being he may live with his mom because he's YOUNG! Wow I hate everyone

ambur_8 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:58

whats a mars bar?

Silent_Harmony 3

Thursday 21 May 2009 3:01

I've gotten 3rd degree burns from water THREW my clothes when I was 12. Shut up people, get a life, you CAN get burned threw clothes!

Amkii 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 3:02

So..... you had your pants off, right? God, I hope. There's nothing better or healthier for relationships with parents than watching TV nude and eating candy with them.

dance123 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 3:04

I pictured a guy in whitey tighties watching cartoons with his legs crossed, sipping a cup of coffee like a kid. I know your like older and were probably wearing pants. but FYL definately.