Miscellaneous: Today, I was watching TV with a cup of coffee. My mum asked if...

By Benji - 20/05/2009 19:53 - United Kingdom

Today, I was watching TV with a cup of coffee. My mum asked if I wanted a Mars bar. I said that would be great and she threw one at me, catching me off guard. The Mars bar went straight into my coffee, spilling it over my bare legs. I now have a scald mark on my penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 544

You deserved it 7 499

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/11/2010 17:46 - United States

Today, I was drinking coffee out of my favorite mug, when it slipped out of my hand. I caught it, but not before most of the hot coffee spilled all over my lap. In reaction, I dropped the mug again, shattering it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 240

You deserved it 4 254

By mumblingdope - 25/05/2016 08:52 - Indonesia - Jakarta

Today, I decided to have a hot cup of coffee. Then I stumbled on a chair and somehow spilled the hot liquid on my privates. The searing pain worked better to wake me up than the coffee itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 948

You deserved it 1 193

By Bruce - 02/02/2012 03:11 - United States

Today, my son learned that when you slide a mug across the kitchen table, it doesn't stop where you expect it to like in the old cartoons. I then learned what it feels like to have a full mug of hot chocolate spilled onto my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 500

You deserved it 3 411

By CoffeeStained - 10/11/2015 15:54 - United States - Richmond

Today, I set my cup of coffee down on the stall floor to take care of my business. A hand reached under the stall door and took my coffee. I yelled to give it back, calling them obscene names. Moments later, my fresh coffee came flying over the door. I'm burned from my head to my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 395

You deserved it 10 129

Thanks, lady

By Anonymous - 12/10/2017 23:15

Today, I made a cup of coffee for a lovely old lady on the dementia ward. She asked for quite a lot of sugar in her drink, but I didn't question it. The moment I gave her the coffee, she threw it all over me. While scalding my skin, it also stuck to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 376

You deserved it 256

Butter fingers

By SplashOuch - 05/01/2010 17:58 - United States

Today, I was walking out of Starbucks when I sneezed, causing coffee to burn my nose. I screamed, dropped it, and sent scorching coffee all over my legs, while dropping everything else I was holding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 945

You deserved it 7 192

For science

By Rach - 26/10/2023 04:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was making some tea for my colleagues when I accidentally dropped the tea bag into my cup of coffee. I thought, "Why not?" and took a sip. It tasted like a caffeinated botanical disaster, and the whole office got to enjoy me retch for 10 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 208

You deserved it 679

By holyshart - 05/06/2012 09:03 - United States

Today, I walked in on my roommate trying to smoke a Mars bar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 535

You deserved it 2 566

By Rach - 08/06/2010 14:24 - United Kingdom

Today, my cat knocked over a cup of scalding hot tea - but don't worry, the carpet wasn't damaged. It went all over my leg instead leaving a nice big scar for my holiday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 675

You deserved it 4 391

By disheshateme - 18/11/2009 07:03 - United States

Today, it was my turn to do the suite's dishes. I was in the process of drying my roommate's coffee mug when the handle suddenly snapped off and the sharp edge left on the mug scraped down my arm. I now have a 3-inch long gash in my arm. I was attacked by a cheap coffee mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 702

You deserved it 3 981

the_boss_fml 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:09

its not like youll need to be using it, if you still live with your mom

Peanu_theGreat 0

Thursday 21 May 2009 2:08

... You were naked?

Comments

bizz8290 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 22:39

ohhh my ******* god you were naked with you mom there dam i bet you had hard on to.

embob 0

Monday 1 June 2009 12:15

#39, are you still 12? I believe you were burned THROUGH your clothes, not THREW them.

taytaydude 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 4:12

Holy crap dude tyt freaking sucks

cmac86 23

Tuesday 16 June 2009 18:45

Kinky Brits drinking coffee with your mom but naked. Haha- "mum". So, Mr. Powers, what kind of mars bar was it? Twix, baby ruth, snickers?

quizikall 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 17:18

no just a mars bar

chelsaaay 0

Sunday 26 July 2009 21:32

I'm assuming he just had boxers on. Leaving the legs mostly bare, and being of thin material easily burned through by the coffee. Plus its a more acceptable theory. My bros walk around in their boxers all the time.