Love: Today, I was watching a movie. The ending was sad and I started... - FML

By Kiimmy - United States

Today, I was watching a movie. The ending was sad and I started bawling my eyes out. My boyfriend sitting beside me kept looking back and forth between me and the TV, so I asked what he was doing. He replied with, 'I don't know which one is better to watch.' FML

I agree, your life sucks

17706

You deserved it

27001

Tweet

Share

Sorry…

Trip Advisor says no

Workaholic

By Anonymous

Sashay away!

Today, someone called out "Ma'am!" while approaching me from behind, but then said "Oops, sir!" when I turned around. I was wearing a corset and miniskirt with leggings. They were correct the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3674

You deserved it

366

Tweet

Share

By fuckyoutoothen! - 22/7/2020 08:02

Nice victim blaming!

Today, I showed my friend all the dirty messages and dick pics her boyfriend had sent me. I included the ones of me telling him to stop. Instead of being mad at him, she flipped out on me, saying it’s my fault because I “dress too sexy” and he shouldn’t even have my number. He got it from her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2303

You deserved it

160

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Plymouth

Today, my sister offered me a couple doughnuts she bought recently. Thinking she was just being nice, I went ahead and started eating, and was met with the most horrid taste I've ever experienced. Turns out her "recently" was two weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23587

You deserved it

2135

Tweet

Share

By wtf - United States - Delmar

Today, my grandpa took my face in both hands, kissed me on the lips, said "Now you can tell all your friends you've had your first kiss," and walked out of the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks

52892

You deserved it

4960

Tweet

Share

By Somessedup - United States

Today, my boss asked to use my phone since the company pays for it. A few hours later the same boss called me into his office to fire me. Apparently the company checks the phone records and found a call made on my cell to a sex line. My boss made that call and just fired me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

56890

You deserved it

4580

Tweet

Share

By cinemasaddo - United Kingdom

Today, I was let down for a movie date. As I'd already paid for the tickets, I got my narcoleptic sister to come and sit next to me while she slept, so it didn't look like I came on my own. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36539

You deserved it

3520

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous

Today, I came home from a month long vacation to find my house absolutely trashed with a lot of valuable items missing. Burglary? Nope. My dad, who was meant to be house-sitting for me, let the neighbour's teenage son have several parties there in exchange for weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5311

You deserved it

449

Tweet

Share

By Jessie - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1736

You deserved it

276

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was cooking with super hot ghost peppers. The package said "After handling them not to touch your eyes, nose or pets". They should've added "penis" to that list. FML

I agree, your life sucks

14014

You deserved it

61955

Tweet

Share

By satanworshipper - United States - Hollywood

Today, I received another death threat for teaching evolution in college. I'm a geology teacher. FML

I agree, your life sucks

30074

You deserved it

2723

Tweet

Share

By Raven - Canada - Brantford

Today, I went to let my dog inside because she was barking. I saw my neighbour standing at my fence, screaming that she was going to kill my dog with a shovel for barking at her. My dog was only doing it because my neighbor was putting her trash in my garbage bin. This isn't a new thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2142

You deserved it

129

Tweet

Share

By cestquoicebordel?? - France

Today, my fiancée showed me her wedding plans. It will be themed on one of her video games, the best man will be dressed as an alien warlord, and the vows talk about how we'll beat the odds and be blessed by the "Goddess Kalahira". Apparently, I have no say in this. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26777

You deserved it

6171

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous

Today, I caught my 29-year-old brother-in-law scratching his poison ivy with a handful of forks before putting them back in the drawer. I called him on it and he huffed, "You've never said anything before." FML

I agree, your life sucks

3770

You deserved it

314

Tweet

Share

By JSF1234 - United States

Today, I was taking the AP Biology exam. It’s strictly timed, yet my proctor spent 30 minutes (a third of the time we have) talking about his sexual relationship with his wife, who was also proctoring. I don’t know how I did on the test, but I now know my proctor had erectile dysfunction. FML

I agree, your life sucks

65000

You deserved it

3511

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 4/6/2020 17:00

Furry

Today, my boss fired me because someone hacked our website and replaced pictures of our products with furry porn (don’t Google it, it’s weird as fuck). We don’t have an IT department, but since I spend the most time on the computer controlling stock and purchases, he blamed me instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2393

You deserved it

136

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I found out that my best friend is being sacked. He's also about to rent a new apartment which he won't be able to afford when he loses his job. I can't warn him or I'll breach confidentiality and lose my job as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29020

You deserved it

1970

Tweet

Share

By Dariya - United States

Today, I asked my mom how much she had set aside for college. She then looked and me as if I were crazy and said "Why the hell would I do anything like that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

43615

You deserved it

4643

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 18/9/2020 14:02 - Hungary - Sopron

Bittie

Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1532

You deserved it

142

Tweet

Share

By ricard0 - United States - Petaluma

Today, I fell asleep on the couch, only to wake up later with my dog's tongue over my mouth. That was my first ever kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41996

You deserved it

6120

Tweet

Share

By sandyseashells10 - United States

Today, I went to the waterpark and my kids were fighting so I grounded them both. We concluded the day by boogey boarding on a mechanical wave. There was so much water I didn't realize my boobs had completely fallen out of my bikini. As revenge, my kids didn't tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28664

You deserved it

20598

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - Tucson

Today, I got laid off. Walking out of the building, I saw someone on crutches and thought, "Hey, at least I can still walk." Two hours later, I blew out my knee playing basketball. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36925

You deserved it

8120

Tweet

Share

By ChangingTheLocks

Call The Police!

Today, I came home after a long day at work to find the furniture in my living room had been rearranged by my mother-in-law. When asked how she got in, she told us she stole my husband's key and made herself a copy. She can now come here whenever she wants, unless I change the locks. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2074

You deserved it

118

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my girlfriend dumped me via text message. The sad thing is that I left my fiancée of 5 years to be with a girl I worked with at Walmart. My ex-fiancée is now a doctor. I still work at Walmart. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11298

You deserved it

111577

Tweet

Share

By Grandzilla - France - Ablancourt

Today, I got a call from my panicking grandmother. I asked her what was going on, and she explained that, “Godzilla doesn’t work.” Not really understanding, I asked her to clarify. “Yes, you know, Godzilla, to use the internet.” FML

I agree, your life sucks

12672

You deserved it

1137

Tweet

Share

By beekie9 - United States

Today, my mom asked all the old ladies in her church to pray that I meet "someone special". FML

I agree, your life sucks

25169

You deserved it

2213

Tweet

Share

By alternativefacts

Today, I confronted my neighbor because he'd been telling my kids that global warming was a myth. He responded with, "Whine all you want, but the swamp is draining and your bullshit liberal narrative is finally going down." He then dumped his trash on my lawn and retreated to his house. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4838

You deserved it

1188

Tweet

Share

By carl_carl_ - United States - Wichita

Today, I was on a roller coaster behind a boy who vomited in front of me as the cart shot down. It splattered all over my arm, and a little on my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28726

You deserved it

2184

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was flirting with a cute girl at a club. She seemed into me and said I was hot. I said thanks and grinned. I guess my grin looked psychopathic, because her expression turned to horror and she quickly excused herself. That was the only girl who's ever shown any interest in me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23360

You deserved it

2484

Tweet

Share

By greatdriver...4 - United States

Today, I tried to back out of a spot in a parking garage. I did a 12 point turn, hit the car behind me and still didn't manage to get out of the spot. Everyone was staring at me, and the attendant had to come over and move my car for me. I have to park there every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks

11823

You deserved it

26639

Tweet

Share

By facepalm - Singapore

Today, my husband was fired for chatting online for the third time in a month during office hours. Who was he chatting with? Me, telling him to get off the chat programme so he wouldn't lose his job. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28099

You deserved it

12873

Tweet

Share

By monkey2069 - United States - Elgin

Today, a lady handed me a $10 tip on a $45 bill. I was happy with it, since it was more than 20%, until she came back in and said, "I'm sorry I gave you the wrong amount." I handed it back to her and then she gave me a dollar. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51638

You deserved it

4868

Tweet

Share

By britt71411 - United States

Today, inspired by my own relationship, I encouraged my best friend to go after the guy she likes. She did, and I'm now single. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48508

You deserved it

5684

Tweet

Share

By MrsKSB - United States

Today, my boss was watching taser pranks online, when he said he was going to "get me". We often take turns playing pranks on each other, and I was the last to prank him. Now I'm terrified to move or turn my back on anything other than a wall at work. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23256

You deserved it

8501

Tweet

Share

By "BunnysKitty"

Today, per my boyfriend's request, I bought some lingerie. He got so excited when he saw me, he ripped it off me right away. After we were done he used it to clean up. I essentially bought a $40 cum rag. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4920

You deserved it

867

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States

Today, my eye started hurting with unbelievable pain. I couldn't see out of it and I asked my father if he would take me to the hospital, since it was hurting so bad. He said he had to wait for the pizza he ordered for delivery. I had to call a cab to go to the emergency room because of pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48419

You deserved it

3058

Tweet

Share

By foutu - France

Today, while my wife was watching me get undressed she said "Bloody hell, you really are getting a beer belly. And it makes your already tiny willy look even tinier." All her accusations are true. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26604

You deserved it

7678

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - United States - Oakland

Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16576

You deserved it

38183

Tweet

Share

By dedeanne08 - United States - Newark

Today, I received some new snow boots I had ordered online. When I opened the package there was only one boot in the box. FML

I agree, your life sucks

8520

You deserved it

578

Tweet

Share

By blackvogue - Canada

Today, I got up early to prank my family. I put a bucket of ice water on top of a door frame so whoever walked through would get an icy surprise. After I was done, I went back to bed. I woke up groggy and disoriented like always and walked right through the doorway I had rigged. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19395

You deserved it

167741

Tweet

Share

By sigh - United States - Medford

Today, my daughter told me that when she dies, she'd like her ashes spread on her laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27190

You deserved it

3573

Tweet

Share

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By guiltypleasure12 | 0

#1523263 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:03

he's making a joke, what's the big deal.

By SmallTownCutie | 0

#1523267 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:03

haha he's a funny guy(: keep him around.

COMMENTS

By x805xUnknown | 6

#1523255 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:02

Maybe he likes the intensity of your emotions?

Reply

flashback.miss | 28

#1523363 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:13

A dacryphiliac? maybe? I dont know... this is Oo worthy...

Reply

ElOres | 2

#1523427 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:25

Too many negative votes, comment buried. Show the comment

Reply

jakii_ | 0

#1523430 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:25

you entertain your boyfriend
it's all good

Reply

TurtleHabitat | 0

#1523446 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:28

Tuuuurtttllllessss

Reply

1personinthiswor | 0

#1523508 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:38

15....your pic scares me. A lot.

Reply

I_iz_B_a_troll | 23

#1523523 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:41

FUCK.

Reply

jakii_ | 0

#1523536 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:43

20-- he was probably joking. how is he inconsiderate?
and you didn't SEE her cryimg, so you can't claim she's annoying

Reply

Bad_Boy1321 | 0

#1523555 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:51

Omg ik right

Reply

Epilepsy_fml | 0

#1523703 - Saturday 9 October 2010 21:29

YDI for being a lil pussy ass bitch.

Reply

regine22joy | 0

#1523742 - Saturday 9 October 2010 21:38

it's just a joke, chill guys. and 20, you don't know for sure.

Reply

Kyto7884 | 0

#1523963 - Saturday 9 October 2010 23:11

Not an FML. get over it.

Reply

darlinqqbella | 0

#1523966 - Saturday 9 October 2010 23:12

Congratulations, You officially have a deushbag of a boyfriend.

Reply

Thin_Ice_fml | 0

#1523969 - Saturday 9 October 2010 23:14

Big deal. No one cares about the guy who doesn't show feelings about the movie that sucked one way or the other. If someones wasting my time, I'd be annoyed too. YDI op, and get over it.

Reply

darlinqqbella | 0

#1523972 - Saturday 9 October 2010 23:14

Congratulations, you officially have a deushbag for a boyfriend.

Reply

NatDancer2010 | 0

#1524030 - Saturday 9 October 2010 23:32

that's sweet not an fml

Reply

seanders | 10

#1525434 - Sunday 10 October 2010 3:19

84:congratulations you're a retard and can't spell.

Reply

Leke59 | 2

#1525903 - Sunday 10 October 2010 5:56

HAHA i love how #20 is being "inconsiderate."
Damn Hypocrites.

Reply

YDI_Bro | 0

#1526013 - Sunday 10 October 2010 6:41

lol @ seanders

Reply

hairt | 4

#1526114 - Sunday 10 October 2010 7:25

LOL #113

Reply

acethehusky | 0

#2914761 - Sunday 17 July 2011 17:10

...maybe not.

Reply

lexi1337 | 5

#5873974 - Monday 3 March 2014 7:09

Stop being an ass :)

By FootballFreak4 | 3

#1523261 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:02

haha nice

Reply

shreena112 | 0

#1524175 - Sunday 10 October 2010 0:01

ummmm wow?

Reply

jrsl | 2

#1524620 - Sunday 10 October 2010 1:47

uhm you guys are stupid this is a total repeat.

By guiltypleasure12 | 0

#1523263 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:03

he's making a joke, what's the big deal.

Reply

evillittleme | 5

#1525888 - Sunday 10 October 2010 5:50

agreed! I think he was just trying to cheer you up..

Reply

ViiciousDreamz | 0

#1526064 - Sunday 10 October 2010 7:04

omg crying over a movie, loser

Reply

ImCool7 | 0

#1526220 - Sunday 10 October 2010 7:52

exactly. this isnt a fml....

Reply

saladgirl123 | 0

#1535969 - Tuesday 12 October 2010 4:39

i agree

By pilotkev | 5

#1523265 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:03

Totally the crying girlfriend!

By SmallTownCutie | 0

#1523267 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:03

haha he's a funny guy(: keep him around.

Reply

fantita495 | 19

#1526250 - Sunday 10 October 2010 7:59

totally agree!!

By robnunzi | 0

#1523270 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:03

my guess would be neither

By xStiina | 0

#1523301 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:05

Haha, he sounds fun :p

By explosiveskittle | 0

#1523316 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:06

hahahah. how is that FYL?

By ifyouseekamy666 | 0

#1523320 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:06

this is so NOT and fml YDI for making me waste minutes of my life reading this!

Reply

jacketfootball | 0

#1523347 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:09

it took you minutes of your life to read this?

Reply

jacketfootball | 0

#1523396 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:18

oh yeah change you comment and make me look like a dumbass thanks bud

By iRyanJr | 0

#1523327 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:07

Boyfriend win. Don't cry, grow some balls. Not really grow some balls but you get the point.

Reply

elmorous | 0

#1523548 - Saturday 9 October 2010 20:48

yah, that would be gross for him