Today, I was walking whilst texting. I thought I was going in a straight line but I ended up walking right into an open phone booth. A woman was inside making a phone call. I lost my balance, pinning her up against the wall. She thought I was attacking her and clobbered me with the receiver. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was texting while riding my bike (yes, I know, terrible idea). I crashed right into a lamppost, and, even worse, a woman walking by laughed and asked, "Did you just text yourself into that pole?" I just laid there hoping for the ground to swallow me up. FML
Today, to keep my phone safe while I went on some rides, I took it out of my pocket so I could put it in my bag. Just as I pulled it out, a woman ran into me, knocking my phone to the ground and breaking the screen. FML
Today, I was walking down the street when someone started yelling at me, saying I was dead. I bolted, ran into a pole and when they caught up to me, said "Oh, wrong person." and walked off, leaving me bruised on the ground. FML
Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML
Today, I was texting while walking up the stairs to my porch. When I looked up, I saw someone standing behind the porch door, and was so scared that I fell backwards down the stairs. Turns out, it was just my reflection. FML
Today, I was waiting at home for a phone call. While I was in the bathroom, the phone rang. I quickly stopped my business and ran out of the bathroom with my pants round my ankles. I leaped over the couch, tripping and then stubbing my toe while hopping to the phone. It was a telemarketer. FML
Today, I was on a packed bus when my phone rang. I tried to answer, but my wired earbuds got tangled. I tugged too hard, yanking my phone out of my hand. It flew forward, smacked a man in the forehead, then bounced into a stranger’s coffee cup. FML
Today, I was walking down the hallway of my office, texting and not paying attention, when I tripped on… nothing. I just practically face-planted onto the floor, and when I looked up, people chatting in the hallway were staring at me, and asked me if I had tripped over my own foot or if a ghost had pranked me. FML
Today, I was outside at a café when I looked at my phone. As I did, a woman halfway across the patio started screaming at me, demanding I tell her who I was texting and why. She then sprinted over, furious at me for apparently badmouthing her to somebody. All I did was check the time. FML
Today, I got annoyed with my mum stopping in her tracks each time she needed to reply to a text message. I tried to show her that you can walk and text at the same time. I ended up falling into a drain. FML
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Top comments
Moy_fml 6
"Today I was in a phonebooth. This guy came in and started groping me and I attacked him with the receiver. He said: "I'm sorry m'am" and walked off. I'm Superman. FML"
f_alltheirlives 3
Boothycall!
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Comments (95)
Bobskoo 0
Huzzah, it got posted.
Osakhomen 0
Obviously this person is from the UK... "whilst" "receiver"... all things people from the UK says.. also I'm pretty sure they don't have phonebooths in the USA anymore...
ZombieKnickers_fml 8
They don't have phonebooths in America? How strange.
Bobskoo 0
plus "United Kingdom (Peterborough)".
Osakhomen 0
Yeah, we have pay phones on the sidewalks, but not an actually phonebooth.
dave202 0
Edit: sorry I replied to the wrong person
OverEnthusiast 0
...What kind of people have you been hanging out with? People in the US call it a "receiver" all the time, and there are plenty of phone booths in cities and the like, they're just not the adorable stereotypical red ones the UK has in some (most? I dunno) places. Also: watch where you're walking, dumbass.
Blobenshnogen 0
Nope, still a receiver no matter where you are. Osakhomen is probably just toasted or telling the future. They're phasing payphones out here in the States and subsequently nothing put in phone booths, therefore, eventually we won't have phone booths.
sublime93 0
One man doesn't stand for all of us
sublime93 0
Whoops I wasn't suposed to reply to that ^^
morpher910 0
what's with this whole battle of the sex thing? guys are no stupider than girls are, and if they are, it's individual people, not the whole freakin gender. douche bag.
joobie 1
where the **** is there a phone booth anymore?
Sun_Kissed18 25
UK apparently
TulipLuver 0
I did not realize that there were phone booths anymore.
The_Pleb 0
yes there are ******* phone booths? do you all live in outer mongolia
sublime93 0
Lmfaooooo "outer mongolia" lmfaooo
kalseru 0
i live in that city and theres lots of phone booths
f_my_flip_life 5
LOL! I love how OP uses the word, "clobbered". :)
Green12324 0
"Today, I was walking while texting..." YDI.
TheCalendarGirl 5
What, you stop to reply to every text?
ballisticks 0
everyone here seems to be awed at the prospect of phone booths. regarding the comments above, they are not like the red ones you see in 60s dramas, but they are on most city streets
blankslate 0
What is this..."phone booth" you speak of?