By Anonymous - 18/6/2019 06:44
Today, I was in a public toilet taking a dump. I then noticed someone trying to peep under the door, so I kicked them in the head as hard as I could. Turned out it was a 5-year-old looking for his parent. FML
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By  bluejello2001  |  16

How in the fuzzy blue hell did you mistake a small child for a grown adult? Even if all you can see is part of a face, the size and its proximity to the ground is a pretty good hint.

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By  bluejello2001  |  16

How in the fuzzy blue hell did you mistake a small child for a grown adult? Even if all you can see is part of a face, the size and its proximity to the ground is a pretty good hint.

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  chyiochan  |  28

A 5 year old in a new place, even if taught, knowledge goes out the window if they're scared or anxious. Congrats, yours were never in that situation to begin with or they are perfect A+ angels incapable of mistakes! Sure doesn't mean they deserve to have their face kicked in. You'd be singing a different tune if your 5yo was on the floor crying and bleeding; who knows what broken on face. But! Your kids are perfect! And any Kindergartner deserves assault for a mistake! My bad!

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  PhoenixChick  |  26

a) not everyone has kids
b) OP never said their kids, if they had one, were perfect
c) OP clearly didn't know it was a kid and just reacted to someone peeping on them taking a shit
d) The fact that OP is posting here, about how they kicked a kid in the head without realizing it, is pretty clear indiciation that they aren't feeling great about this outcome. Do you think eveyrone who posts on this site is bragging or something?
e) when you have a child, the rest of the world around you does nto suddenly get parenting instincts regarding YOUR child. We don't all tiptoe around our lives just in case your kid does something stupid, we're going to react to situatoins without the filter of "but what if it's a kid!" constantly in our heads. If your child runs up and surprises a recently returned army vet with ptsd, they might get the same reaction anyoen would who does that- and it isn't the vets fault, it's yours for letting your kid bother strangers. If someone's protective reaction is to lash out at someone spying on them on the toilet, it's not their fault that it's your kid.

I'm sorry for the kid, it isn't really their fault, but it isn't OPs either. Watch your kids, people.

By  ojosRojos  |  26

That just seems like a super extreme reaction. How many times have you seen or even heard of an adult literally sticking their heads under a stall door to sneak a peek? Seems like something only a child would do. An adult would try to be more discreet about it. I’d give a verbal warning and in that time I’d take a beat to see who was intruding before literally kicking them in the face.

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  ChibiChibi_fml  |  26

That it doesn't happen often doesn't mean it doesn't happen. I've had teenagers try and slide under the door of the stall I'm in because it "wouldn't open". Well no duh it wouldn't open, I'm in here and said as much. I also once had someone reach under and try and grab my purse in a bathroom so I'm sorry that in this case it was a child but if I was the OP, I would have reacted exactly the same way.

By  Iamthebanzai22  |  11

I remember learning that a reaction is basically a physical action, like screaming, slapping or kicking someone where the decision process bypasses the cognitive part of your brain. I am sure that OP did not see a hair of head under the stall door, haul back, take careful aim and let rip. This was a reaction so the decision about whether it is an adult or not did not take place. It was a perceived threat and the body took over to ensure survival.

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  Zor  |  5

yes! exactly this! people are like "well why didnt you check first" like bitch this is LITERALLY a knee jerk reaction to defend yourself in a perceived dangerous situation.