Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business in the grass and stepped off to the side. I squatted and reached for the bag when my dog spotted another canine. He lunged forward in excitement and I landed face forward in the feces. FML
Today, while walking my dog, I saw a hot guy so I tried to look chill. My dog chose that exact moment to take an enormous dump. I didn’t have any bags. The dude stared while I pretended to check my phone until he walked off. FML
Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he decided to poop in the middle of a crosswalk during heavy traffic. We have very strict laws (and fines) so I frantically tried to pick it up while cars waited, honking and watching me struggle like I was in the worst street performance ever. FML
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML
Today, I stepped in a pile of dog shit. While trying to get it off by wiping my foot on the grass, I stepped in another pile. FML
Today, I was walking my dog and he stopped to take a crap. While he was doing his business, I saw something white coming out of his butt that just wouldn't budge. He started whimpering and I stepped in to help him. I pulled out an entire plastic bag. FML
Today, I came home to find that my dog had taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He'd also taken a dump in my house shoe. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog around the block, I fell in the splits position on wet dirt and ripped my pants right on the front. I then had to walk home casually holding a chihuahua on my crotch hoping I would not run into anyone. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
zingline89 18
"The true test of a man's character is what he does when no one is watching."
NessieMonster188 17
The sweet smell of karma! Oh wait..
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (117)
Xotoolyxo 16
Is it really that hard to pick up after your pet? It has to be better then stepping in it afterwards
Sheerio312 3
Thats a lesson to learn
Obey_StudBoii 23
You forgot that quick huh? Next time pick it up
my_name_is_earl 9
Shit happens butt karma came from the ass and bit you in yours
Hamz1989 13
Looks like next time you will remember to clean that s*** up.
limitedition 25
The universe just sent you a message. next time do the right thing & pick up the poo
j_cat187 19
Shame you didn't trip and fall face first into it.
kawaiisakura 12
This would've been the best form of karma punishment
MaydayParadexx 18
Next time OP doesn't clean up, hopefully that will happen.
AllegroRubato 16
Karma is a bitch.
valerie7188 10
Karmas a bitch
kawaiisakura 12
You're either lazy as hell or just an asshole. It's you're pet, clean up after him/her! It's simple. Grab the bag (you should have with you), pick the poop up, tie it and throw it in the trash. Simple!
kawaiisakura 12
Your* whoops :/