Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother-in-law tried to "accidentally" run me over. FML
Today, Santa ran over my foot with a Segway. FML
Today, I was the victim of a drive-by pissing by some drunken loon on a segway. FML
Today, I was the victim of a drive-by egging by some bastard riding a Segway. He still got away. FML
Today, I was taking a walk, when an elderly lady in a motorized wheelchair slammed into me from behind. There was plenty of room to pass by, but noooo, trying to run me down like a dog, then giving me the finger and yelling "Watch where you're walking!" is so damn preferable. FML
Today, while taking out the trash late at night with my mom, a group of people drove by and decided it would be funny to turn around and chase us up the driveway in their car. Before I even realized what was happening, my mom was already halfway to the house yelling back, "You're on your own!" FML
Today, I was kicking my soccer ball with my father. My mom pulled out in the car without checking and ran into to me. FML
Today, an old lady steamrolled over my foot with her wheelchair, then laughed as she slowly rolled away, leaving my toes in ruins. FML
Today, I attempted a casual jog in my neighborhood. Halfway through, my shoelace snapped, and I tripped, skidding across someone’s lawn. The homeowner rushed out, not to help, but to ask why I was “attacking” their grass. FML
Today, my very drunk mother decided to run down the block naked, screaming at the top of her lungs, "She's trying to kill me!" as I followed behind her in my car, yelling for her to get in. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
TheManager 6
They see her trollin.....
ICastillo 25
Grand theft auto her ass!! Knock her off and take it for a spin.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (94)
spartanMKIV 9
you can't outrun a segway?
Elfkid21 19
who the hell has a segway??
WinterBlue42 22
You'd be surprised. There are a lot of people who do. Also, FYL for the OP. Those things are weapons of evil.
unforgivablecae 7
I think the real tragedy here is that you can't outrun a Segway
vonvaski 18
Your mom surprised me by owning a Segway.
beyslay 14
I think it would be hilarious too