Miscellaneous: Today, I was sitting under a tree at a park. The dirt felt a...

By Wade - 30/05/2009 00:43 - United States

Today, I was sitting under a tree at a park. The dirt felt a little damp, so I assumed it was dew from the night. A homeless man walks over and asks me to move, then starts to pee under the tree, followed by another man. I was sitting in their bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 945

You deserved it 4 678

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Same thing different taste

By minimum wage - 02/04/2012 08:38 - Canada

Today, I walked in on a homeless guy peeing on a turd on the floor of the women's restroom at the park. I'm a janitor for the city. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 341

You deserved it 2 405

By cj1012 - 08/07/2012 03:16 - United States

Today, a homeless man started to wet himself in the recliner at the coffee shop where I work. He then walked all the way to the bathroom, only to finish urinating in a puddle right in front of the bathroom door. Guess who cleaned it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 409

You deserved it 1 870

By jackpot - 09/05/2011 01:53 - Venezuela

Today, I was in a parking lot looking for a spot, and after driving around for a long while I finally found one. A homeless man was taking a shit on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 456

You deserved it 3 020

Nature calls

By Anonymous - 27/03/2023 14:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I was on a first date with a guy I met online. He seemed nice at first, but as we were walking he suddenly stopped and said, "I have to pee." He walked over to urinate on a nearby tree while I awkwardly stood there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 757

You deserved it 155

By gameguy3424 - 18/05/2009 03:37 - United States

Today, I went on my afternoon stroll to my local park. As I reached the park a little boy was peeing in the bushes nearby. His mother called. As I walked by, he turned, still peeing, right to me. He ended up peeing on the front of my pants and on my shoes. My house is two miles away from the park. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 623

You deserved it 3 206

When you gotta go, you gotta go

By Amanda Howard - 15/03/2020 09:00

Today, I came home after being stuck in traffic needing to pee really badly. When I went to the bathroom, my boyfriend was on the toilet. I couldn't hold it longer, so I went into the woods behind our house and found a bush. Relieving myself, my butt started to itch. I was sitting in poison ivy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 570

You deserved it 522

By ugh - 14/06/2011 17:56 - United States

Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 698

You deserved it 3 927

By FUCK.THIS.JOB. - 08/07/2013 05:57 - Finland - Helsinki

Today, I politely asked a man to not sleep on a tram stop that I had to clean. He got up, and while I leaned forward to pick up some trash from the ground nearby, I felt a warm stream on my back. Now I can't get the smell of urine off my clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 047

You deserved it 4 628

Make yourself at home

By Anonymous - 14/03/2010 20:26 - United States

Today, while waiting at the bus stop, the guy standing near me started peeing on the sidewalk and on my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 143

You deserved it 2 505

By Anonymous - 11/03/2010 22:44 - United States

Today, while at the dog park, I suddenly had to use the bathroom really badly. Since there weren't any facilities nearby, I decided to go behind a tree and relieve myself there. While doing this, two other owners, one who's in my math class, noticed me, despite me trying to hide. She definitely saw everything. School will be fun tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 226

You deserved it 26 422

foozebox 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:47

Gross. Hopefully you went straight home after- I'd hate to have people thinking that I peed on myself... or didn't clean myself on a daily basis, etc.

vampirate 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:48

uuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhh how could you not smell it?????????????? shit son

Comments

not1 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:43

hahaha, that is awesome:D

joeh1219 0

Wednesday 17 March 2010 1:50

I wasted the first comment space batches

Jbiebs82 0

Thursday 20 May 2010 2:52

^^^^agreed^^^ SWEET!!!

rockindyl22 0

Saturday 16 July 2011 18:05

That must have pissed you off!

The_Real_Peter 1

Monday 24 October 2011 3:31

^^pun intended^^

BvbArmy_0 18

Thursday 17 July 2014 15:06

Let me guess, OP lives in San Francisco

jengen 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:45

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!! Poor you!

fifafan626 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:46

dude that sucks homeless people can be gross

foozebox 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:47

Gross. Hopefully you went straight home after- I'd hate to have people thinking that I peed on myself... or didn't clean myself on a daily basis, etc.

vampirate 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:48

uuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhh how could you not smell it?????????????? shit son

HeyitsPheddy 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:49

You should team up with the guy below you.

gnitegracie 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:49

I've totally seen that shit before. There's this homeless guy who's always by the park near by house who acts like one of the trees is his girlfriend or something. He's always talking to it, hugging it, or pissing on it. Golden shower FTL

lilpsyco 16

Sunday 16 December 2012 22:05

Hey don't talk about Emma that way me and her have a very very close relationship. Got to love those woodpecker holes

GlobeNinja 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 9:52

**** that! you shud get your assed checked! I would have chundered everywhere

Tehalon 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 10:07

And you didn't smell the great parfume thats called morning urine? YDI.

redbluegreen 40

Saturday 30 May 2009 10:08

Yeah, see, this is why I don't go to public parks anymore. Not really, but that's just gross. I hope you went home immediately, showered, and washed your clothes. I didn't think urine was incredibly fragrant, and people don't really check where they sit in the first place. At least, I don't notice people checking.