Today, I was sitting in my garden and having a cup of tea while watching some dragonflies. I thought the dragonflies were really pretty, so I ran towards them and tried to catch their tails like I used to when I was a kid. They were exotic wasps. Ouch. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I saw a wasp on the ground, apparently injured and unable to fly. It was being mobbed by ants and looked certain to die, so I stamped on the ants to save its life. At this point it sprung up, stung me, then flew off. FML
Today, I tried channeling Mr. Miyagi by catching a fly with my bare hands. It turned out to be a wasp. FML
Today, as I was sitting on my terrace, I was wearing neither bright colors, nor any perfume, yet two bees seemed convinced that I must've been some type of flower and persistently tried to figure out where I was hiding my nectar. FML
Today, I learned what a "pain in the ass" means. I sat down on my patio swing chair, only to discover it was swarming with baby wasps, who stung me all over the butt. Ouch! FML
Today, I was sitting at my college campus; there were good looking girls all around me and I was trying to catch their eye and smile, letting them know I'm available. A butterfly flew by me and I screamed. FML
Today, I was going to set up my air conditioner in the window. As I opened up the window, I must have disturbed a wasp nest, because a dozen wasps flew in and several of them stung me. The rest are now somewhere in my house with my terrified girlfriend. FML
Today, my friend bet everyone at my lunch table that no one could catch the fly that was flying around our table. I reached up and caught it. It was a wasp, and it stung me. FML
Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML
Today, I was stung by a wasp. Startled, I stumbled and grabbed a nearby tree branch to regain my balance. The branch happened to be the location of the wasp's nest, which fell to the ground and split open. The wasps weren't happy. FML
Today, as I was hanging washing out in the sun, a huge cicada flew into my face and somehow got behind my glasses. I screamed and ripped them off and ran away. I came back to a broken pair of VERY expensive glasses. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
scarlett29 0
Ouch... but if its your house how do you not know what kind of bugs there are?
magiczipperman 0
that was smart.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (79)
love_fml_a_lot 0
what kind of tea? special tea ;)
Jonathan33 0
Hi! Billy mays here for oxyclean! if you have a tough stain and don't want the hassle of using bleach, then youre gonna love oxyclean!
Anonymous130_fml 0
I think I love you xD
gothymama 0
LOL! And the first thing that came to my mind when reading this FML: "Sitting in my English garden waiting for the sun, if the sun don't come you get a tan from standing in the English rain!" ... Did I just steal replys_with_lyrics' job?
Intoxicunt 5
You do it well. Good one. :) Damn it, now that song will be in my head all night.
Sweet_Instance 0
whoops
eliz3 0
***** on the dragonflies/wasp, you deserve it.
sch1ll 0
wtfffffff! cant u tell the difference, dumbass!?
dELiA14 0
moron. :)
ktg_6172 0
Who the **** sits in their garden and drinks tea?
xenomorph 0
Many people do. People often associate it with England, but in reality, it can happen anywhere. Anyway, -1 for disrespect.
jhon316 0
alot of people dumb ****
Bilbotitface 2
erm ye my family drink tea in summer often in the garden my friends nd thier families drink tea IN THE GARDEN AT SUMMER Yes i am english XD BTW i sappose thts just unlucky but i would prefer to atch them than scare them away
SunnySkyline 0
That's me! :)
stupidfaceman 0
dam