Love: Today, I was rubbing my dog's belly. He seemed to be enjoying...

By Noname - 09/03/2009 17:04 - Canada

Today, I was rubbing my dog's belly. He seemed to be enjoying it, his penis "came out". My boyfriend was walking by and said "at least you turn someone on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 326

You deserved it 8 679

Love

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Kinda sus

By Anonymous - 10/06/2016 14:28 - Canada - Montréal

Today, I was rubbing my dog's belly. My wife came in and thought I was jerking him off. She wouldn't believe my explanation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 700

You deserved it 1 125

By aXel - 13/10/2008 08:29

Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 723

You deserved it 8 309

Woof woof

By kjdhfakjs - 20/05/2010 18:32 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he started pretending he was a dog. This included barking, licking my face, and scratching his ears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 414

You deserved it 6 697

By Anonymous - 13/09/2012 05:30 - Canada - Campbell River

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It would have been a lot sexier had our chihuahua not decided to rim his ass as he thrust into me, causing him to break out into a case of the giggles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 137

You deserved it 5 381

By Puppy Loverr - 25/08/2011 07:12 - Australia

Today, I was getting a bit intimate with my boyfriend. Just when things were getting interesting, my dog managed to get into my room. He jumped on the bed and my boyfriend spent the next 20 minutes playing with the dog, while I sat next to him, half naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 420

You deserved it 4 836

Doggy style

By failuretolaunch2 - 26/02/2015 03:31 - United States

Today, my boyfriend managed to orgasm by humping my leg. I'm beginning to think I'm dating a puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 539

You deserved it 4 890

Bad boy

By a-non - 02/02/2009 15:57 - United States

Today, I realized that the dog humping my leg was the most action I've gotten in months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 070

You deserved it 8 208

By woof woof?? - 15/06/2013 20:26 - Canada - Sherwood Park

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he discovered that if he hits a certain area just right, my leg starts shaking like a dog. Now he won't stop patting my head and saying, "Who's a good girl?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 914

You deserved it 10 003

By Anonymous - 28/08/2018 06:00

Today, my boyfriend's dog, which he got even though he knew I was allergic, literally got in between us while we were having sex. He didn't stop and got mad when I did. Now I'm itchy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 993

You deserved it 344

By GiveADogABone - 15/10/2015 22:47 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were trying to get it on on the bed. As soon as things were starting to get heated, I turned over and saw that my dog had not only jumped up on the bed, but had been watching and started to hump the pillow next to our heads. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 022

You deserved it 3 506

greenfairy_fml 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 0:31

you should have said "at least someone can get it up"

Yunie_fml 0

Monday 9 March 2009 23:02

Nice guy. Been together long?

Comments

greenman_fml 0

Monday 9 March 2009 22:51

wow, you must really struggle. i'm sorry ;)

kmknotek 0

Wednesday 1 September 2010 5:44

you look like a creeper bro

sunshyne84_fml 0

Monday 9 March 2009 22:54

lmao

Philosophic 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 21:30

RESPONSE: "Nobody's as good at turning people on like your mom, sorry."

browneyedgirl 0

Monday 9 March 2009 22:57

tell him: "right back at you"

izzy21_fml 0

Friday 23 July 2010 9:20

eww but then that would kinda mean that the dog turns her on idk forgive me I js confused myself even more -.-

spade1997 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 8:26

3 tht would make no sense

Yunie_fml 0

Monday 9 March 2009 23:02

Nice guy. Been together long?

zacharyhaer 0

Thursday 22 September 2011 5:39

Lol

rcbarnes 24

Saturday 25 February 2012 10:30

More importantly, why stay together?

firearmada 0

Monday 9 March 2009 23:06

Now do you do anything with your BF? or i would say that if my GF did not "play" with me.

ajdc24 0

Monday 9 March 2009 23:08

and why is he still your boyfriend?

dwights 0

Monday 9 March 2009 23:11

HAHAHAH #3 is ftw.

howdidithappen 0

Monday 9 March 2009 23:27

Hahahah...clever guy.

lolwot 0

Monday 9 March 2009 23:28

LOL

Kzee 0

Tuesday 10 March 2009 0:06

How do you get so many posts on here?

Keywords

Party Awkward Music Education Love Exams Students Kids Jealousy Animals Dogs Work Embarrassing Annoying Coffee Scary Geek Boredom Fire Scams Break-ups Cheating Intimacy Sex Health Alcohol Relatable AITA Family Wake up

The Top

Today, I was dismissed because of my company's strict "no drugs" policy. Yesterday, I had a talk with my team leader and confessed that I have to take antidepressants; this arse then reported it to the management, and they fired me because they are not aware of what these pills contain, and it could affect my performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 754

You deserved it 114

Today, I got to my log cabin after an hour's hiking. I lit the fire because it was freezing and my stupid dog sniffed the fire, looked me in the eye, then jumped right into the fire and knocked the logs everywhere. My cabin is now ashes and I had an hour's hike back to my car with my stupid dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 507

You deserved it 150

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 2 661

You deserved it 225

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I agree, your life sucks 32 754

You deserved it 3 153

Today, I went to a pet store to adopt a dog. I got a medium sized lab, a dog crate, and a few toys, then put his crate in the back of my truck and the dog in his crate. On the way home I realized I forgot dog bowls and some dog food. I went back, and when I got back out to my truck, my dog was gone. My stereo too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 095

You deserved it 8 686

Today, while finishing up raking leaves, I decided it would be a fun idea to jump into them. After rolling around in the leaves for a bit, I smelled something funny. Turns out I was rolling around in dog shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 412

You deserved it 38 089

Today, I overheard my mother Skyping with her new "boyfriend" about the $1,000 she just sent him. She barely knew what internet dating was three weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 143

You deserved it 3 614

Today, on the drive to church, I got a nosebleed. Not so bad, until I sneezed and splattered myself and my fiancé with blood, snot, and eventually tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 743

You deserved it 4 728