Today, I was riding my newly trained horse. I've recently been suffering from bad gas, and ended up farting so violently, it spooked my horse into bucking me off and running away. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML
Today, I was riding a new horse when a lawnmower starting up spooked her. She jumped straight up in the air and I landed directly on the saddle horn. I can't walk or feel anything between my legs. FML
Today, I was at a rodeo warming up while my mom unnecessarily bragged about my training skills to a client. My horse then threw me into a gate at a full gallop, in front of everyone. That was the first time he'd ever misbehaved. FML
Today, not only did my horse step on my foot & refuse to move, he also took the opportunity to crap on my other foot while I was incapable of moving. FML
Today, I went horseback riding with this guy I like. I asked him to help me get on the horse. I slipped, and while trying to keep my balance, I kicked him in the face. FML
Today, my idiot horse decided to grab a mouthful of stinging nettles while I was riding him. He panicked at the burning sensation in his mouth and bucked me off. Don't worry, though, my fall was cushioned, by the nettles. FML
Today, I saw the girl that I've had a crush on forever riding her horse on the side of the road. She waved, and without thinking, I honked my horn in response. Her horse bucked her off. FML
Today, I was putting my horse away into her pasture, when I slipped in the mud. In a haisty attempt to support myself, I grabbed the electric fence in on hand, and my horse with the other. The shock from the fence traveled through me to her, sending her running and leaving me with 2 broken teeth. FML
Today, I was thrown from a horse. Thankfully, there was a trainer there to break my fall and prevent serious injury. Instead of being concerned for my safety or even grateful, my boyfriend flew into a rage that the trainer’s hands had brushed my breasts while saving me. FML
Today, my dad tried to help me overcome my intense fear of horses (due to nearly being killed by one as a child) by taking me to a ranch. Within 30 minutes, a horse bit my face. FML
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Top comments
wangwong 8
Hey, you would run away too if the horse sat on you and started farting
staychill 16
Gas does make your transportation move faster!
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Comments (47)
nightfall8705 33
I laughed at this so much harder than I should have.
Hop6e 22
You poor thang.
captainsmegma 12
I can relate to the horse. The misses did the same while riding me and got bucked off as well.
cjfred 13
The horse probably wasn't spooked; he was pissed, and thinking "Oh *hell* no!" How would you like it if somebody sat on your back and farted on you? (That was a rhetorical question; if you'd enjoy it, I don't want to know.)
lenalee96 22
this is why when riding a green horse I always warm them up to me making strange and violent noises both on the ground and under saddle before I allow myself to do something like sneeze or fart
sarriemeow 2
Having a human on their backs does damage to horses' anatomical structure. I'm sure I the long run the horse will be much more hurt than you were from falling.
DemonBoy1988 22
Seems your horse refuses to take any shit from you