Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
What a cozy moment
Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML
Today, around 2:00 a.m. I had just sat down on my couch when I noticed one of my cats poking at what appeared to be a toy. I attempted to pick it up to play with the cat when it started to move like a mouse. I squealed like a girl and woke up my wife upstairs. I'm a 26-year-old man. FML
Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML
Sobering
Today, I made my way to bed around 4am after spending all night hanging out with my family. When I got to my bed, I started to clear a spot to lay down. Almost immediately, my hand touched something furry and cold and, fearing the worst, I turned the light on. Turns out my cat left me a half eaten rodent. FML
Today, I was awoken at 1:30 a.m. by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML
Earplugs
Today, at around 12 a.m. I went to bed, happy that I get to sleep in because I had nowhere be in the morning. Sadly that came to an end when I woke up around 7 a.m. to my mom coming home and screaming because she saw a mouse. FML
Strange noise
Today, I was awoken at 1:30am by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML
Law and order
Today, at the age of 20, I still have a bed time. It is strictly enforced by my cat via endless meows if I am up past 11 pm. FML
Today, I was playing a video game that required me to hunt a few animals. My mom walked in, saw what I was doing, then went into her psycho vegan mode and started yelling at me. She basically grounded me for "murdering" pixels on a screen. FML
Today, I realized that the only one willing to hang out with me this summer is my guinea pig. FML
Top comments
xoxoemmers 4
Rodents do know best
lovelydarlings 6
Guinea pigs need sleep too!
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Comments (341)
fogrunner 13
Let your piggy get some rest. And if you've only got one, please get her/him a guinea pig buddy. They're not wired to be solitary (kind of like most humans wouldn't be satisfied having only guinea pigs for company, I guess).
zeldaluvr2007 15
Ditch the pig and get a capybara! Life-size guinea pigs ftw. :P too bad they don't sell them as pets. :)
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
Self absorbed Toronto: stuck up money-obsessed assholes inhabiting a cold, heartless and ugly city. Totally unfair, that only describes like 20% of the city. It has some great neighbourhoods, thriving arts scenes, and lots of great parks. Also, there are plenty of friendly people there. Ontario is full of red-necks who worship at the alter of Mike Harris (ex-premiere who would have been adored by Bill O'Reilly), except for Toronto which is elitist and stuck-up and self-centered but also liberal (kind of like New York). Torontonians are also cold and mean, and (as noted above) everyone is required to wear suits all the time and no is allowed to have coloured balloons -- except for the bits of Toronto which are dangerous and filled with violent but colourful gang shootouts. 312-your assuming a lot of OP. It was never stated that he/she is an "avid gamer". Correct me if I am wrong, but I believe the FML stated that he/she was playing video games "at 2am" not "until 2am" so you can not conclude that he/she doesn't have a job/life because it was not stated that gaming was a major part of their evening or day. Furthermore, the FML is stated in a way that shows unsettled emotions about the rodents screeching so that indicates it isn't a nightly occurrence. I think it is safe to say this is the first time OP has experienced this FML, if it wasn't it would have been apart of the FML because it makes it mire of an FML. I believe the stereotype of "avid gamers" is that they play games all night, never leave the couch, have no job/car, live with mom and dad, have no life other then gaming, etc. OP already doesn't fit the stereotype, why would you assume the rest is true for this "avid gamer"? Now let's take a look at your stereotypes, shall we? Your from Toronto so you must believe the world revolves around you, suck and any and all sports, be a horrible driver, money obsessed,want-to-be elitist, stuck-up, whom freezes in weather below 60 degrees. Oh, and you must either always wear black/white shades of suites or are always in gang colors, but chances are you are an accountant, both of your parents were accountants, and their parents were accountants whose parents were also accountants. Does that fit you? Probably not. Now let's look at me. I am Irish and although I have tried alcohol I absolutely hate it and refuse to consume it. I live in Texas but I would not wear a cowboy hat or boots to save my life, the last word I would call people is y'all, I HATE the heat and desperately want to move to colder weather, I do not have a southern accent(thank god, sorry to offend the southerners it just wouldn't go well with my voice I am sure it does with yours) I would not shoot a gun if you paid me, I am a vegetarian and I hate fried foods, i don't eat cornbread/gravy/ranch/etc and the only time I have ever seen cacti is in Arizona. Stereotypes are not always true. If you think they are then yes, you are ignorant because you choose to believe in something you know doesn't completely apply to you. And lastly, I never meant to insult you only to point out your flawed beliefs but you purposely insulted OP so why would it matter to you if I did insult you anyway? You have no problem speaking it so you have to be ready to take it too. If you want to insult me like the other ignorant teenager then go ahead, take your best shot. It doesn't bother me a bit. In fact, I appreciate it because it makes me a better person to know how I come across to people.
hayleclark 17
I would like to point out that my comment was actually directed at #38, not at OP. I never stated that I believed that OP was an avid gamer, I was simply giving my reply to #38, who asked why such stereotypes are often applied to gamers. Perhaps my answer was an over exaggeration, I admit. Not every gamer fits the typical stereotype, but in my experience many do, which is why I applied it to my answer. My comment was more geared towards people who deny that they have a lack of a social life even though they play video games for at least 6 hours on a daily basis. I apologize to the people with a regular, genuine appreciation of video games who I may have offended. And to Mean_Mr_Mustard, you're correct, I don't fit any part of your stereotype. I don't even know what gang colours are, I have never worn a suit, and I'm an artists, I'm not even related to an accountant. But I know many who do fit that stereotype. Stereotypes aren't applied on a personal basis, they are applied to the majority. And it happens with everyone and every community, so no one should have been surprised by my answer, because it's true for a lot of people, and no one can deny that.
hayleclark 17
I would like to point out that my comment was actually directed at #38, not at OP. I never stated that I believed that OP was an avid gamer, I was simply giving my reply to #38, who asked why such stereotypes are often applied to gamers. Perhaps my answer was an over exaggeration, I admit. Not every gamer fits the typical stereotype, but in my experience many do, which is why I applied it to my answer. My comment was more geared towards people who deny that they have a lack of a social life even though they play video games for at least 6 hours on a daily basis. I apologize to the people with a regular, genuine appreciation of video games who I may have offended. And to Mean_Mr_Mustard, you're correct, I don't fit any part of your stereotype. I don't even know what gang colours are, I have never worn a suit, and I'm an artists, I'm not even related to an accountant. But I know many who do fit that stereotype. Stereotypes aren't applied on a personal basis, they are applied to the majority. And it happens with everyone and every community, so no one should have been surprised by my answer, because it's true for a lot of people, and no one can deny that.
kdrizzle1996 0
you're 20 years old and you have a guinea pig...
giggles090892 1
How about you cover the guinea pig's cage and mute your T.V. or computer (or invest in headphones). Or put the cage in another room. I feel like this is easier than we're making it...
satans_babe13 0
I know the feeling!! Guinea-pigs are a pain! Although You have quite a videogame addiction problem if you're still playing at 2 am XD
dkrmaniac 0
I love guinea pigs
guineapiggle 3
this is why i dont let my guineapig sleep in my room