Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to a squeaking noise and the feeling of something furry on my cheek. I smiled, thinking it was my guinea pigs nosing me awake. Then I remembered that my guinea pigs were in their cage on the other side of the room, and opened my eyes to see the biggest rat ever staring right at me. FML
Today, around 2:00 a.m. I had just sat down on my couch when I noticed one of my cats poking at what appeared to be a toy. I attempted to pick it up to play with the cat when it started to move like a mouse. I squealed like a girl and woke up my wife upstairs. I'm a 26-year-old man. FML
Today, my daughter's guinea pig got stuck behind the wardrobe, squeaking its head off. I tried pulling the wardrobe towards me to free him, but couldn't take the weight of it all, so it fell over, smashing the TV. The guinea pig is fine. FML
Today, I made my way to bed around 4am after spending all night hanging out with my family. When I got to my bed, I started to clear a spot to lay down. Almost immediately, my hand touched something furry and cold and, fearing the worst, I turned the light on. Turns out my cat left me a half eaten rodent. FML
Today, I was awoken at 1:30 a.m. by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML
Today, at around 12 a.m. I went to bed, happy that I get to sleep in because I had nowhere be in the morning. Sadly that came to an end when I woke up around 7 a.m. to my mom coming home and screaming because she saw a mouse. FML
Today, I was awoken at 1:30am by a strange noise, and something tugging on my hair. I opened my eyes, to find a very large rat sitting on my pillow, chewing my hair. FML
Today, at the age of 20, I still have a bed time. It is strictly enforced by my cat via endless meows if I am up past 11 pm. FML
Today, I was playing a video game that required me to hunt a few animals. My mom walked in, saw what I was doing, then went into her psycho vegan mode and started yelling at me. She basically grounded me for "murdering" pixels on a screen. FML
Today, I realized that the only one willing to hang out with me this summer is my guinea pig. FML
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Top comments
xoxoemmers 4
Rodents do know best
lovelydarlings 6
Guinea pigs need sleep too!
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Comments (341)
alexFYL 11
Oh please. My job, birds and dogs dictate my bedtime. It's called growing up.
Ace131313 1
What was that second achievement? Used to be the defensive captain? USED TO BE?
hayleclark 17
I realize that I also have stereotypes, I'm not in fact ignorant. Every avid gamer I know plays at the expense of having a real life, one of them even dropped out of school. So unless you can prove me wrong, there's no reason to insult me for expressing that in general I believe that the stereotypes are true.
xX_LilSammie_Xx 4
My cats do the same thing
maspembo 0
You must be blonde because that was really stupid now that stereotype is true
Cigar 11
Try covering the part of his cage facing your monitor or providing him with extra dark huts to go rest.
Happiness2Joy 3
Just like living with a mother again
ihasbrains 10
Well most stereotypes are true to an extent. They just don't apply to every single person in a community, it just seems like they do.
wannbaussiegurl 4
um if your playing video games that late. or early wow... you have no life so yes I agree with your rodent
JayD17 0
That's what I have to do with my snake - he flips if the light is on past 9pm. How would you like it if someone turned your "sun" on at 2 in the morning? It'd be terrifying - screw up your internal clock and whatnot.