By Anonymous - United States - Titusville Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML I agree, your life sucks 39084 You deserved it 3500 99 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By aziraphaleelle - United States - San Jose Today, I had to wave my arms like a maniac as I sat on the toilet at work, otherwise the faulty motion sensor/timer would turn the lights off after about ten seconds. I've had to do this for several days now. No one else has reported this problem, so management won't get it fixed. FML I agree, your life sucks 38055 You deserved it 4341 73 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By highlycontagious - United States Today, while walking through the fragrance area in a shopping center a women behind me asked; "Excuse me miss, would you like to sample our new fragrance line." I'm a 19 year old male. I turned around expecting her to correct herself. She didn't. FML I agree, your life sucks 42097 You deserved it 6692 49 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Noname - United States Today, I found an old dress in my house laying around. I decided to dye it green to wear it out on St. Patrick's day. Turns out it was my grandmother's wedding dress that my sister was planning to wear for her wedding. FML I agree, your life sucks 41196 You deserved it 179439 218 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Los Angeles Today, a cute, new guy I always run into at work hit on me. Turns out he's only 18. I'm old enough to be his mom. FML I agree, your life sucks 30229 You deserved it 4020 109 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By laterchoice - United States Today, my girlfriend informed me that she is still in love with the guy she cheated on me with. She admitted that she would be willing to do anything with him if he wanted to. And, "He's a better kisser too." FML I agree, your life sucks 36084 You deserved it 5251 133 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By artsmart1 - United States Today, I went to go see a specialist for my prostate and was told he would have to do an exam before I could leave. Having had this checked just the previous year, I was more than a little irritated. As I was bent over the table the Dr. said, "Now, just pretend I'm Angelina Jolie." FML I agree, your life sucks 28250 You deserved it 2912 147 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Ew?Really? - United States - Montrose Today, my husband was disgusted by me expressing breast milk while we were in the shower together. This is the same man who thinks it's funny to pee on my legs because, "It'll wash off." FML I agree, your life sucks 47960 You deserved it 4966 105 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Off_Road - United States - North Pole Today, while on the highway, a guy in a truck sped up to pass me. He was hauling a trailer, which hit me and ran me off the road. I called the cops and followed him all the way into town, where the cops pulled him over. They let him go without even a ticket, because, "He didn't know he hit you." FML I agree, your life sucks 50374 You deserved it 3993 146 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By WTFwhywouldyoudothat - United Kingdom Today, my house got broken into. Thankfully they didn't steal anything. They did, however, move things around into strange places and mess up my underwear. I have severe OCD, so this is probably worse than if they had taken everything. FML I agree, your life sucks 31937 You deserved it 4345 154 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By spitstopper - United States - Birmingham Today, I stopped two little boys from spitting over a railing at the piano player two floors below in the department store I work at. Their mom complained to my boss about me. FML I agree, your life sucks 43504 You deserved it 3075 63 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By superficialheart - China Today, while riding back from a weekend away with my boyfriend, we crashed his motorbike, resulting in us getting thrown over a barbed wire fence into a forest. I woke up in hospital. Apparently, in his adrenaline rush, he climbed back on his bike and continued his trip, forgetting all about me. FML I agree, your life sucks 41308 You deserved it 3236 164 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By wiifantcso - United States - Sturtevant Today, my sister was upset because she felt like no one liked her. Without thinking, I replied, "It's okay. If I acted like you, people would probably hate me, too." This sounded sympathetic in my head. FML I agree, your life sucks 37964 You deserved it 24037 87 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I got rear-ended at a stop sign on a seldom used road in my neighborhood. As I open my car door to trade insurance information with the guy, he backs up a little and speeds away, taking my car door with him. FML I agree, your life sucks 36507 You deserved it 2170 49 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lonely - United States Today, I went over to my boyfriend's house. After asking him what was wrong due to his weird attitude, he responded with, "This isn't working; I'm in love with my sister." FML I agree, your life sucks 71595 You deserved it 4506 194 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By offended - United States Today, I was putting the finishing touches on my portrait of a young boy in art class. I asked my teacher if she could help correct the bad parts of my portrait. She said, "Well that would take all day and I just don't have the time." She was serious. I thought this was my best work yet. FML I agree, your life sucks 60140 You deserved it 5113 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fml - Canada Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how much I loved him. His answer? "Less lovin' more humpin'." This happens every single time. FML I agree, your life sucks 27727 You deserved it 30436 198 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I realized that as a result of working in an office which has an oddly-placed window, the direct sunlight has caused the left side of my face to become significantly darker than the right. Just call me Harvey Dent. FML I agree, your life sucks 32780 You deserved it 3813 47 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Rugby Dating is hell Today, I had my third date with a lovely guy. After I got home, I figured I'd try to see if I could find his Facebook profile. I did. His pictures were nice; lovely wedding photos for sure, and his newborn baby is adorable. FML I agree, your life sucks 61349 You deserved it 5186 135 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Kyrstin Budd Today, I noticed a lady at work staring at me very intently. When she realized she had my attention, she made a sweeping gesture over her head and said, "Hair is like Trump!" FML I agree, your life sucks 3783 You deserved it 487 7 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Cold&Soaked Today, I set my alarm and got up early to view the Super Blue Blood Moon. I was all wrapped up in a blanket and had a perfect view from my backyard. It’s been a truly amazing experience, made even more exciting by the sprinklers turning on. FML I agree, your life sucks 3744 You deserved it 795 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my wife decided to check her email, while I was still inside her. FML I agree, your life sucks 66142 You deserved it 13124 118 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By jenjam Today, I bought a home at a bargain. It will need 5 grand in repairs to fix plumbing and electric, but it's mine. When I pulled up the listing to show pictures to my friends, there was a new listing that was in the same neighborhood, and a larger, nicer house that is move in ready. Same price. FML I agree, your life sucks 29031 You deserved it 5745 78 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By iwantaraise - Australia Today, while on the job as a cop, I was breaking up a loud house party. We were just doing one final check of the house, we walked into the bathroom to find a kid furiously wanking in the bath. This isn't the first time I've seen something like this. FML I agree, your life sucks 29157 You deserved it 3036 55 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 20/1/2021 22:59 Real life Today, I found out that my boyfriend of 16 months has had an "internet-only" girlfriend since before we got together, but she wasn't ever "real" to him, so he didn't think it would get in the way. FML I agree, your life sucks 779 You deserved it 81 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Madison Gliosci Today, I’m spending my 21st birthday in the hospital getting a colonoscopy and endoscopy. Happy birthday to me. FML I agree, your life sucks 2835 You deserved it 196 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By karmaaa - United States - Huxley Today, I was driving with my grandma and she was going 30 over the speed limit. To slow her down, I said, "Hey look, the police". She slammed on the brakes so hard I hit my head on the dashboard. FML I agree, your life sucks 35755 You deserved it 17680 86 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Ugly - Netherlands Tough Love Today, during a conversation with my in-laws, I opened up about my insecurities concerning my looks. My mother-in-law responded, "But you're not beautiful." She then repeated it. FML I agree, your life sucks 4992 You deserved it 470 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Lovesucks - United Arab Emirates - Dubai Is she better than me? Today, I found out my boyfriend, who is buying me a ring for my birthday is buying my best friend a ring that cost 10 times more than mine. FML I agree, your life sucks 2721 You deserved it 249 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By my back hurts - Australia - Campbelltown Today, I spent a large portion of the afternoon playing hide and seek with the door-to-door salesman who saw me sneak in the back door and won't stop knocking. No amount of hiding behind the couch will make him go away. FML I agree, your life sucks 40488 You deserved it 7403 131 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By scarred for life - United States - Carmel Today, I realized my recent weight loss probably wasn't caused by working out and eating more healthily. It was from the tapeworm I discovered hanging out my ass after I took a crap. I had to pull it out with my bare hands. FML I agree, your life sucks 18364 Phew, glad it wasn't me 4033 92 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By full of losses - United States Today, the day after my grandfather's funeral, my grandmother informed me I have 30 days to move out. I've been living with them for four years, helping take care of my sick grandfather. She's already changed the locks and won't unlock the door. FML I agree, your life sucks 4403 You deserved it 412 25 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 23/12/2020 06:57 - United Kingdom - Boston Stuck Today, I found out that the badly-parked car without MOT, that I chose not to report, has been moved and now blocking my car in. I need to get to the shops and have no idea who the driver is. FML I agree, your life sucks 648 You deserved it 128 1 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ciotter - United States Today, my cat sneezed directly into my open eyeball. FML I agree, your life sucks 30520 You deserved it 5373 98 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Lemont Today, my mom's obsession with cleanliness hit a new low when she bitched at me for having trash in my trash can. FML I agree, your life sucks 34820 You deserved it 2438 53 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Australia - Brunswick Today, I ran into a new guy at work who told me the regional manager was visiting today to evaluate the staff. I scoffed and said that everything I'd heard about the manager made him seem like a total prick. His reply? "Maybe, but I'm a prick who can FIRE people." FML I agree, your life sucks 10268 You deserved it 27004 46 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By 3hoursleftofwork - United Kingdom - Milton Keynes Today, the magic of witnessing a sheep giving birth was ruined for me when I slipped and fell in the puddle of birth fluids. FML I agree, your life sucks 28664 You deserved it 5323 138 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By hairycarrie - 28/8/2020 04:49 - United States Splitting hairs Today, although the I’ve always kept my pubic hair neat and trimmed, my boyfriend once again complained that I don’t shave. When I told him that shaving is uncomfortable and risks ingrown hairs, he sulked and said, “But it’ll look so much better!” He needs to lay off the porn. FML I agree, your life sucks 1933 You deserved it 491 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By halfie - United States - Pigeon Forge Today, while on my first ever date, I ordered a really hot curry, hoping to impress my date. "Yeah," I said smoothly, "not everyone can handle spicy food." When I took a bite, my eyes watered, my mouth burned, and I had to plead for water in between moaning like a dying baboon. FML I agree, your life sucks 10499 You deserved it 33208 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom - Loughton Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I sneezed so hard that my head shot forward and smashed against his, sending his head backwards against the wall. He ended up with a concussion, and I still feel like someone hit me over the head with a chair. FML I agree, your life sucks 28701 You deserved it 3807 35 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Norwalk Today, my thirteen-year-old daughter tried to scratch the freckles off of her face. We ended up going to the hospital. FML I agree, your life sucks 27690 You deserved it 2697 152 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By newyorkcityguy | 9 #6202736 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:22 At least he wasn't busy selling 1.2 million dollars worth of meth. Send a private message 422 13 Reply
By Mossygirl357 | 12 #6202734 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:21 Congratulations on your baby girl. Send a private message 344 5 Reply
By manateesarecool | 13 #6202731 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:20 On the bright side, you have a kid now! Send a private message 23 84 Reply
Reply ohSNAPyall | 26 #6202739 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:22 Irrelevant. Send a private message 58 13 Reply
Reply mrmcleod | 29 #6202929 - Sunday 15 February 2015 4:13 Is it? Send a private message 16 14 Reply
Reply ohSNAPyall | 26 #6202931 - Sunday 15 February 2015 4:15 Yes. OP would have had a kid now whether or not her husband had flirted with a nurse. Send a private message 29 6 Reply
Reply mrmcleod | 29 #6202936 - Sunday 15 February 2015 4:21 But the bright side of the situation is that she is now holding a beautiful baby girl. I don't know, it's part of the FML, I fail to see the irrelevance. Send a private message 28 6 Reply
By Mossygirl357 | 12 #6202734 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:21 Congratulations on your baby girl. Send a private message 344 5 Reply
By newyorkcityguy | 9 #6202736 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:22 At least he wasn't busy selling 1.2 million dollars worth of meth. Send a private message 422 13 Reply
Reply forsaken_ones | 9 #6202741 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:23 I kinda wanna hear the story behind this comment Send a private message 19 57 Reply
Reply turquoisee_fml | 12 #6202744 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:25 #5, I'm pretty sure that was just a breaking bad reference Send a private message 130 0 Reply
Reply MrConcise | 34 #6202855 - Sunday 15 February 2015 1:50 Does Saul handle divorces? OP better call him. Send a private message 43 1 Reply
Reply ohSNAPyall | 26 #6202904 - Sunday 15 February 2015 3:27 Saul will handle anything. Send a private message 24 1 Reply
Reply tossaway2321 | 5 #6203131 - Sunday 15 February 2015 8:10 I'm not so sure that would be worse Send a private message 12 1 Reply
Reply julianbozikovic | 20 #6203175 - Sunday 15 February 2015 9:57 Better call Saul! Send a private message 13 1 Reply
Reply D3ATHCARDNO7 | 5 #6203230 - Sunday 15 February 2015 12:58 He has a point you know. Send a private message 0 3 Reply
Reply incoherentrmblr | 21 #6203556 - Sunday 15 February 2015 20:24 Better call The Wolf from Pulp Fiction... Send a private message 1 6 Reply
Reply gatorclay97 | 28 #6204971 - Tuesday 17 February 2015 15:06 The .2 makes this comment. Send a private message 1 1 Reply
By BBeffedmylife | 28 #6202753 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:30 I'm so sorry that you have an asshole for a husband. I couldn't imagine how it would feel to go through that during what's supposed to be a positive and beautiful moment. Send a private message 147 5 Reply
Reply cheeeksss | 29 #6203240 - Sunday 15 February 2015 13:15 I agree. Like his wife JUST delivered a baby. How the fuck can he go off and flirt with another woman? It's like a slap in the face to OP. Send a private message 22 2 Reply
By Haze115 | 14 #6202761 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:33 aw congrats on the baby! sorry about the flirting part though Send a private message 57 1 Reply
By WhatHappenedToIt | 22 #6202763 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:34 Wow! What a douche! Send a private message 69 0 Reply
By singafairytale | 11 #6202770 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:39 I'm pretty sure that says where your relationship stands. When you are giving him something so special, he's sure showing you his loyalty. Send a private message 71 1 Reply
By ndnpride88 | 25 #6202773 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:40 WoW that sucks. Hopefully you work things out or if he's that daring to do it while your around just imagine what he does when your not Send a private message 37 4 Reply
Reply emeraldisle | 30 #6202895 - Sunday 15 February 2015 2:55 **you're Send a private message 10 17 Reply
Reply mrmcleod | 29 #6202932 - Sunday 15 February 2015 4:15 Go away Nazi. Send a private message 4 8 Reply
By BBlah | 26 #6202777 - Saturday 14 February 2015 23:45 Your husband's got some freakin nerve! What the hell Send a private message 48 0 Reply
Reply ladyg228 | 15 #6203491 - Sunday 15 February 2015 19:21 They are both equally at fault. It takes two to tango! Shame on both of them Send a private message 0 21 Reply
Today, barely able to pay rent while working 3 jobs, I decided to give in to the idea of making online sex work photos and videos. Everyone else seems... I agree, your life sucks 768 You deserved it 261 5 Comments
Today, I started to cry while masturbating. This isn't the first time that this has happened. FML I agree, your life sucks 579 You deserved it 234 4 Comments