Today, I was kneeling down at work to do some cleaning. My co-worker said, "Oh don't your knees hurt, kneeling like that for so long?" Without thinking how it sounded, I said, "Oh no, it's not a problem. I'm on my knees all the time." He's yet to stop hitting on me. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, at work I was talking to a co-worker about what a slacker my manager was, and how all she did was stand around and talk. She was standing behind me the whole time. I now have sore nuts due to a direct hit from a broom handle. FML
Today, I was cleaning at work when an elderly gentleman walked towards me, paused, and with a wink said, "That's what I like to see: a girl on her knees." This is the same workplace where another old man informed me that my yellow uniform made me look like a "suggestive cheesecake." FML
Today, at work, the janitor would not stop telling me how good I looked. This was after he told me he was fired for sexual harassment at his last job. He clearly learned that lesson. FML
Today, I met a new guy at work who wouldn't stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six-hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me that he was her husband. FML
Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML
Today, my attractive boss sat me down in the break room to say how much she appreciated how much work I've been doing despite being a temp. She was wearing a skirt, and I couldn't take my eyes off her legs. She then patted me on the leg and said "Good Talk". It wasn't my leg. FML
Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML
Today, at a job interview, my interviewer bent forward and I admired his ass. When he turned, I couldn't tell if he caught me or not. At the end of the interview he shook my hand in congratulations of getting the job, then said, "Yes, I do work out." I have to see him every day now. FML
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Today, at work, I was talking to a colleague about what the worst pain he ever experienced was. He said his was being bitten by a dog, and I said I didn't know. Next thing, I was kicked in the balls from a behind by another work colleague. She said, "What about that?" I agreed, it was. FML
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Top comments
fretforyerlatte 0
well, you kinda asked for that one.
mcsnelly 5
Okay yeah that sounded really bad but everyone's said something without thinking about it and it sounded dirty...you DEFINITELY don't deserve to be hit on constantly just because you made a slip up like that!
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Comments (110)
rayvin10 0
u walked right into that 1
pongmaster 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAQA
Sniper3000 0
yea like 1 time on the internet i told someone who he thought was a boy is a girl. he asked me how i know and i said i checked her thing. i was talking about her profile and he thought i meant her "you know wat".
peaceSUCKAh 0
haha I made that mistake before
JmaJustyn 0
That's what she said.
ladidalisa 0
hahahahahahahahahahahah in my favourites :)
mockingjay_fml 0
.......... people and they're dirty minds ....
De_Leon3309 0
YDI for being a dumb broad and not thinking before acting; Slap on the fact that you didn't destroy him when he said that and you did not file sexual harassment the instant he flirted with you. Btw, he could've been fired for trying to fraternize with a co-worker. Shame on your ignorant mind.
xNephilim 19
A lot of places don't fire you for having a relationship with a coworker. It's supervisors you're not supposed to be getting it on with.
rajdeep 8
i feel bad for you, you said something meant to be innocent, and people with dirty minds always take it the other way
ITS_SNORLAX 4
Forever alone.........