Today, I was in the living room with my brother and his two older, hot friends when my mother walks out from the toilet and tells me, "Honey, if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie wipe the seatie." Need I say more? FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Same thing different taste
Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we were inside, my mom yelled to me, "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML
Best clapback
Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML
Today, my mom called me and said, "I made your sister laugh so hard she peed her pants." I got home and noticed she also peed on my bed. FML
Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
Shock and awe
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, hanging out with him and his mom. I had to do a number two. A while later, we hear his mom in the washroom. She had turned on the bathtub and was flushing the toilet. A lot. Later on, my boyfriend leaves the room and she says, “Did you make that mess in the toilet?” FML
Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML
Drunk mom
Today, I heard my mom sobbing in the bathroom. Concerned, I went in to see what was wrong. I found her sitting on the toilet, pants down and a cigarette between her fingers. When I asked what was going on, she looked up at me and slurred that we'd run out of "shit-wipes." FML
Not now!
Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML
Today, I came home from school and ran to the nearest bathroom to go #2. In my hurry, I forgot to shut the door so I asked my older brother who was walking by to close it for me. After a while he didn't respond, so I looked up to see not my brother, but his best friend watching me take a crap. FML
Top comments
Shlizabeth 0
Ugh, I HATE when people say that, it's so stupid, and it doesn't sound cute like they think it does.
ThatScaryKidd 0
Parent's just don't understand
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Comments (163)
athiest_pope 0
well did ya wipe the seatie?
Velorium 0
Agreed. Either way, wipe the damn seat! YDI.
JoeBlandon 0
Classic. I Love the humor your mom displays. she single?
venom11065 0
Wouldn't believe it if she wasn't.
Inoku 0
I'm male, and even I wipe the seat. YDI, my friend. (By the way, your mom has impeccable cockblocking timing.)
koda_fml 0
How does a girl "sprinkle" They sit down.
vvtumblesbee 0
i was thinking this too! maybe if it's a public toilet and you squat, but why would you be doing that in your own home?
nikki1001 0
If she didn't wipe good enough (or stands up when she wipes) it would have dripped. lol @ me talking about someone else's wiping habits, gross.
biwinning88 1
this was what I was thinking! honestly what GIRL can't pee in the toilet, she totally deserved it.
MrJentipede 2
YDI for pissing all over the seat.
papertigers_fml 0
my thoughts exactly
mmmyeahsaraa 0
thats weird how does a girl sprinkle on the seatie lol maybe she was just trying to bust your balls even though you dont have any lol
DameGreyWulf 1
LOL definitely YDI Hope this taught you a lesson; clean the damned seat, jerk. You shouldn't try to hook up with hot guys if you're not old enough to know that.
CFR 0
I laughed....I'm sorry but it's so random xD How do people miss the toilet bowl though?...I mean really... My mom never said anything embarassing like that and if she did I just laughed it off. That sort of thing is only as big a deal as you make it really...
Luckster 0
I thought the second line was "Please be neat and wipe the seat"
letitbe56 0
I've heard both...but I like the "please be neat" version better. Seatie is not a word!