Today, I was in the living room with my brother and his two older, hot friends when my mother walks out from the toilet and tells me, "Honey, if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie wipe the seatie." Need I say more? FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, my older brother and some of his cute friends came over. When we were inside, my mom yelled to me, "I got you some bigger tampons because you leaked all over your new underwear." They all started laughing. FML
Best clapback
Today, I yelled at my little brother for leaving the toilet seat up and told him he needed to go around the house and make sure they were all down. I went to the bathroom later to find that the toilet seats and covers from every toilet had all been removed and were sitting on my bed. FML
Today, my mom called me and said, "I made your sister laugh so hard she peed her pants." I got home and noticed she also peed on my bed. FML
Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML
Today, my 2-year-old sister walked in on me while I was showering. She began to splash around in the toilet, and as I hastily jumped out to stop her, my brother and his friend got a good look as they walked past the room. FML
Shock and awe
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, hanging out with him and his mom. I had to do a number two. A while later, we hear his mom in the washroom. She had turned on the bathtub and was flushing the toilet. A lot. Later on, my boyfriend leaves the room and she says, “Did you make that mess in the toilet?” FML
Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML
Drunk mom
Today, I heard my mom sobbing in the bathroom. Concerned, I went in to see what was wrong. I found her sitting on the toilet, pants down and a cigarette between her fingers. When I asked what was going on, she looked up at me and slurred that we'd run out of "shit-wipes." FML
Not now!
Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML
Today, I came home from school and ran to the nearest bathroom to go #2. In my hurry, I forgot to shut the door so I asked my older brother who was walking by to close it for me. After a while he didn't respond, so I looked up to see not my brother, but his best friend watching me take a crap. FML
Top comments
Shlizabeth 0
Ugh, I HATE when people say that, it's so stupid, and it doesn't sound cute like they think it does.
ThatScaryKidd 0
Parent's just don't understand
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Comments (163)
FlaminYawn 0
what kind of girl pees on the seat? How is that even possible?
hbgoddard 0
I call fake!! This is a total rip off of a Ron White joke! YDI for not being original!
7businessdays 0
yeah because ron white is the only person who has ever been in this situation in the history of the human race. what are you thinking? the fact that people have lost fingers before doesnt mean that if i take a clever to my hand i'll come away just fine.
master565 0
ydi for having a rhyming socialy arkwerd mom.
person1000003 0
Oow how old are u??
nikktherocker 0
YDI for not cleaning the damn shitter after you sprinkle!
ProlapseOnToast 0
Okay.. Pissing on the seat is bad enough.. But if you're a girl that's even worse.. I'm not quite sure how you even did that.. Ugh @ the images i have in my head right now.
FYOURLIFE13 0
YDI you sick freak. URINATING ON THE SEAT IS DISGUSTING UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Essentials 0
YDI for being a nasty lazy pig. clean the seat. Eww. nasty ass.
trumpnugget 0
that is such bs!!! I saw that on a sign above a toilet at a store!
biskitbukit 7
I've seen the same sign. This FML is complete BULLSHIT.
RideTheCulture 0
obviously its an expression u idiot. shes not saying her mom made that up. god damn people on this website are ******* idiots. she was just using that expression.
muffinsareyummy 1
"if it's yellow, let it mellow. if it's brown, flush it down."