Miscellaneous: Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw...

By Inconnu - 18/06/2011 05:13 - France

Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 573

You deserved it 3 857

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By drunk - 06/03/2010 07:38 - Australia

Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 277

You deserved it 40 932

With friends like these…

By marz88 - 24/10/2009 18:27 - United States

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 688

You deserved it 7 126

By justafriend - 28/05/2017 00:00

Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 244

You deserved it 365

Tasty

By Anonymous - 22/05/2020 20:00

Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 775

You deserved it 280

By Anonymous - 17/08/2009 17:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I went with my girlfriend to her ex-boyfriend's house party. She got incredibly drunk and I spent the whole night looking after her when she was throwing up. In the brief moment before she passed out she said "thanks Matt, you're a great boyfriend." Matt is her ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 460

You deserved it 6 031

Gross, dude!

By Anonymous - 27/05/2010 02:30 - United States

Today, I picked up my 3 friends from a party. One of them drank too much and claimed she needed to throw up. I pulled over multiple times so she could. It didn't happen until we were right in front of her house and still inside my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 406

You deserved it 3 178

By allennn - 14/03/2010 14:56 - France

Today, I went to a party, and the girl I really like started telling me how much she likes me and how she thought we would be good together. I was so drunk I threw up on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 923

You deserved it 38 532

Wait, what?

By Anonymous - 10/11/2022 06:00

Today, my friend got drunk with me and texted my boyfriend, saying she was in love with him and missed him. Her brother came to my house since she got caught drunk and gave a “lecture” on responsibility. I don't know what’s worse, the lecture or the fact that he’s my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 166

Party animal

By Laci - 30/04/2011 17:50 - United States

Today, I was stuck crouching over the toilet after a night of drinking. My fiancé walked in, gathered my hair, and held it out of the way. When another wave of nausea hit me and I leaned in, he shoved my face into the bowl and ran out, laughing and yelling, "That'll teach ya!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 922

You deserved it 23 214

By Med - 13/11/2012 12:02 - Netherlands - Groningen

Today, after clubbing with my girlfriend, we went to her place. She then threw up on the floor, and went to clean herself up. When she came back, she'd forgotten that she'd just thrown up. She blamed me for puking, and kicked me out. It was 4:00 am and a 3-hour walk home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 778

You deserved it 2 972

NikkiFlysKites 8

Saturday 18 June 2011 12:15

That's when you shove her head into the toilet.

YurTriniFantasy 1

Saturday 18 June 2011 12:15

haha slap her then dunk her head in the toilet... then run... an dump your boyfriend... and go find a guy in a club to sleep with... problem solved OP!

Comments

emilyissutee 0

Tuesday 21 June 2011 14:38

that when you smash her face on the toilet bowl rim and leave her unconcious ass in the toilet.

ella868 0

Tuesday 21 June 2011 15:54

1.fin the boyfriend and friend. 2.take them to a larger toilet (European toilet, whatever theyre called) 3.stick their heads in together, with more vomit, and flush,

bh173 0

Wednesday 22 June 2011 6:07

smash that ***** face into the toilet and walk away. hope that's what you did, if not you have no balls.

SouthernBell90 0

Thursday 23 June 2011 7:14

I would of drowned that bitch in the toilet

brightandbitchy 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 15:15

slap her and then shove her face in the toilet and then bang her head on the porcelain

astriofou 0

Thursday 30 June 2011 9:24

about 95% of the people on this fml says dunk her head in the bowl. i say make out with her see wut goes. 2 girls one bowl :3 lol

lunax_fml 14

Saturday 23 July 2011 1:01

I'd have to agree. Smash the b*tch into the toilet.

suxs4ulol 22

Tuesday 29 November 2011 6:06

she was drunk, she was probably just blabbing random crap. it could have been some other girls bf

cmabmb112210 0

Saturday 3 December 2011 9:53

And that's when the hair along with her face goes into the puke filled toilet

Angel1000168 16

Sunday 18 December 2011 11:16

Well your only hope is that she slept with your boyfriend BEFORE you guys went out... I wouldnt do any face-smashing-into-toiletness before I found that one out. If it was before just tie up her hair and walk away... if it was after hold her hair into the line of puke and then walk away. :)