Today, I was hanging out with the guy I like. All of a sudden, he pulls out a small vial of his blood to give to me, proving his undying love. Curious, I asked where he had gotten the blood. His answer? A razor blade. In his nose. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I was making out with this guy when my nose started bleeding, and it got on his face. FML
Today, I was fooling around with my boyfriend in his room. He grabbed me behind the head to pull me in for a hard, romantic kiss. He accidentally smashed my nose into his cheekbone, and my nose started gushing blood and continued to bleed for over 2 hours. It's broken, and he just laughed. FML
Today, while volunteering to feed the homeless, one of them asked me to follow him to his car where he had a knife and bottle so he could "bottle up my blood". FML
Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML
Today, I wound up in hospital because my boyfriend covered my face in fake gore while I was sleeping, to see if I was really as scared of blood as I claimed. Sure enough, when I saw my reflection in the bathroom mirror, I fainted, smashing my head against the counter on the way down. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate in an alley. He pushed me up against a wall and started kissing me, but he pushed me so hard I cut open my head and needed 10 stitches. FML
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Today, my boyfriend had his arm around me. He pulled me closer, so I looked up, thinking maybe he wanted a kiss. Turns out he was picking his nose over my head. FML
Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of my nose with my fingernail, drawing blood in the process. I had to quickly up an explanation for my scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting for boogers..." FML
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
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Top comments
biggary19 3
looks like u found a keeper lol
lilspike2231 5
Then give him period blood.....jk lmao
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Comments (229)
briidontgive_ 0
That's freaking disgusting. And idont understand .. was he ready to capture the blood when it happened ? Hmm.. Strange boy.
cowjudgesyou 0
and this is why you stay away from guys that watch twilight.
fthku 13
YDI for being "curious" and asking him where he got it from, instead of running away screaming. Also, is it really the FML that he got from the nose, and not that he got it, period?
radicaloser 6
It's a little bit of both.
Xxak907xX 0
Could've been creepier. He could have had a syringe and tried to inject his blood into you.
Xxak907xX 0
Oh and I kinda think it's bad that I'm imagining the guy as a midget
radicaloser 6
Haha, he's like almost 6 feet tall, definitely not a midget (: But yeah.. I'm thankful to say there were no syringes nearby.
skyeyez9 25
Reminds me of the creep who liked me when I was in high school. He would stare at me as he fastened safety pins into the flesh of his forearm. O.O
radicaloser 6
Oh jeeze. (: At least he didn't give you the blood from it, though, right?
docscientist 10
He did it because looking at you was dangerous and he believed in safety first.
KMilliron 2
Totally sounds like you've got some lyrics doc.
Iknoweverything 29
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU EVEN ASKED!!!!!!!! I don't know if you're a woman or not, but if you are, you could put a bloody tampon in a vial and give it to him... and tell him that his undying love better not cause you to have to give up your monthly ritual.
radicaloser 6
Haha, Yes I am a woman, and I'm not too sure he'd appreciate a tampon too much..
ijnek 3
All you guys noticed was the bloody blood. How about his undyibg love. give the dude a break.
blo0_starZz 0
Agreed. You shouldn't run because of that-.-
kaengelangeleyes 9
He gave her a vial of his blood. Thats terrifying.. I'd be scared. That guy needs psychiatric help, seriously. Everyone on here seems to not think that this is a big deal. But seriously, who the hell does that. Thats really, really ****** up.
MalaInsane_11 0
why does he have vials to store blood? hes probably got bodies stored in his basement. hope you're not next.
radicaloser 6
Oh goodness, I really do hope you're wrong. Aha.
titan87 0
Hello AIDS
Xxak907xX 0
Very true
gothicwriter 0
i like the idea just not from the nose