Today, I was feeling abnormally self-confident, so I decided to skip putting on any makeup. The first thing my 7-year-old cousin said when she saw me was, "You look like my pet rat!" FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my six-year-old son told me my makeup looks like his grandmother's did in the casket. FML
Today, I was feeling unusually self-confident, so I decided to skip putting on makeup for the day. On my way to class, I passed some guys selling towels. One of them jeered, "Wanna be prettier? Buy a towel, and throw it over your face!" There goes my self-confidence. FML
Today, I was taking a shower with my girlfriend when she 'complimented' me by saying, "You’re cute, like a rat." FML
Today, I told a coworker, “You look way better without makeup.” She responded, “I’m wearing makeup.” Everyone around us gasped like I had just said "fuck" in church. FML
Today, I decided not to wear any makeup. I got told 13 times at work that I looked ill. FML
Today, I went to school without makeup. No one recognized me. FML
Today, I went to school without any makeup on. The guys who usually compliment me for being pretty are now calling me "The Greatest Illusion Ever". FML
Today, I playfully drew thick eyebrows on my one-year-old son to make him look like a cartoon villain. He laughed cutely in the mirror as I took some adorable pictures. When my husband saw, he threw such a horrendous fit about boys and makeup, I was reduced to tears. FML
Today, I was taking the subway to school. I was applying some makeup when I noticed a little boy watching me. When I was finished I heard him whisper to his mom, "I thought make up was supposed to make you pretty." FML
Today, my 6 year-old daughter saw me putting on makeup and asked, “Mommy, are you trying to look less tired or more alive?” FML
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Top comments
Catkam623 27
That's when you bit her right and then went off to eat an entire wheel of cheese right?
Arthua 9
That's not the way you talk to your pets!
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Comments (101)
zuzupetalsYO 11
You let a 7 yr old smash your confidence?...hahahaha!
TXfmylifer 10
Who lets their kid have a pet rat. Hello, bubonic plague...
Grimnirwher9 21
The bubonic plage is transmitted to humans by rat fleas, not the rats themselves. Pet rats tend not to have fleas. Also, the bubonic plage is carried by the black rat only. Pet rats are always brown rats (referring to species here, not fur color). Before you start hating on other people's pet choices, get your facts straight.
TXfmylifer 10
Did you look that up on Wikipedia?
_Princess_Peach_ 9
She probably meant it as a compliment. I thought my pet gerbil was a disney princess lookalike when I was a kid, loved her!
beanthemouse 13
But rats are cute! Huge, innocent eyes, whats NOT cute about them?
gpg5 19
*picks cousin up and drop kick her* SCOOOOOOOOOORE!!!!!!!!!
ImGucci 8
Did she give you cheese
love_me_electric 20
I had the opposite problem. I normally don't wear make-up when babysitting my neighbors kids. One day I had some on when I went over there and the little girl goes "Why does your face look weird today?" Kids don't censor anything they say, don't take it too seriously.
mattuti 8
How is that a bad thing? Have you ever seen a pet rat? That shit's cute as hell. No one in their right mind would say they're ugly. Definitely not a 7-year old girl who's talking about her own pet rat.
ifavela89 13
kids can be so cruel now a days
JoseIsAdork 31
oh no they didnt! girl, hold mah Cheddar!