Today, I was eating with my boyfriend and his family at a high-end restaurant when, suddenly, I screamed, thinking a dog had just bitten my leg. I am terrified of dogs. I kicked my under-the-table assailant as hard as I could. It was my boyfriend's adorable five-year-old sister. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Same thing different taste
Today, I had dinner with my boyfriend's family. His 3-year-old nephew came running for a hug. At the last second, he darted past my arms and bit me on the ass. FML
Today, while I was cooking, my dogs were messing around behind me. I suddenly felt a painful bite on my ass cheek and instinctively kicked back. I then realized it was my 3-year-old daughter, who was laying on the floor crying with a nose bleed. FML
Will you…
Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML
Adding insult to injury
Today, my mom's super spoiled small demon dog attacked my 3 year-old daughter, mauling her leg. Out of instinct, I kicked it away, causing it to fly across the room yelping. I picked up my daughter and took her straight to the hospital, where she got stitches. Later that night, I was greeted with a vet bill. FML
Today, I got bitten by my aunt's dog. My brother was holding the leash. He said he didn't pull the dog away from me because he didn't want to rip my shirt. Meanwhile, the dog was biting a penny-sized chunk out of my hip. FML
Today, the family dog was in the garbage and wouldn't stop eating. He is a large dog, and I had to put my arms around him and pull him out of the trash can. Well, he bit me so hard I was bleeding. My whole family is siding with the dog and saying it was my fault for not letting him eat. FML
Today, a dog bit me, tearing a hole through my sweatpants, my shorts, and my underwear, all to get at the dog treat I'd hidden in my pocket. FML
Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML
Today, my sister asked me to let her dog out of the kennel when I got home. I did only to have the little beast bite me. She then ate the entire content of the cat's litter box, which she couldn't keep down. FML
Today, I was on the couch, about to make out with the guy I've been dating. As soon as our lips touched, my overprotective dog ran up and bit him. He bled. FML
Top comments
Tehalon 0
You did a good job, kids should know its not polite to play under the table in a high-end restaurant. Do wonder why you would think a dog is walking around in a high-end restaurant...
CrimsonKnight 0
It'll teach her not to bite peoples legs or to crawl under tables when your out eating. It'll save her parents trying to teach her.
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Comments (284)
Radiation_fml 0
Why would there be a dog in a "high end" restaurant?
CheeseGirl 0
Dogs that bite and children that bite are both bad things that should NOT be under the table at a high-end restaurant when people are eating. I would have done the same thing out of reflex, honestly.
latuka 0
and 44 plenty of people are scared of dogs, not only mexicans... and did the kid actually BITE her? as 35 said, it could have been many more things than a girl actually biting her. nowhere did the OP say the girl bit her. so quit assuming things guys.
dreams_infinity_fml 0
lol its terrible that it was a kid but I would do the same since I have a phobia of dogs
Bunbu 8
Why would there be a dog in a restaurant? Did you not notice the child was gone from the table? Either way, you're a moron. Enjoy knowing you kicked an innocent little girl in the face.
tabyyy 0
just pointing out that the OP *thought* something bit her leg. she never said whether or not the kid actually did it. and as 29379128 people said before... why would there be a dog running around a high-end restaurant? next time think before you react.
afj67 0
if it was a high-end restaurant, the parents should not let their daughter under the table. i totally don't blame you because i would have freaked out too. you do, however, owe this girl and her family an apology and have some serious making up to do. your life is pretty ****** right now :-( also, plenty of people bring their handbag sized dogs into restaurants. again, totally don't blame you for your reaction.
clampy4x4 0
Why the hell would there be a dog in a high end restaurant? Think before you kick.
babyqueball718 0
I like how people say "think before you react." It wouldn't be a reaction if you thought about it first. They just happen. If something scares you under the table, chances are you are going to make sudden movements. It's not her fault there was a child under the table where she clearly did not belong. And it was not her responsibility to keep an eye on a kid that wasn't hers. She was at dinner...not babysitting. I place no blame but on lack of supervision... oh and i'm terrified of dogs also.
lost_in_lalaland 0
I cannot BELIEVE the amount of comments arguing each other on this thread. XD fail.