Today, I was doing the reverse cowgirl with my boyfriend. I was on the way to a glorious finish when he pointed out that I had a pimple on my butt. He began to laugh so hard that he went soft. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, right before my boyfriend and I were about to have sex, he touched his butt and says, "Oh I have a butt pimple." He then went and popped it. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom after he had been in there a while. I found him with his pants down, looking at a pimple on his butt in the mirror. He asked me for, "Help." FML
Today, while getting intimate with my boyfriend, he started sucking on my breast. He ended up popping a pimple on it into his mouth. He threw up and that, as they say, was the end of that. FML
Today, after making love to my boyfriend, I went upstairs to shower. After turning it on, I found a huge pimple on my leg and the prospect of popping it excited me more than my boyfriend ever had in bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend was giving me a back massage while I was laying on my stomach. A few minutes into it, he stopped. I turned around to see why; he was taking a picture of my butt. FML
Today, I was feeling up my girlfriend's chest. I was getting into it until she said, "What are you doing?" I said I was rubbing her nipple. She replies, "That's not my nipple, its a pimple." FML
Today, I couldn’t wait to get home and get my boyfriend naked, which I did. Although, to be honest, popping every single pimple in the rash on his back was not the kind of foreplay I had had in mind. FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me and decided it'd be funny to blow raspberries in my crotch. He literally thought it was the funniest thing ever. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML
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Top comments
every1luvsboners 11
Shut-up, idiot. Your girlfriend thought you had a pimple until you pissed out of it.
heathz 9
geez time to get off that horse.
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Comments (197)
miZscrZee 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
that's DISGUSTING. maybe u should wash URSELF better??
Eenonymous 1
Don't lie and pretend like you've never had one. You could get them from eating weird food too
Freeze_fml 17
I've never discovered one in that region.
AMB3AST 7
The world is full of those who think they're perfect.
AMB3AST 7
...Get over yourself.
ejjamael 5
I think I see a pimple on your face...
ambamm135 7
Yes because pimples don't come out of raging hormones it's purely hygiene -_-
ProhibitionRose 14
It has little to do with how well you was yourself. Maybe I'm crazy but I never thought if using acne face wash on my ass, but I guarantee almost everyone has had a pimple on their ass at one point, even if they refuse to admit to it, or just didn't notice.
MeganCello 8
Your spelling is disgusting. -.-
Freeze_fml 17
I'm guessing the butt pimple is more common than I thought. Thumbs here are amusing though, I apologize for my offensive anti-butt pimple comment. Generalizing statements be damned.
McAninch35 9
As someone who popped a butt pimple today, I take offense to that comment.
stacianichole 2
Acne is almost 100% hormonal, related to over-production of sebum. Had this debate with the BF not too long ago. Pretty unrelated to hygiene though if you shower once a week, that doesn't help.
stacianichole 2
P.S. mZcRzwhatever, you are a bitch.
dillies 3
Excuse me miss but you have a big ass whitehead on your nose so u shouldn't be talking.
Zoranius 6
****, i almost puked..
thewifey310 7
I really dnt thnk u shuld b talkin lady, ur teeth look all jacked up and ur over here talkin abt a pimple!!! Wtf seriously, looks arnt evrythng and no one is perfect!! Im sure u have flaws regardless of ur pretty face( not so much tha teeth)!!!
thewifey310 7
#13.mzscrazzie!!! Ur a shallow grl who thnks her sht dnt stink for ur "DISGUSTING" ass comment, get a new attitude and outlook on life n stop bein so shallow like ur 100% perfect!! News flash,!!!no one is!!!
stacianichole 2
146 - don't be just as bad as she is by criticizing her appearance. Looks aren't everything, this chick's attitude is what's ****** up - not her teeth. Though that's one fake as hell expression in her face, isn't it? And I think that's a piercing on her nose, the placement is just awkward.
glittercookies 12
Every time you post, it annoys me.
asia3pea90 13
....you sound soo stupid. I want you to shut the **** up right now. Your making yourself seem like a complete idiot it's not even funny.
kalbrek009 20
That's when you dismount, turn around and laugh @ his "smallness" of being soft. Bet he won't laugh @ you again. :)
toelie 26
Yes, that will make your relationship better. Honestly, the occasional fit of laughter is inevitable when it comes to sex, and he can't really help going soft because of it. Have a laugh with him, then help him get ready again.
mdtdnb 7
I bet he would...a guy doesn't take that shit personally knowing the girl is just trying to make him mad.
RedPillSucks 33
Laughter is inevitable during sex?
Hadewych 4
I'm sorry for you. And I've just spilled the beans.
sailoroftheseas 7
cockblock!
irishman1989 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You totally deserve it. If you weren't dirty and took control of proper hygiene you wouldn't have had that problem.
every1luvsboners 11
Shut-up, idiot. Your girlfriend thought you had a pimple until you pissed out of it.
My_Nightmare 19
Boners, I love you
THE_A_TEEN 28
You can get pimples from eating wierd food's too. Not everything involves hygiene. Don't be brain-washed by those proactive ads.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
Exactly 42. Although I wouldn't say weird food, just improper for your body. People's tolerance of different foods varies. Also, a friend of mine gets them from riding a bike for longer periods of time, and I've heard a lot of other bike riders have that problem. Of course they have no hygiene problems.
NullPointer 20
I wouldn't even say improper food. Some people are just prone to getting acne, no matter what they do or what they eat. It's like being tall, or having green eyes. Some people are just that way. Stupid to blame it on bad hygiene, or even food.
daftPunKt 4
Haha that was amazing
Torva_fml 16
Boners, I read your comment and burst out laughing in the doctors office.... Everyone was staring at me..... Look what you did!! o.o
Nacole31 0
yeah like I'm gonna take some face wash and fricken massage my ass with it!!!
MisterEx 28
Perfect reply, 22. Except you misspelled boyfriend.
cmtexx03 0
Phahahhahahah omg.
SummerFever 8
Here's an idea 17, how about we strap you down and have Boners look for pimples on you?
Yetifoot 0
If you're dirty you font get pimples you get krabs and herpes.
kimono_fml 17
actually, dairy does cause acne. it's both food and hormones
glittercookies 12
I've been battling acne since 6th grade. I can tell you right now, it has everything to do with hormones and stress. And sometimes diet. And sometimes sweat/tight clothes. Everyone gets small outbreaks sometimes. No one is perfect. Even people with "perfect skin." Stop being insensitive.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
52, In my opinion, it's more stupid to just shrug and say some people are "just that way". There is a cause for everything. Just because some people might not have been able to pinpoint the cause of whatever ailment they have, does not mean there isn't one. Even normal physical characteristics, such as eyecolor, have a cause. That cause, however is not the same as the cause for impermanent conditions. Genetics might play a role in them, but for something like acne, all they can do is predispose you to having acne, but it can be prevented in one way or another. There's no one cure for all, unlike what the beauty industry would have you believe. It's different for EVERYONE.
katheriine_fml 0
Because puberty can be avoided?
dompa2011 0
Dude you are still pissing in your balls.
dhardesty23 8
hahahahaha oh my god hahaha
heartlessj 8
Why?
mk58 31
How immature. Everyone will have one at least once in their life. If not, they either haven't lived long enough, or they're an alien.
My_Nightmare 19
How old is he, 15?!
somerandomdude19 2
Hahahaha 15 thumbs up!! x) ohh the irony
McAninch35 9
Next person to thumb it up better sleep with one eye open
zebramedic 10
Hehe it has more than 15 now.... Lol
smoke_eater05 0
You should find yourself a man that knows how to finish what he starts...
malignantmegan 3
Agreed
HomeAl0ne 20
Preferably one who is long sighted and won't notice the pimples.
starsfan_9 7
At least he gave you an opportunity to go the full 8 seconds before failing to satisfy you