Today, I was at the lake with my family. I was drinking from a can of soda but didn't realize a bee flew into the can. I didn't swallow it, but I now have Kylie Jenner's lips. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right inside my mouth. My tongue got stung. FML
Tasty
Today, at a party, a fly flew into my mouth. I spat it out, and in an effort to wash my mouth out, I grabbed the can of coke that was on the table next to me. Apparently people had been spitting in there and using it as an ashtray. FML
Big tasty
Today, I was at a barbecue and, unbeknownst to me, took a bite of really hot bacon. In my ensuing panic, I grabbed and took a swig of my friend's beer. It wasn't beer, at least not any more. She was using it as an ashtray, and I got a mouthful of cigarette butts. FML
RIP
Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked, I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML
Ewwwwww
Today, my sister took me out shopping for my birthday and had been drinking a Monster the whole day. Halfway back home, I took a sip of it and she screamed, but it was too late. I had drunk the phlegm that she spat into the can earlier. FML
Today, I had a sip of my coffee and felt a lump of some kind enter my mouth. I thought it was a bit of biscuit, and then remembered I didn't have biscuits this morning with my coffee. I took it out of my mouth and it was a huge black fly. I then spat the rest of my coffee all over my laptop. FML
Added protein
Today, I was drinking lemon juice through a straw. After finishing half of the drink, I noticed there was a cockroach in my straw. FML
Today, I went to my favorite drive-in burger joint for dinner. As I was nearing the end of my burger, I grabbed a cup from the cup holder that I thought was filled with soda. Instead, I got a mouthful of dip spit that a friend left in my car. FML
Numb
Today, I had a dentist appointment in which a nurse numbed my mouth. After coming home, I took a nap in which I unknowing bit through my top lip. I physically can't speak. FML
Today, I accidentally took my mouthwash like a shot. I don't know what burned more, when it went down or when it came back up. FML
Top comments
Welshite 39
Cheaper than Botox. It'll be the newest "natural environmentally friendly" fad. The tag line should read: "Bee One with Nature".
samsterling 19
I could just see that in a magazine ad... "WANT TO SPRUCE UP YOUR LIPS? COME IN TODAY WITH 'DR.' JENNER'S ALL NATURAL 100% BEE LIP ENHANCMENTS, FOR ONLY $899.99 + $299.99 CO-PAY EACH!"
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Comments (29)
deltax 8
Plastic surgeons hate her... get bigger lips with this one weird trick!
ThymastarGT 11
Same thing happened to me in 6th grade! I feel your pain OP!
BlackHawkSavior 28
Oh look it's my worst fear
ezrajab 22
Ouch!
TheAspieDork 27
Damn, Burt's Bees have gone rogue!
heheitscece 16
Kylie Jenner Lip Challenge pt. 2?
saffy66 34
I voted YDI for mentioning Kylie Jenner. But other than that I really feel for you, glad you didn't swallow the bee. That could have been fatal if it stung your throat. Wasps are a bigger problem here and those things can sting you over and over.
emilieanya 2
Sane thing happened to me last year. But you can be a little thankful, lip injections can be expensive and you got yours for free!
KMN_343 3
Sadly I did the same thing when I was about 10.
Akasha_69 3
I did that when I was 3, could not talk properly for 3 days. I got so frustrated right after it happened that no one understood me I was silent for most of this 3 days