Health: Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me,...

By Anonymous - 31/03/2009 14:46 - United States

Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me, "Have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "You mean with other people?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 366

You deserved it 71 744

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Same thing different taste

By cocacola999 - 03/05/2014 10:38 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a party. Trying to overcome my social anxiety, I was trying to take part in conversations. So, when a girl mentioned she had a doctor's appointment next morning, I blurted out: "What kind of a doctor?" Everyone stared as she responded: "A gynaecologist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 770

You deserved it 7 813

By N/A - 25/09/2012 04:13 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 503

You deserved it 2 844

By Anonymous - 29/04/2013 16:51 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 798

You deserved it 13 343

By Anonymous - 20/07/2016 22:28 - United States - Columbus

Today, I went to a new doctor. While filling out charts she looked up and said, "I'm assuming you are single." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 784

You deserved it 934

By whitecollar - 05/12/2012 02:43 - United Kingdom - Scarborough

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 045

You deserved it 33 446

Mumble mumble

By Jess - 27/10/2015 20:16

Today, I called a doctor's office for a referral. I was in public, so when she asked me what type of issue I had, I mumbled that I had a vaginal issue. After painstakingly having to repeat this several times, she said she was asking what kind of insurance I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 855

You deserved it 4 498

Gushing

By NotCream - 04/10/2025 15:00

Today, I've been having persistent fungal infections and was getting treated by a male gynecologist. I had to go in to give vaginal swab tests. I washed and cleaned before I left, but when I got on the doctor's table I already had so much discharge. The doctor asked, "Is it the medicine?" I had to say no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 94

By loveless - 18/10/2009 10:30 - Australia

Today, I realised that the last three people to see my intimate parts these last weeks were my beautician, my doctor and the lady who did my check up ultra sound. Oh, and I'm married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 606

You deserved it 5 718

By WTFFAIL - 03/12/2012 05:06 - Canada - Montreal

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 583

You deserved it 9 012

Small talk fail

By notapervert - 28/02/2013 07:57 - United States - Santa Rosa

Today, I managed to score a date for the first time in over a year, and was very nervous. When I was asked what I do for a living, I laughed nervously, and then blurted out, "Finger women." What I was trying to jokingly say was that I'm a gynecologist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 978

You deserved it 39 701

UrLifeDoesntSuck 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 21:28

"No, 'lefty' doesn't count. If you ever do, use a condom."

Zynris 10

Saturday 24 August 2013 6:32

Judging by your comment and profile picture, I am just going to assume you are white trash.

Comments

Nandian90 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 6:40

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

booklover78108 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 8:13

wow... i agree on the grammer and puncuation.... now my head will be chewed out... YEA ME!!(not) but wow... wow... ummm have you not gone to the doctor in the last.... idk few yrs.... they start asking when you're like 12... and it's with ppl... and i read that fml about the bf and the goat...

PTERONOPHOBIA 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 15:07

Yo #74, now I know there's a proper phrase for my sometimes-broken English. Saaaweeeet.

hahah808 0

Thursday 2 April 2009 20:04

...and the look on the doctor's face was what they call "epic win"

revieced 13

Friday 3 April 2009 15:28

haahhahahahahahahahahaahhhhhhhhahhhahahhahaaaa!!!! AMAZING! what a line!!

Truce25 0

Friday 3 April 2009 22:24

LOL HAHAHAHAHA

nikkireese 0

Saturday 4 April 2009 0:41

for all the ppl telling me that idk wat im talking abt when i say code-switching: code=variety of language (written and/or spoken/signed), as in: dialect, entirely separate language, accent, informal vs. formal speech, etc. txting/typing on the internet for a lot of ppl usually means using different spelling and/or grammar than they would otherwise, therefore making it a different code, and therefore the code-switching label is applicable.