Today, I was at McDonald's and I was going through the drive-thru. As I was driving away, I checked my food and the lady had given me a Night at the Museum Happy Meal toy by mistake. I got so excited that I crashed the car into a pole. I'm 36. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to McDonald's and ordered a Happy Meal with a girl's toy. The high school girls behind the counter said I was too old to be served one, and I had to go home and explain to my sick daughter why she didn't get her toy. FML
Today, I went to a McDonald's drive-thru in just a shirt and underwear, thinking I wouldn't be seeing anyone. I got into a car crash. FML
Today, I was waiting in the McDonald's drive-thru and listening to some music. I was tapping my non-driving foot to the song when I accidentally tapped the wrong foot and rear ended the cop car in front of me. Whoops. FML
Today, when I was finished eating at McDonald's, I went to Shoppers to pick up a new toothbrush. I got back to my car only to find the windows smashed in. The only thing that was missing from my car was the Hello Kitty toy I got from McDonald's. Someone broke into my car for a 10 cent toy. FML
Today, I passed out in my car in a McDonald's parking lot. I got woken up by a cop. FML
Today, I felt really depressed so I decided to go to McDonald's, get a sundae and cheer myself up. I got pulled over by the cops on the way, and was given a ticket for an expired registration. McDonald's was closed. FML
Today, after a horrible day at school, I went through the McDonald's drive thru for an ice cream cone. Everything went well until I had to pull a sharp turn. The ice cream is now no longer on the cone, but instead all over my hands, face, steering wheel, and the carpet. FML
Today, I broke my mirror off going to the drive-through at McDonald's. Even the cashier watching was like, "Fuck, dude." FML
Today, my friend and I were eating in my car in a McDonald's parking lot, when an angry, drunk man stumbled out of the restaurant and into his car. He then hit the McDonald's wall, turned around and sped straight into my car. I only bought it a week ago. FML
Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML
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Top comments
dracer 0
The little joys are the best?
kmander93 0
you're ridiculous, though I would do the same
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Comments (159)
AmethystxRose 0
I'm so sorry about your car... but I have to admit, I couldn't stop laughing for 10 minutes after I read it. I was crying and laughing to the point of not being able to sit straight or breathe, and my fiance probably thinks I just went insane.
itsokay_fml 0
#126, you put a accent over the u in stupidity and your calling this guy stupid. how out you get a sense of humor that's funny!
cr1sis 0
thats why you pay attention to the road.......
Davstar 0
LMAO
rawrchimichangas 0
LAWL. dude, you're so cool. ;D
H0LLYW00D_UND3AD 0
LOLOLOL That's genius! Unlucky.
xbox_playa 0
wow. im 13 and i still think your immature. FML
_20jre 0
at least he is admitting it
MangoTango333 0
YDI for going to McDonald's. that place is awful and you will get super super super fat if you eat it often enough. it's one of the main roots of america's growing obesity problems.
xoxcinderellaxox 0
ydi for eating at mcdonalds.
pussyeater76 0
fatass you remind me of Kelsey Simpson add her on facebook!!