Miscellaneous: Today, I was at a get-together at a friend's house. Half an hour...

By Anonymous - 28/09/2015 09:01 - United Kingdom - Southam

Today, I was at a get-together at a friend's house. Half an hour in, it became clear that someone had farted, and we all took turns asking who it was. When someone asked me, my girlfriend chimed in with, "Oh please, if it was him, you'd all be dead". FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 908

You deserved it 4 682

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 05/05/2015 05:41 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was talking to a cute guy at my house party and had to fart. Luckily, it was silent. Unluckily, he smelled it, thought my house had a gas leak, and ran to the basement to check the pipes and ensure our safety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 565

You deserved it 6 314

By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 046

You deserved it 3 547

It's a gas gas gas

By Dani - 28/11/2011 12:34 - Reserved

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 370

You deserved it 9 464

Denial

By Loud - 08/09/2016 06:07 - Australia

Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 595

You deserved it 8 487

By mandygeegoesnom - 29/02/2012 05:30 - United States

Today, while waiting for my boyfriend to get out of the shower, I chatted with his grandma. As soon as we hear him exit the restroom, she smirks at me and lets a huge, smelly fart out. She blamed it on me. My boyfriend believed her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 131

You deserved it 2 530

By Kat - 08/11/2008 07:51 - France

Today, everyone thought that I was the one who farted in the lift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 414

You deserved it 5 226

Gassed

By Anonymous - 20/07/2023 03:00 - United States

Today, I went clubbing. A girl I was dancing with leaned in with a disgusted expression and said, "God, it stinks! Someone keeps farting… I swear they've got IBS." It was me. I have IBS. I was farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 459

By Fartfail - 18/04/2012 13:43 - Hong Kong - Corozal

Today, while vacuuming my new apartment, I farted a few times. After my last fart, I turned to find my super-hot neighbor standing at the door. Panicking, I asked in a "I-didn't-just-fart-my-ass" tone, "Oh hi! Been standing there for long?" She replied, "Since your initial rip." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 793

You deserved it 6 770

Blame the pooch

By anamota89 - 11/05/2012 09:33 - United States

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. I had to fart really badly, so thinking that he wouldn't hear me, I did so. He heard me and asked, "Did you fart?" I said "No, it was my dog." I don't have a dog, and he knows this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 336

You deserved it 32 285

Check her out

By minnie - 28/08/2009 18:30 - United States

Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 793

You deserved it 6 899

jqmalang 17

Monday 28 September 2015 17:50

HAHAHAHA that was actually a great one from her! She saved you (:

curlytop101 23

Monday 28 September 2015 17:54

On the bright side, at least they know it wasn't actually you who did it

Comments

TheDraconis 8

Monday 28 September 2015 18:10

that's awesome

TroubleWithStich 11

Monday 28 September 2015 18:54

Well although that was embarrassing for you I admire her sense of humour. Lighten up, sometimes you need to laugh at yourself!

xx000o 27

Monday 28 September 2015 19:01

Sounds like she takes pride in your gas.

sunny354wi 8

Monday 28 September 2015 19:01

She's kidding...if it was you and you ever farted before, she'd have been dead!! :)

GrumpyGrinch 23

Monday 28 September 2015 19:19

She saved you. For a price.

Ayeeenoosh 7

Monday 28 September 2015 19:25

Well, maybe it was her.

Le_ponderer 14

Monday 28 September 2015 19:27

That's hilarious! That lady is a keeper buddy. What a witty response.

Badkarma4u 17

Monday 28 September 2015 19:32

Aww thats so sweet. Definately a keeper.

I_Like_Dogs 28

Monday 28 September 2015 19:39

Why don't you just let it go? Asking who did it is immature and makes people uncomfortable.

TheGatekeeper43 8

Monday 28 September 2015 19:55

You're overreacting man. It could've been a lot worse

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 92 783

You deserved it 16 305

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I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 86

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 37 685

You deserved it 4 194

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I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 113

Today, I saw a girl texting at school. I told her she might want to put her phone away before she got a detention. She turned around and I saw she was changing her insulin level on her pump. She has diabetes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 868

You deserved it 57 259

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I agree, your life sucks 32 643

You deserved it 6 153

Today, I woke up with a horrible UTI after having sex with my fiance the night before. I went to an urgent care to get antibiotics as my primary is closed. Turns out, I'm allergic to condom lubricant. Now everytime I pee, It not only burns, but smells like a nasty condom... FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 487

You deserved it 213

Today, at work, we finally got a digital projector so our theater can show 3D movies. Our first movie is The Jonas Brothers Concert. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 035

You deserved it 9 143