Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I heard a gunshot not too far from the house. This is not unusual, as I live way out in the boonies and hunters tend to roam the woods. What isn't normal is a stray bullet hitting my above-ground pool, which promptly split open and released a torrent of water that flooded my basement. FML
Today, while mowing my backyard, I messily discovered that a family of rabbits has been living out there in the tall grass. FML
Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML
Today, I wanted revenge on my neighbor, whose dog craps in my yard, so I spent a day at the dog park gathering up dog shit. I piled it up by the property line and ran over it with the mower, intending to spray his driveway and car with turds. Instead, it gummed up the mower. Now it stinks too bad to fix. FML
Today, my dog proudly brought home a rabbit he'd killed. The same rabbit that belongs to my neighbor's daughter. FML
Today, I was on my back patio talking with my husband. It got dark outside, and I saw something shuffling in the back yard. I freaked out so bad that I went to run inside, only to fly face-first into the screen door. Turns out the shuffling was a baby rabbit. FML
Today, my 6 ft snake got loose. I found it. It was in my neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit. FML
Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML
Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML
Today, after I warned my son repeatedly that if he wanted a rabbit he had to clean and feed it, I checked on it. It wasn’t just dead, it was dead and rotting in a pool of its own pee and faeces. I yelled at him, but he just shrugged and told me rabbits are boring and he forgot it was even there. FML
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Top comments
narks 0
Not only did you try to kill it instead of just relocating it, but you tried to justify your shit aim with 'the bullet missed' instead of 'I missed'. This one calls for a YDI unfortunately.
tkmac 0
Sounds like a Tom & Jerry episode.
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Comments (868)
sarahdg 0
you're right, you should have shot that defenseless hungry bunny for munching on your garden. it doesn't ******* know any better! if you were a hungry animal you would eat what you could find! YOU DESERVED IT. heartless bastard.
EmbryH 0
HA! You got what you deserved, man. 100% what you deserve. They're just plants, and it's just an innocent animal trying to get by. Geez. I'm glad your pool got shot up.
that_guy01 0
First off **** all the queers who are complaining about shooting at a poor innocent bunny blah blah blah. Fags. Second, Its like the first rule of shooting, always know you're target AND what's BEHIND it. You, my friend deserved it, but not for shooting at a rabbit, i would have done the same. And then stewed him up to replace my lost plants. No, YDI for being an idiot. Oh yea and once again the people complaining about shooting animals are *******. That is all.
that_guy01 0
city slickers are *******
sarahdg 0
ahahahaha, KARMA FTW
kbd77 0
@ #478: So, you are homophobic and a douchebag? We need gun control for idiots like the original poster and Mr. "Anyone who doesn't like to kill stuff for fun is gay and gay is bad because it makes you a fairy and being a fairy means you're not tough which means you're not a man." **** off asshole. Go take your gun and shoot your balls off. YDI.
ilse1989 0
You sooo deserved that one. You're mean.
kbd77 0
@472: Look, I think it's great that you and others are vegetarians. I completely support your ideas and message. But please do not try to force your views on others. We choose to eat meat just as you choose not to; it is our choice, and we do not deserve to be criticized for it. In an ideal world, I would love to be a vegetarian. But I don't have the willpower. I'm sure many feel the same.
RobotStrut 7
I'll get you fo' dis, wabbit! Good job, ya tool bag.
_mcs_ 0
That's terrible. The poor rabbit was hungry. YDI