By pool party - 29/05/2013 00:48 - United States - Rockford

Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 302
You deserved it 59 061

Same thing different taste

Top comments

WonkeyDonkey 10

Good job! I think they deserved it and the $500 you have to pay was worth every cent ;)

They'll never mess with you again, that's worth more I reckon.


StitchnLilo 24
3rdbass 9

Prepare for a torrential downpour of negs.

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then000bster 16

Them* it was more than one guy. Would have been better to call the cops tbh.

How did I overlook that? Thank you so much. Now it's a bit more understandable.

Yeah, because you don't want to deal with that shit, I don't want to wake up to a bunch of pathetic teens jerking about in my pool, and I sure as hell don't want to get into a conversation with them.

OP should have used frozen paintballs. they hurt a lot more and leave less evidence.

Paintballs don't freeze. they're oil with gelatin shells. as soon as you take them out of the freezer they just become brittle and break.

as a pool owner, yes... it is necessary. Police often will not show up in time to catch the morons... And just in case you are unaware: pool repairs are ******* expensive. if those morons rip up your liner its expensive and your pool is down for *at least* 3 weeks (or about 1/4 of the summer in IL) Nevermind the fact that even if your gate was locked and they jumped the fence: its America. Any accidental injury or death would be blamed on the homeowner and the families would probably sue.

All in all, those ******* deserved it!

Actually, if the gate is locked, the law is on your side. If they jump over the fence, that's trespassing. Doesn't really give you the right to shoot them with a paintball gun, but at least you would win a lawsuit.

open, locked or upside down, private property is private property. It's marked by the square footage not the fence. Unless pool covers are required by the law, no self respecting judge would ever entertain a lawsuit against the owner because the first and only offense is trespassing.

imagineapc 11

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chell1894 13

I guess you've never heard of the robberies where the robber gets hurt from jumping through a window or something and then sues for millions.... It's America. The law is rarely on your side

The way I see it 49, is they'd be lucky I don't use a real gun. They tresspassed, and being a group how do I know they won't try some other stupid shit?

tjv3 10

They were lucky it was only paintballs

No... I got jumped once and I've had other stuff happen to me for which I have called the police. They're so scared of getting sued that they don't do anything at all unless they have 999% assurance that the suspect will be charged guilty. They exploit technicalities and refuse to do anything if any can be used by the defense lawyer even though they personally told me they knew that these were probably the right guys

IT_Nird95 9

Really!? Hell, in certain parts of America pulling a stunt like that will catch you some real lead, not just paintballs.

audreyfml1994 15

Actually, 49, that is not how the law works in the US. As idiotic as it sounds, if an intruder injures them self breaking into your home, they have the right to sue you, and there's nothing you can do about it.

phantumgrey 6

#2 are you retarded? Someone trespasses you light them up like a god damn Christmas tree of you can!!!

whomshallIfear 4

Nope # 49, you could still lose under the tort of negligence because a pool is a place that can, and will, forseeably attract children, therefore, as a matter of law you could be found liable. It all depends on what type of jury is selected: plaintiffs will want sympathetic parents, especially mothers, defendant will want young fresh out of college kids and old people. By the way OP, you kind of just confessed to a crime... and you can also be found civilly liable to each of the kids for Assault and Battery.

whomshallIfear 4

And 53, the tort of trespassing is not a bar from being held liable for other torts. It helps because you have less of a duty to protect trespassers from foreseeable risks of harms than those you invite, however, a duty still exists which means a judge would be forced to hear it; applying the facts is left up to the jury.

Nope, a locked fence will still prevent you from being held liable- because you did your duty in fencing it in, and then they trespassed. Your responsibility to prevent others from harm ends with building the fence. The only other thing you should do would be to put up a sign warning against trespassers. If they had to jump the fence, they clearly were trespassing, so you will not be found liable.

v1kt4r 13

Actually that's not guaranteed, I remember reading a story about a burglar who broke into this guys house, the owners came home while he was still there. He got injured trying to get away, sued and won

MikeonFML 17

You WILL lose if you don't have a no trespassing sign visibly hanging and they injury themselves on your property

sonasonic 34

worth it. trust me, if that happens to me, it'll be 200 rounds and a yellow fence.

WonkeyDonkey 10

Good job! I think they deserved it and the $500 you have to pay was worth every cent ;)

Yes, most definitely worth it! Invite them back next month.

Well... Yellow is a nice colour. You should keep it.

think about this; if he had a speedball gun, they shoot 12.5 to 15 balls per second. if you have no gear, and in theory turned up the fps (feet per second) that's really going to hurt..

Agreed, better to pay a little extra now and keep them away all summer than have them come back because you just yelled at them and have them really **** up your pool long term!

You got issues. Your mom was probably ugly or fat. You probably aint rich cause $500 its soo much to you.

#105 um who cares if his mom is fat or if he has an extra 500$ laying around? you trying to degrade him just made you look like scrum. btw 500$ is a good weeks pay rich or not it sucks to have to give up an entire week.

bombroot 9

You always write mean things! So just shut it

MzZombicidal 36

Really? How does OP's mother's appearance have anything to do with their actions? Also, how do they have issues for warding off trespasses? Too bad we can't paint you yellow.

They'll never mess with you again, that's worth more I reckon.

wlddog 14

Fun fact, oil and oil based liquids float on top of water. They make oil soap pads and matts, that float on top of the water and suck up oil like a sponge. They dont cost $500. And instead of a paintball gun, how about shooting a round or two into the air with a shotgun. That way they get the point and quickly disperse, and you no longer have to remove paintballs from the pool.

Shooting a gun in the air is dangerous. What goes up must come down. In this case it would be safe to carry some blanks.

twinkie193 6

Thats joe Biden approved so the government will side with you

#84 Only problem is that a firearm has to be specially modified to fire a blank. And not only is that frickin' expensive, it also leaves you with a useless firearm. And in most states firing a firearm within city limits is illegal even if they are trespassing, unless they are an instant threat to your life. In Kentucky ( and I don't know about other states) you are only allowed to shoot a person(s) if they have invaded your home or are an instant threat to your life.

"Negligent discharge of a firearm..." I can see the ruling now.

wlddog 14

Firing a shotgun up into the air does nothing. It is a fist full of tiny BB's that hurt nothing when they fall. Apparently no one knows anything about terminal velocity and grape shot. So let the lesson begin. Firing a bullet in a random direction is bad. It can hit someone. Firing a shotgun with bird shot straight up in the air hurts nothing, except maybe a bird. And since wild birds are cheaper to replace than $500, i think it is still a cheaper solution than a paintball gun.

131 And apparently you know nothing about energy conservation or projectile motion. Since we're talking about a shotgun shooting pellets into the air, we can look at it as though it is simple harmonic motion in an isolated system (meaning that it's frictionless, which it is since air has practically no resistance when it comes to slowing down a bullet or in this case, pellets fired from a shotgun. We'll call the barrel the Equilibrium position and gravity (9.81 m/s^2) the restoring force. In an isolated system, mechanical energy is 100% conserved. So when the gun first shoots, it has maximum kinetic energy. Once it reaches the maximum displacement, or amplitude, from the equilibrium position, the energy has been fully converted to potential energy, while maintaining the same mechanical energy. Now that the pellets have momentarily been halted by gravity, the restoring force can do it's job in pulling the pellets back to the equilibrium point where they will once again reach maximum velocity. So what did I teach you here? That those "handfuls of BBs" have the same god damned velocity when they come back down as when they do when they leave the barrel!! -_-

How did you not see that putting paint in your pool might be an issue..? YDI

narkill 13

You're an idiot. All there is to it.

'Paint' in a paintball isn't exactly what you might think. It is more closely related to colored vegetable oil than the stuff that is in a can of spray-paint. While some brands do have a nasty 'bad' oil based fill similar to 'real' paint, most have environment friendly biodegradeable gelatin shells and fills that don't stain very much, if at all.

3rdbass 9

Only Rambo can be Rambo and get away with it.

narkill 13

People like #2 make me question If people even actually read these fmls. Like

ryanmanning 3

And people like you make me question why your parents didn't use birth control

Did anyone notice #7's profile says he's from YOLO? Clearly he's in a position to insult others seeing as how he's so well-educated.

narkill 13

And obviously you don't know what the **** sarcasm is. Retard.

MrClean17 15

Did that really seem like the best course of action? I wouldn't shoot a paintball gun anywhere near my house

You're right. If they wouldve come to my house they wouldve been met with a real gun. So a paintball gun is sooooooo unnecessary...

Lighten up. I'd love to have trespassers that I could justify shooting safe/toy weapons at. It'd be a memorable experience and break up the monotony of the daily grind. Water repair wouldn't be the most ridiculous bill I've had.

Well you kinda deserve it, what type of redneck reaction is that? You should have told them off your property and eventually threaten them with your paintball gun, not use it.

WonkeyDonkey 10

If one or all of them injured themselves or drowned in the pool, who's responsible? (The property/pool owner) Which then means they can sue them. If they are cheeky enough to climb into someone else's yard and pool without permission, I reckon they would of pissed in there too. They clearly deserved each and every paintball! I know if someone shot my ass with a paintball gun, I wouldn't come back!

exactly. homeowners are stuck dealing with that stupid crap. since its on YOUR property, somehow, even if the person is unwelcome/trespassing... you're responsible for anything that happens to them.

Whereas if one of them takes a paintball to the face and is blinded, the lawsuit will probably win them OP's house. Then they'll own the pool and not have to worry about hopping the fence. ******* around with people on your property is rarely a good idea. You're better off shooting them all dead or calling the cops and holding them at gunpoint until PD shows up. Painting them just sounds like trouble (for OP) waiting to happen.

#11 Way to go. You bashed on rednecks. You stupid Yank.

YDI for overreacting. that was just stupid..

how does one overreact when a group of kids trespass on your property...