Today, I wanted revenge on the rabbit who ate my garden's plants. When he returned, he was standing next to my brand new above-ground swimming pool. I pull out my 22. rifle and shot at it, but the bullet missed and popped a hole in my pool. 15,000 gallons of water flooded my basement. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I heard a gunshot not too far from the house. This is not unusual, as I live way out in the boonies and hunters tend to roam the woods. What isn't normal is a stray bullet hitting my above-ground pool, which promptly split open and released a torrent of water that flooded my basement. FML
Today, while mowing my backyard, I messily discovered that a family of rabbits has been living out there in the tall grass. FML
Today, a few freshmen jumped my fence. They decided to take a dip in the pool, so I pulled out a paintball gun. I unloaded over 100 rounds, painting their backs bright yellow. It also dyed my pool yellow, and it'll apparently cost around $500 to repair. FML
Today, I wanted revenge on my neighbor, whose dog craps in my yard, so I spent a day at the dog park gathering up dog shit. I piled it up by the property line and ran over it with the mower, intending to spray his driveway and car with turds. Instead, it gummed up the mower. Now it stinks too bad to fix. FML
Today, my dog proudly brought home a rabbit he'd killed. The same rabbit that belongs to my neighbor's daughter. FML
Today, I was on my back patio talking with my husband. It got dark outside, and I saw something shuffling in the back yard. I freaked out so bad that I went to run inside, only to fly face-first into the screen door. Turns out the shuffling was a baby rabbit. FML
Today, my 6 ft snake got loose. I found it. It was in my neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit. FML
Today, I shot my boyfriend in the balls by mistake, twice. First it was a paintball gun I was using with my nephew, then it was a slingshot I use to scare away the bird who keeps eating fish from my pond. He is now sat icing his groin acting like I did it on purpose. FML
Today, I drove home on my birthday, and my mom said she'd meet me there. I was a little surprised to get home and find she wasn't there, but even more shocked to see my rabbit run over in my driveway. Turns out he'd gotten loose and my mom had run him over, panicked, and left. FML
Today, after I warned my son repeatedly that if he wanted a rabbit he had to clean and feed it, I checked on it. It wasn’t just dead, it was dead and rotting in a pool of its own pee and faeces. I yelled at him, but he just shrugged and told me rabbits are boring and he forgot it was even there. FML
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Top comments
narks 0
Not only did you try to kill it instead of just relocating it, but you tried to justify your shit aim with 'the bullet missed' instead of 'I missed'. This one calls for a YDI unfortunately.
tkmac 0
Sounds like a Tom & Jerry episode.
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Comments (868)
kbd77 0
#438: With pleasure. You asshole, greedy, arrogant, conservative ***** can keep destroying the world too.
kbd77 0
As someone said after the Plaxico Burress scandal: "What you done that you need a gun to protect yourself?" Guns should be forbidden, except in the military. And even there, we shouldn't just go bomb the shit out of other places when we have conflicts. Anyone ever heard of diplomacy and negotiations?
rlb237 0
YDI for being a ******* ASSHOLE
Michael1011 0
All you "bunny huggers" are pathetic. You are all the kind of people that are stupid enough to jerk the wheel when a rabbit runs out in front of your car to save the rabbits life while putting your life and your passengers lives in danger. It is a rabbit people. Rabbits are ANIMALS not people. Most of you made these comments while feeding your liberal mouths with a hamburger. Where do you think that hamburger came from? Thats right, an "innocent" cow. Most of your arguments are, "it was hungry". Where the hell was the rabbit eating BEFORE the garden. This persons garden wasnt the only food supply for that stupid rabbit so if this person wanted to protect HIS garden from an ANIMAL then he has the right. By the way, this person should have used a .223 caliber with a hollow point bullet. That way if the rabbit is hit it will EXPLODE into little pieces. Pretty entertaining. Most of you people probably never even shot a gun let alone hunt an ANIMAL so you have NO idea what it is like. Oh yeah, a dying rabbit kinda sounds like a crying baby. Think about that tonight when you try to go to sleep, liberals! HAHA!
Gunpar 0
Lologirl, scan your comment for irony before posting. Thanks!
MiizMan 0
well that sucks for you. YDI for shooting at a wild rabbit. rabbits need to eat too! >:( im glad you missed.
audiogasmic 0
you are an asshole, straight up. YDI big time. this is karma's way of bitch slapping you. you sound like my next door neighbor that shot our other neighbor's dogs because they were "digging up his yard". ******* disgusting people with no sympathy for life. sick. seriously, the rabbit was EATING. how the **** was it supposed to know it was your precious little garden? it's an ANIMAL, it felt the need to eat so it did! how can you want to kill it for TRYING TO LIVE!? stupid ******* dumbass. YDI YDI YDI.
beatn 0
HICK
MiizMan 0
#489: ANIMALS ARE LIVING CREATURES TOO. why dont they deserve to live as much as we do? for all i know humans destroyed their natural habitats, which leads them to eat from our gardens and cross the roads. and he missed so that probably would have destroyed his house if he used a .223. you know what...i hope you're reborn as a rabbit when you die. i also hope a hunter shoots you with a .223 so you EXPLODE into little pieces. you have NO idea what it feels like to be shot i bet, so stfu rightwing foo!
audiogasmic 0
#489 you're completely ******* stupid, how was the rabbit supposed to know the difference between the garden and any other source of food? caring about living creatures doesn't make you "liberal", it makes you a decent human being. you sound like a ******* sicko. who gets joy out of blowing up animals? we eat animals because that's how the ******* food chain works. its the same way in the wild. the lions eat the antelopes who eat the grass. you know, that shit. we eat animals because we need the protein, etc. that is completely different from blowing up a rabbit just because it wandered into your garden and ate some of your plants. seriously the OP sounds like the guy that lives next door to me that shot our other neighbor's dogs because they were "digging up his yard". ******* sick! i don't care that most animals are of lesser intelligence than humans, they are still living creatures. if you've ever owned a pet you know that animals can feel, and think,and make connections and patterns (i.e., training, etc). YDI, OP. you're an asshole.