Kids: Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis....

By clean - 16/09/2013 07:51 - Australia - Ashfield

Today, I walked in the bathroom to find my son cleaning his penis. It wouldn't have been so bad if he wasn't cleaning it with a toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 160

You deserved it 4 279

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 02/01/2015 16:20 - Canada - Milton

Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 163

You deserved it 2 669

Doggy dog world

By bigdaddy - 25/09/2009 15:01 - United States

Today, while I was brushing my teeth, my 5 year old-son walked into the bathroom. He gave me a mean look and said, "That's Sammy's toothbrush, not yours." I've been brushing my teeth with the dog's toothbrush for two months now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 286

You deserved it 8 587

By mr.palendrome - 06/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, I was teasing my little brother. Later that night, I went to the bathroom to wash up. While I'm brushing my teeth, my little brother slips a photo under the door that shows him scrubbing my toothbrush against his nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 429

You deserved it 28 099

By Toothy - 02/04/2011 05:03 - United States

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 980

You deserved it 50 037

By Fffhjno - 28/09/2016 18:15 - United States - Providence

Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He was using an earthworm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 106

You deserved it 1 195

By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 237

You deserved it 3 179

Work sucks

By Anonymous - 08/07/2011 19:43 - United States

Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 399

You deserved it 2 645

By uglychick - 05/09/2009 17:29 - Canada

Today, my brother came out of the shower and sat with my mom and me on the couch. He then says he liked the idea of the extra toothbrush in the shower, it helps him clean between his toes. I have been using that to brush my teeth for the last two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 777

You deserved it 9 735

By Anonymous - 20/04/2016 14:34 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, after a fight, I caught my sister rubbing my toothbrush on the inside of our grimy toilet. This is why I have trust issues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 128

You deserved it 1 553

By Waitingtomoveout - 12/01/2017 17:09

Today, I had to remove my brother's pubic hairs from the bathtub before bathing my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 407

You deserved it 763

killuhand 12

Monday 16 September 2013 16:15

can't blame the kid for wanting to be minty fresh

feldco1 17

Monday 16 September 2013 16:16

At least this didnt say "my toothbrush."

Comments

jaychourox121 15

Monday 16 September 2013 17:14

Must've been harder than he thought

grumpybr 13

Monday 16 September 2013 17:14

I'm sorry but I laughed out loud :)

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 16 September 2013 17:23

If his girlfriend is chewing "Orbits" then I think you know what happened earlier.

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 16 September 2013 17:45

Well, OP did say "cleaning his penis"... ... Oh... You meant the tooth brush...

mosquito19 14

Monday 16 September 2013 18:03

does he know toothbrush don't scrub off STD? maybe he was scratching.

nishantvas 13

Monday 16 September 2013 18:06

next time, knock maybe !

spaced94 15

Monday 16 September 2013 18:11

Toughening it up

chelseybella 10

Monday 16 September 2013 18:19

-face palm-

LowExpectations 30

Monday 16 September 2013 18:28

This comment was horrifying and hilarious at the same time. Congrats #7, you made my day :).

martin8337 35

Monday 16 September 2013 18:55

Giggity.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was eating out with a group of friends and my boyfriend. During the meal, I accidentally took a sip from my male friend's glass. My boyfriend pointed and said, "Babe, you took his drink." My friend responded by putting his arm round me and saying, "Whatever, I took her virginity." FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 088

You deserved it 18 231

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 684

You deserved it 7 123

The Top

Today, as I was walking into my apartment building, a douchebag leaned out his truck window and yelled, "HOW MUCH FOR A BJ?" He then pulled into a spot near my car. Apparently I have a charming new neighbor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 574

You deserved it 2 909

Today, I waited tables for the first time at my new restaurant job. I asked a group of older men what they would like. One replied, "A slice of that ass". I'm 19 and a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 030

You deserved it 3 261

Today, a train hit me. A slow mini-train full of kindergartners who were on a tour of the museum I was visiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 492

You deserved it 6 372

Today, my husband put on a nice suit and asked me out to dinner. When he found out I was on my period, he decided to stay home instead, since there was "no point" anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 067

You deserved it 2 638

Today, thinking my girlfriend had left her little black thong in the dryer to tease me, I sent her a picture of me seductively posing with it. She didn't text back, but a few hours later my 16 year old daughter asked if she'd left anything in the dryer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 531

You deserved it 53 243

Today, after being stuck in a traffic jam for quite a long time, my GPS asked me if I wanted to switch to pedestrian mode. FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 51

Same thing different taste

Doggy dog world

Work sucks

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